“I can’t believe I’ve been daydreaming about a woman who could do something like this.”
“Hawk, please.”
He turned his back to her, speaking to the lockers and the collection of stolen items on the bench in front of them. “It’s over. I’m not going to press charges,” he said. “But I never want to see you again.”
He stalked out without another word, ripping her heart the rest of the way.
Ella crumpled to the cement. Tears streamed down her cheeks as emotion, betrayal, heartbreak poured from her in waves. Helplessness crushed her with unforeseen force.
It wasn’t until the tears ceased, till she felt the strength, the will to stand that she saw it. Lying beside the broken printer, the tablets, and her purse, the shoe she’d accidentally left in Hawk’s office. It sparkled on the bench beside the stolen goods, a painful reminder of everything she’d just lost.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Ella had worked early morning custodial for so long, her body was trained to wake up at three-thirty am whether she had an alarm or not. The fact that she slept until five-ten was laudable. She sat up in bed, but the usual pressure to dress and brave the cold to be on time to work extinguished the instant memories of yesterday’s events rushed in.
A wedge in her chest grew heavier with every step. Nothing she did—straightening her apartment, sewing pieces for a quilt she was making for the homeless shelter using leftover pillowcase scraps, wallowing on her bed after a tasteless lunch of bread and cheese—did anything to ease it.
How could it? Not only had she been accused of theft, but she’d been publicly humiliated in front of the man she was falling in love with. He thought she was a crook. A scummy liar.
A line from Pride and Prejudice haunted her. After her sister’s scandal, Elizabeth Bennet lamented not only that she’d lost any chances of being with Mr. Darcy, but that he thought badly of her because of it.
“I cannot bear to think that he is alive in the world and thinking ill of me,” Lizzy had bemoaned.
It perfectly described Ella’s own regrets. It was one thing to be accused of such a horrific thing. But to have Hawk believe it of her? Hard as she tried, she couldn’t manage to fill her lungs completely. Her reputation, her pride, had been completely destroyed.
What could she do? She didn’t have the first clue how she could prove her innocence. At least Chloe was still gone so she didn’t have to witness this. She’d managed to transfer her ticket and had flown out to Illinois Christmas afternoon instead.
A knock interrupted her thoughts. Of all the people she thought it could be, Ella never expected to find her dad on the doorstep. The shame that had been eating at her since she woke redoubled its efforts, weakening her knees and compressing her throat. She hadn’t seen him in so long. Why did he have to come to see her now, with her wallowing in misery?
Dad’s thinning hair was graying more along his temples than it’d been the last time she’d seen him. He wore glasses and a sweater over a collared shirt. Still, he was as handsome as she’d remembered. His looks must have been what had drawn Stina to him.
“Dad? What are you doing here?”
“Mind if I come in?” he asked. “Stina told me what happened.”
Ella stiffened. “So you care about me now that I’m a potential criminal?”
He gave a weak wince. “Be fair,” he said, entering and kicking snow from his shoes. “You knew you could come for Christmas if you wanted to.”
She closed the door behind him and, without waiting or inviting him to follow, made her way back to the living room. The space was still clean, thanks to Grammy, Adelie, Suzie, and Chloe. Dad’s mention of Christmas hunched her shoulders that much more. How could he bring that up? Her stomach sickened as if she’d drunk poison.
The old Ella would have brushed this off. She would have smiled and given her dad the benefit of the doubt.
She was so done with benefitting doubt.
Ella rotated to face him. He was standing beside her couch. “Your wife has made it clear how unwelcome I am, Dad. And frankly, you’ve done little to help me think otherwise.”
“Ella Bell,” he said in a pleading way. “Come on.”
Pain climbed in her chest. “No, Dad. You’ve hurt me. Stina hurts me. So I’ve stayed away.” She wasn’t sure where this gumption was coming from. It was what she’d always dreamed of saying to him. Maybe now, with defeat coursing through her, she couldn’t ruin anything worse than it already was.
“I thought, since you continued working for her, things were okay.”
Ella released a pained laugh. She couldn’t bring herself to sit, and her father hadn’t either. They stood like opposite poles on a planet, each on one end of the room.
“I work for her because I thought you wanted me to. I have spent all my time trying to please everyone else. Look where that’s gotten me.”
Ribs squeezing with heartache, she gave in and sank onto her couch. Her father joined her, taking the cushion beside her. He reached for her hand, but she pulled away.
“Clearly, we’ve been miscommunicating here,” he said almost inwardly. “Ella, I want you to come and visit me whenever you’d like to. And if you don’t want to work for Stina, then don’t.”
She scrubbed at her nose. “It’s a little late for that. She fired me! I’ll be lucky if I can find a new job, period. And as long as Pris is living there at your house, I’m not coming over.”
“Pris is engaged,” he said. “To Derek Cummins. I guess it happened Christmas Eve.”
“Good for her.”
He settled onto the couch, looking perplexed. “I don’t get it. What do you have against her?”
Ella couldn’t take any more. Outraged, she jumped to her feet. The pain she’d hidden for years began gushing out. “She set me
