It probably sounded stupid, but there was a connection in one great kiss that couldn’t be found anywhere else. Something was shared and tapped straight into her chest, hooking her like a loose strand of thread being woven back into place, and that place was only with him.
No matter how much she missed that, Amanda had it with David now. She was the Grinch who stole more than just Saylor’s Christmas.
“No point,” she said, slipping into her blankets. “On to better things.” Like sleeping. Like dreaming of how differently things might have gone with Cole tonight.
Sure, she was distraught at Cole’s abrupt departure, but the night wasn’t a total defeat. He’d sat with her, talking to her. He’d approached her at The Cocoa Bean because he’d wanted to. Not a loss at all, not really.
Even if nothing happened with Cole, she learned one thing tonight. She was approachable. She was still young, and she still had hope.
Yes, she and David were through. But that didn’t mean she was.
Chapter Six
Christmas morning came too soon. Saylor woke with an unpleasant bulge in her chest where her heart should be and decided it was probably not a good idea to spend the day alone.
She dressed quickly and ate a small breakfast of eggs and toast before bundling up and braving the fresh snow. Scraping it from her windshield was therapeutic; the movement, the purpose. It drove away the thoughts she’d been fighting all morning long.
It wasn’t until her phone chimed with her mother’s name on the screen that she remembered they weren’t home.
“Hi, Mom,” she said.
“Merry Christmas,” her mother said brightly. “How did last night go?”
Saylor debated whether to tell her mother about Cole or not, but her dad took over the phone, wishing her well before lamenting in his usual way about the roads, about the state of the economy, and especially about Saylor’s brother, Greg. Saylor headed back inside, unable to help the swelling gratitude she wasn’t there with them now.
Greg had caused her quite a bit of grief several years ago, back in high school when she’d been dating one of Greg’s friends. She’d been suicidal for a brief period, and Greg’s inability to get his life together only added to the stress she’d felt. Saylor had decided to move here to Twin Falls. She’d begun meeting with a therapist regularly, found a job, went back to school, started to maintain some stability and pick up the pieces of her life.
It was shortly after that she’d met David at a friend’s party, and things had spiraled upward from there, from good, to amazing, to incredible bliss.
And then they’d nose-dived.
Thank goodness for Netflix. It was the one thing she hadn’t been able to let go of despite things being tight. TV gave her an escape when she was sitting by herself at night after Parker had gone to bed. It kept her company now, with an endless stream of sappy Hallmark Christmas movies. Too cheesy to be taken seriously. Maybe that was why she enjoyed them so much.
She ate a frozen ham and potatoes microwave dinner and drank the small bottle of sparkling cider from the work gift basket all the employees had gotten, determined not to let her loneliness eat at her in the meantime.
Parker didn’t call any too soon, giddy with excitement at having gone sledding with Amanda, with excitement at the delicious feast they ate for lunch, and especially from all the presents he got, including the Minecraft Lego set Saylor had sent with him. He’d been eyeing it for weeks.
“Dad got me a skateboard.” Parker beamed.
“Wow,” Saylor said, wishing he’d discussed it with her first and knowing there was no point.
“We’ll be home tomorrow,” Parker said. “But Amanda’s family said I can come back anytime I want. They said they’d even take me hunting.”
“Hunting, wow.”
“You okay, Mom? You’ve been saying ‘wow’ a lot lately.”
Saylor smiled. “Have I?” How in the world did she explain what she was really feeling to this small boy? “I’m just excited to hear everything you’re up to.”
“I’m excited too. See you tomorrow, Mom. Love you!”
“Love you too, Parks.”
IT WOULD BE SO LIKE Brooke to show up unannounced and uninvited, and Cole wasn’t ready to see her again yet. So he spent Christmas Day at his office.
The navy blue, boxy couch across from his desk really wasn’t too bad, and he kept the fridge stocked and a change of clothes stashed in one of the drawers, just in case. How pathetic was this, spending Christmas alone, hiding from his ex?
Saylor Bates floated in his mind far more frequently than he thought she would. Her pretty face, the light in her eyes, her refreshing conversation and clever attempt to placate her son’s worries. Cole found himself wondering how she was, spending her Christmas away from her little boy. Did she have family nearby? He thought of Parker too, hoping the boy’s time away was okay. He knew his nieces would be crushed spending Christmas away from their mom, Cole’s sister.
Cole crossed to the mini fridge and retrieved a bottle of orange juice, kicking the fridge door shut and wishing he could kick himself in like manner for walking out on Saylor before he’d gotten her number.
“She must have been so confused,” he said to Bubba Jones sitting on the couch’s armrest. The black cat with white paws rose at being addressed and made his way onto Cole’s lap, purring.
Cole’s interest wasn’t only to check on Saylor. She’d been great company, funny, bright, quick-witted. He wanted to get to know her, to discover the secrets in her eyes.
Too bad he was too late. The only information he had was her last name and where she worked.
Where she worked.
Cole straightened with a rush of adrenaline. Affronted at being knocked from his place, Bubba Jones leapt to the floor. Drex Corp was on Cole’s route to work—he passed it nearly every day. Excitement built in his chest. Surely,
