The smile slips from his face, but he nods. “I thought you might.”
“There’s some things that we should discuss,” I begin.
“You can do that with me,” Malcolm interrupts before I can tell Felix my plans. It’s not like him to be home this early. His shirt sleeves are rolled to his elbows. Judging from his bloodshot eyes, he’s already on his second drink of the afternoon.
“Tough day at the office?” I ask.
“No, long night followed by an even longer morning,” he says. Clearly, he didn’t appreciate me sending him home to his wife and daughter yesterday. He lists a bit on his feet, and I worry he’ll tip over on the marble floor.
“Maybe you should slow down before dinner,” I suggest.
“Care to tell me where you’ve been?” he asks.
I slip the envelope into my purse and brace for impact. There’s no way I’m explaining myself to him. Malcolm may think he can replace our father as head of house, but I’m done living under a man’s thumb. “I’m an adult. I don’t owe you an explanation.”
“Exactly! I don’t care where you were last night,” he spits back. He lowers his voice so that it won’t echo in the foyer. “You could afford me the same courtesy in the future.”
“I’m not the one who’s married,” I say, “and cheating on his wife!”
Felix shows no sign of surprise at this revelation. He busies himself with arranging the blossoms. As usual, he’s here blending into the background. He’s always been more than a keeper of the kitchen and schedules and party plans. He’s a keeper of our secrets. Our own professional guardian hired by our mother to watch over us. I often think mom would be disappointed in us, because I know Felix is.
“Goddammit, Adair!” Malcolm storms to daddy’s office and I’m right behind him. He points behind me. “Shut the door.”
I do so because, unlike Malcolm, I know that Felix is listening. And where Felix is, Ellie is usually nearby. She doesn’t need to hear us argue.
“What are you freaking about out about now?” I ask.
“I got a call this afternoon from Trish McHugh at Bluebird Press,” he tells me. “She wanted to touch base with me about business given our father’s passing. By the way, she sends her condolences.”
My hand finds the smooth side of the bookshelf and I lean into it.
He continues, his eyes hard and dark like our father’s would be if he were here. “She also wanted to make certain that there’s not going to be an interruption of ownership given that she just hired a new editor.”
“I don’t see how any of this involves you,” I say. “Daddy left Bluebird to me.”
“Did you tell her that?” he asks. “I can’t imagine there are many Adairs out there with English degrees looking for editorial jobs in downtown Nashville.”
I shrug, trying to act casual. “You might be surprised. It’s not like there’s a lot of work for English majors.”
“Don’t sass me,” he says, channeling Daddy even more. I half-expect him to whip off his belt and drive the point home.
Not that I would let him. Not that anyone will ever touch me that way again. I push away from the bookshelf, forcing myself to stand firmly on my feet. I will not back down to him. Not today. Not ever. “You mind your business and I’ll mind mine. I know what I’m doing.”
“Says the slut getting in bed with Sterling Ford,” he says.
“You have no idea what’s going on. You don’t even know who he is.” I let one man slander Sterling in this office before. I won’t do it again.
“And you do?”
“Do you know what’s going to ruin you?” I step toward him to deliver one final blow before I leave him and this house and this life behind. “The same thing that ruined daddy. Your fucking pride. Your arrogance. You can’t see beyond your own shadow because you’re too certain of every move you make.”
“That arrogance built us this company.”
“That arrogance lost us this company and killed our mother,” I explode.
Malcolm gives a disgusted shake of his head. “You’ll never forgive him for that will you?”
“Why would I? He never apologized.” How can he still not understand?
“You’re selfish and spoiled. You never understood sacrificing for the good of the family.”
“I haven’t sacrificed?” I ask softly. Doesn’t he see that being here now is proof that I’ve given up everything for this family? “All I care about is this family. Can you say the same?”
“Why don’t you say what you really mean? I’ve never cared about the right members of this family.” Hate drips from his words as slow and sticky as molasses. It’s in his blood. He was born poisoned with it.
“Felix took care of you and El—”
“I don’t have as liberal of view of who is a MacLaine as you do.”
“I can’t do this anymore.” I shake my head. It’s swimming with all the mistakes we’ve made. Mistakes we keep making. It’s too much. “I can’t just sit by and watch you cling to this lie about what the MacLaine name means. What it stands for.”
“So, you’re going to pick up a hammer and start destroying it yourself?”
“Sometimes it’s better to tear down what’s broken than to waste time fixing what can’t be saved.” I wait for him to respond. When he doesn’t, I walk to the door.
He finds his voice as my hand touches the knob. “If you walk out of this house, don’t come back.”
It’s not the first time I’ve heard that in this room. But it’s going to be the last.
“This was never my house. It’s not yours either. Wear your crown, rule your false empire, but don’t forget that it’s all made of glass.”
I leave Magnolia Lane, passing by houses that would open their doors for me in a heartbeat. I’m always welcome in Valmont, but everything here has a cost. I’ve
