He paused for a moment. “Do you still plan on climbing back to Heaven?”
I tore my eyes away from the burnt soil and gazed up at his face. His midnight blue eyes were level. If I were to go back to Heaven, I knew he’d be at my side for the whole journey.
But the thought of climbing up so far… it exhausted me to the bone. How could I climb back up when I had so much here that I wanted, but couldn’t quite keep in my grasp?
“I don’t know.” I pulled a long lock of his hair over his shoulder, wrapping the moon-white silk around my fingers. “I know I won’t be able to rest until Gabriel has paid for what he’s done. If I could have everything I wanted, I’d kill Barachiel, Raguel, and Selaphiel, too. But I’ve found so much more here than I’d ever hoped for. Sometimes I think Gabriel did me a favor.”
He pulled me in close and I rested my head on his chest.
“I know he didn’t mean it as a favor,” I amended. “He wanted me to suffer before I died, because he’s a jealous bastard who doesn’t want anyone else touching his toys. But… the way I feel for you… and Lucifer and Azazel… sometimes it frightens me how intense those feelings are. I thought revenge was my driving force, and then there’s days when I’m with all of you, and I’m so happy that I forget how much I hate the archangels.”
He let out a low laugh. “Is that really a bad thing, friend?”
“I guess not. I feel cliche saying love conquers all, but… it feels good to not be full of rage and venom all the time.”
Tascius stroked my hair, his fingers trailing over my shoulder. “But if you chose to give up on your revenge, you might regret it.”
“Yes.” I sighed and closed my eyes. “I want both. I want all of you with me. I want to kill Gabriel. But I’m afraid seeking revenge means I’ll lose one of you.”
“Not if we seek it with you.” His arm tightened around me. “I can’t say I’m sorry Gabriel pushed you out of Heaven, because it means I found you. But none of us would say no to helping you destroy him.”
When I slipped my hand around his back, I felt the ridged scars of his lost wings under my fingertips. “And what if you end up hurt? You don’t have the same invincibility Yraceli had.”
Tascius’s chest moved under my cheek when he exhaled a deep breath. “When I lost my wings, I lost that power. It’s like being half of what I was meant to be. But, you forget…” He raised my chin to look at him. “I’ve survived over twenty years in Belial’s Circle. I don’t need to be invincible to survive.”
“I know,” I said quietly. “But I’ve seen Gabriel in the midst of war. I’ve seen him destroy a legion of demons like it was an afterthought. Any one of us is vulnerable to him.”
“Then why do you worry? It’ll be four against one.”
I held him tighter for a moment, pushing my face against him. “I don’t know. Sometimes it feels like I was given too much when I was supposed to be punished. Like I still owe some suffering to the universe before all of this is done.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he said, pulling me all the way onto his lap. “You shouldn’t have been punished in the first place.”
I traced slow circles on the silky skin of his chest. “I wish I could mark you, like Belial did to me. So I would always feel you and know you were okay.”
Tascius rested his chin on top of my head. I felt like I was in a small sanctuary, a place where no one could touch me, when I was cradled close to him. “We’ll figure it out, little friend.”
“I hope so, big friend.” I looked up at the cut lines of his jaw and throat. The three little words I wanted to say didn’t feel big enough to encompass all I felt for him.
They were burning on the tip of my tongue when several shadows darted across the roof of the arena. Tascius’s entire body went tense at the sight.
“What is it?”
I slid to the ground and grabbed his hand, hurrying back inside and up the stairs. Several Chainlings fell in behind us.
We burst onto the roof, following the pack of Chainlings to the battlements. Vyra was already there, gripping the rail with white-knuckled fingers.
Our quiet moment in the courtyard was completely and utterly destroyed by the tense whispers and hisses, and a cloud of stars and smoke burst into life next to us.
“Azazel, what’s happening?” I looked over my shoulder at the Watcher took solid form. “Where’s Lucifer?”
His sharp face was utterly grim. “With his father. The Dragon decided to stir last night.”
All the blood drained out of my face.
I’d caused this, by burning his roses and threatening him. But what was he doing?
A molten arc of fire streaked across the sky, and my throat tightened. I would know the thundering ash of Arcturus’s hooves anywhere, as Belial headed straight for the Nightside.
I slipped out of Tascius’s grip and fell in at Vyra’s side. She was staring at the streets below, where the smaller roads converged on the large thoroughfare that led up and down the Circles of Dis.
Demons lined the streets, and the one thing that stood out immediately was that all of them were male.
Except for a small group, pulling two women along with them. The demon females went silently, tears streaming down their faces as they headed towards the thoroughfare that a procession had begun to descend.
It was all women. Some were from Lust, dressed in barely-there veils, some from Heresy painted with arcane symbols.
