“He’s doing alright.” The question rolls right off his broad shoulders.
Another non-answer. I’m not getting clues about either man’s wealth tonight. It only makes me question it more.
But maybe interrogating Sterling isn’t the route to take. He’s never liked answering questions, but he never minds telling a story if you nudge him toward one. “You two have the same tattoo.”
I’d noticed Jack’s inked forearm when he was feeding me shots. The art is the same. The location is the same. I know it can’t be a coincidence.
“We met in the Marines,” Sterling says. At last, an answer, but there’s a finality to his tone. He knows I’m angling to learn more about his past and he’s warning me to stop talking about it.
That doesn’t mean that I’m going to. “You never told me about your time in the Armed Forces.”
“That’s not an oversight.”
Before I can press him harder, he stands up and holds out his hand. “Care to dance, Lucky?”
“If you stop calling me that.” I counter his offer. I need to erect some boundaries—and quickly.
“I didn’t mean to make you mad.” He sounds genuine.
That only makes it harder to resist the incessant tug of memories I feel when he’s around. I can’t bring myself to look directly at him. I’m not sure I can handle seeing his eyes. “Look, we can pretend for everyone else,” I say, “but let’s not fool ourselves.”
Sterling’s shoulders square, his jaw tensing before he tips his head with a terse nod. “Fair enough. We should still dance,” he says, adding, “for the sake of appearance.”
If he’s going to act nonchalant about this, so can I. “Let’s go.”
It’s been a long time since I’ve been out dancing. Stilted waltzes at charity galas don’t count. This is dancing—letting loose, laughing. Even if my partner is Sterling Ford. I need more of this. There’s no sick father to care for anymore. Ellie’s old enough that I don’t have to worry about Ginny leaving her to cry in her crib. I might not be free of Valmont but my leash is finally lengthening. This is life. The music soaks into my skin, like the whiskey moving in my bloodstream, and leaves me no choice but to give in and feel good.
Poppy and Kai join us, him singing along to the song playing. That’s when it happens. A girl spots us and begins to shriek. “I knew it! It is him!”
Kai’s eyes close for just a moment as if gathering strength before he turns on his million-dollar smile. Pretty soon, he’s surrounded, signing napkins, and taking selfies. Jack’s guys move in to break up the impromptu autograph session, but Kai waves them off. We back away to give the fans more room.
“He claims he hates the attention,” Poppy says.
“Bullshit,” we both say at the same time.
The truth is, like any famous person, Kai wants privacy every now and then, but he totally feeds off the attention. It drives him, and no one deserves it more.
A chant begins in the crowd and it takes a moment for my whiskey-marinated brain to process they want him to sing. It’s about that same time that Kai’s hand closes over mine and he drags me to the stage. Sterling and Poppy begin catcalling my name. It’s easy to know it’s them since everyone else is screaming Kai’s.
“Have you lost your mind?” I hiss, trying to escape.
Kai plops his Stetson on my head. “I know you can sing, girl. Now don’t break my heart and tell me you don’t know my songs.”
“Of course, I know them.” I tilt the brim up and glare at him. Like I wouldn’t know every one of his songs! He presses a microphone into my hands, and I realize he actually wants me to sing with him. On stage. In front of everyone.
Oh my God. The first bars of the song start playing before I can chicken out.
Some blood is thicker than water…
I join in with Kai instinctively, belting his first number one hit.
And there’s whiskey hotter than fire.
I know you should treat me better,
But I don’t care if you’re a liar
Cause some love is sweeter than air.
I took you home to meet my family.
My mama cried when she saw you.
She said that boy won’t ever treat you kindly.
Son, some bastards can’t stay true.
I don’t mean to look at Sterling as the words surge from me, because my gaze travels to him like he’s magnetized. People think this song is sad. Maybe if it is if you know better.
I thought our love would last for always,
But you drank me gone one lonely night.
Now I’m drinking to our yesterdays
Cause some bastards can’t treat ya right.
Our love is water and it’s fire,
So pour another and lie to me.
I’ll drink to forget that you’re a liar
Cause I need your love to breathe.
There’s a reason I can’t stop looking at the man in the crowd. There’s a reason why no matter how hard I try to keep away, I can’t. There’s a reason I can’t separate desire from hate anymore. This is the only kind of love I’ve ever known.
And he’s the one who showed me it.
27
Adair
THE PAST
“Maybe this isn’t a good idea,” I say for the hundredth time since I picked Sterling up in front of his dormitory. My hand taps the steering wheel, out of beat with the song playing on the radio. That’s how I feel: out of sync. I’m not sure that this is going to help.
“You can’t avoid it,” he says. He reaches and turns off the music.
I’m still tapping the wheel, trying to disperse all the emotions building inside me. “I know.”
His hand closes over mine, drawing it away from the wheel. Sterling weaves his fingers through mine and holds it. “It’s going to be okay, Lucky.”
For the first time his nickname for me doesn’t feel like an insult. It feels like
