Part of him wanted to reach out and take her hand—to walk hand in hand through the castle with her. But the idea made him feel edgy; there was so much that could go wrong. So he fell back on the safety of dry facts. ‘It was built for Robert Stewart, the first Duke of Albany. It has one of the best-preserved halls in Scotland.’
He was really glad he’d checked his phone the night before and looked up facts and figures, because it meant he could talk to her about history instead of blurting out his feelings as they wandered through the castle.
‘Look at that fireplace! It’s taller than me, and it’s massive. I can just imagine sitting here at a really long table with a trencher in front of me, with dishes of carved meats and flagons of ale,’ she said as they walked through the Great Hall.’
He’d always thought that he didn’t have much imagination, but suddenly he could see her sitting beside him in a wine-coloured velvet dress, her golden hair long and wavy and topped by a crown, and a choker of emeralds to match her eyes...
Spending time with Georgie made him feel different. It made him see his surroundings through fresh eyes; he’d grown so used to the hills and the sunrises and the sheep that he’d taken them for granted, but Georgie had made him look at things differently, really see them. The wide expanse of Porty Beach, the imposing ruins here, then clambering over the uneven path by the battlement to look out over the river to the Menteith Hills and Ben Lomond in the distance. How had he forgotten how amazing this was?
Then she tripped, and he grabbed her to keep her safe.
Oh, help. Being this close to her, feeling the warmth of her body against his—it made him want more.
She looked at him, and time seemed to stop. He was oh, so aware of how wide her eyes were, how soft her mouth was, how easy it would be to dip his head and kiss her.
He was at the point of doing exactly that when there was a cough beside them, followed by a plaintive, ‘Do you mind letting us get past?’
Saved by the tourist, he thought as he dropped his arms from round Georgie and moved so the man and his family could get past.
‘Are you OK?’ he asked. Georgie looked shaken. Because of her near trip right next to the castle battlements and a sheer drop, or because of the almost-kiss? He was too scared of the answer to ask.
‘I’m fine,’ she said, sounding a little breathless. ‘Thank you for stopping me falling.’
‘You’re welcome,’ he said, but he was still tingling all over from touching her.
Once they were back on the ground floor, they wandered through the gift shop, and Georgie seemed highly amused by the basket of coconut shells for visitors to borrow—and the children running round in the courtyard outside, banging the coconut shells together and pretending to be horses.
‘I still can’t quite get over the fact that I’m walking round the Monty Python castle. It’s my dad’s favourite film. Would you mind taking a snap of me on my phone in front of the castle, so I can print it off and send it to him with some of those coconut shells?’
‘Sure,’ he said. And her delight in doing something nice for her dad made him feel as if something had cracked in the region of his heart. What would it be like to have that sort of bond with your family, that sort of closeness, all those shared memories? He wasn’t envious, exactly; more wistful.
If his mum hadn’t been killed, his life would’ve been so different. Maybe she would’ve made it up with her family; maybe she would’ve found a new partner and he would’ve had a dad, or even a baby brother or sister.
Nobody had loved him enough to want to keep him for long. Then again, he’d had the chance to make a family with Zoe, and he hadn’t let his heart open wide enough to embrace a family. So really it was just as much his fault. What was wrong with him, that he couldn’t let people close? Why was he so scared of rejection? Why couldn’t he move on, away from his past?
He pushed the thoughts away and concentrated on her, taking the photograph as she’d asked.
‘You could act a bit out in front of the curtain wall and I’ll film it,’ he said. ‘Then you can send it to him after you’ve posted the shells to him.’
She laughed. ‘Genius. Thank you.’
It was impossible not to laugh as she recreated a bit of the film.
‘Did you ever think about acting?’ he asked.
‘No. I always wanted to be a doctor. And it wasn’t just to copy my big brother—I wanted to make a difference and really help people,’ she said. ‘When I did my rotation, I was quite tempted by obstetrics, because I love those first precious moments of a new life. But I love working with children.’
Was it just working with kids, though? Was her biological clock ticking? He’d decided a long time ago that he didn’t want kids. If Georgie did, then that was a good reason to keep things strictly platonic between them—otherwise he’d be letting her down, the same way he’d let Zoe down.
At the same time, the more time he spent with her, the more time he wanted to spend with her. She made him see the world in a different way.
She was here for six months. She wasn’t necessarily looking for for ever. Maybe—the base of his spine tingled with longing—maybe they could have a fling. Be each other’s transition person. Get this thing out of both of their systems and move on.
‘What about you?’ she asked.
‘I wanted to make
