“Hate what, sis? Something is really bothering you.” Her tender tone made tears prick my eyes.
“Frankie walked in on us fucking and she had no idea we were even together,” I confessed.
“Oh no…” Navy sighed. “Is she okay?”
“No. She’s hurt. She made me promise her I wouldn’t get involved with Evander. She said she sees the way women look at him and she didn’t want me to be one of those women. I promised her I wouldn’t be. Now…look at me.”
“Have you talked to her?” Navy asked.
“I tried but she keeps telling me to leave her alone. She won’t talk to her father either. I don’t know how to tell her that dick is everywhere, but chemistry isn’t. I don’t know how to package that for a twelve-year-old.”
“Leaving the dick is everywhere part out would be a great start.”
“It’s so true though. I can’t tell you how many casual fucks I’ve had but Evander is different.”
“He must be because you’ve changed since working for him.”
“I have. In the best ways. He’s changed too.” A smile tried to inch across my lips but stopped once Frankie popped into my head.
“Now that you mention it, he has changed. He’s so laid back now,” she noticed.
“See, that’s all me. There’s no way to show Frankie how much we care about each other. All she knows is that I’m fucking her father. Evander and I wanted to tell her in a comfortable setting so she wouldn’t feel like either of us lied to her or hurt her but now…” My words trailed off.
“It’ll be okay, Xari. If you’re really in love with Senator Freeman…I mean, Evander then Frankie finding out like this isn’t going to kill the relationship. It’s a hiccup for sure but not the end.”
“Thanks, sissy. Are you mad at me for being with Evander?” I wanted to know what Navy thought. Her opinion meant a lot to me.
“I’m shocked. Well, I was when I put it together. I was never upset though.”
“Shocked?” A small laugh slipped out.
“Yeah. You and him are polar opposites. He’s so straight-laced and you’re such a wild child. I’ve worked with him for a year now and I thought he lived and breathed being a senator. I used to wonder if he went home and plugged himself in at night to recharge.” She laughed at the notion. I understood how she could have that perception of him because I had it too.
“The only time I’ve seen him relax a little is when Frankie is around. You’ve unlocked a part of him. It’s interesting.” I shifted on the bed and pulled my knees up to my chest. I missed Evander right then. I wanted nothing more than to lay my head on his chest.
“Navy,” I said in a small voice. “What if he wants to put things between us on hold until he can get Frankie to come around?” The silent worry leaped from my heart and into the air. I couldn’t take it back once it left my mouth.
“I don’t think that’s going to happen, Xari.”
“He will do anything for Frankie and I don’t blame him I’m just wondering where that’s going to leave us.” I sucked in a quick breath then shook the selfishness from my thoughts. “You know what…it’ll be fine. If he needs to put a hold on us to work things out with his daughter then who am I to pout about it, right?”
“Yeah but that hasn’t happened yet so you’re tripping over a hypothetical situation. Calm down, Xari. I’ve never seen you confused before. This is weird.”
“I’m not confused. I know Evander loves me I just don’t know if love is enough when there’s a kid involved.” The weight of being with Evander hit me hard.
Being with him meant I’d have to shift my relationship with Frankie. It would mean the possibility of being a stepmother one day.
The thought chilled my blood.
A stepmom?
Could I handle that?
Sure, it was fine when I was Frankie’s nanny but there was a chance that things between Evander and I could grow and blossom. It meant I’d have to deal with Alexis on a personal level and not a professional one.
Everything I knew as a part of my job would fuse with my personal life. I couldn’t shrug it off. I would have a man with a kid and a quintessential baby mama. I hated that term with a passion and always tried to say child’s mother instead but no phrase fit Alexis better than calling her what the fuck she was…a bitter baby mama.
“Xari, you there?” Navy’s voice cut through my fog.
“Yeah…just thinking, that’s all.”
“About?”
“Being a stepmom one day and dealing with Alexis,” I rolled my eyes involuntarily at her name coming out of my mouth. Ugh. It felt sour.
“Wow, you jumped ahead, didn’t you? Don’t worry about being Frankie’s stepmom or fighting with Alexis. Right now, focus on repairing what’s broken with Frankie and working out your new relationship with Senator Freeman.” She sang his name in a teasing way that forced a reluctant smile on my face.
“Stop it, Navy,” I chuckled.
“Xari and Evander sitting in a tree…”
“I will disown you. We are not in elementary school,” I hissed.
“K-I-S-S-I-N-G…”
“Oh my god, Navy. You’re supposed to be the mature one. Stop it.”
“First comes love…”
“Navy!” I snapped. I still couldn’t stop myself from cracking up laughing. My shoulders jumped with each line she sang.
“Then comes marriage. Then comes the baby in a baby carriage.”
“Ugh. I am not getting pregnant and stretching my body out. I’ve seen what babies do to a perfectly nice body.” I frowned at the thought of being pregnant but something in my mind jumped up and down with glee at the thought of having Evander’s
