My last statement was meant to be a compliment, but I felt a small spike of annoyance from Electra as I spoke. Familiar with this from past experience, I knew that my comment had somehow invoked the specter of Myshtal, and a moment later it was proven.
“I had a question about something,” Electra began. “When I was there yesterday, I noticed that your grandmother called Myshtal by a different name – Isteria. I also remember her being introduced that way at the party.”
“Yeah,” I droned. “Isteria is her formal name.”
“So is ‘Myshtal’ like a nickname, then?”
“Sort of,” I admitted, suddenly not liking the direction of the conversation. “But it’s also her name – one of her middle names, that is.”
“So what does it mean?”
I cleared my throat before speaking. “Ahem. It’s. uh, just a term of affection between women who are close relatives or good friends.”
“And when a man uses it?” she asked.
“Excuse me?” I replied.
“You said it’s a term of affection used between women,” she explained, looking me in the eye. “You’re not a woman. So what does it mean when a man uses it?”
I lowered my eyes. “For a man, it’s, uh…it’s uhm…it’s usually an epithet for a woman he’s involved with. Romantically.”
Electra leaped to her feet, ire and irritation exploding within her.
“Are you kidding me?!” she screamed. “You’ve been calling her your girlfriend this entire time?!”
“No!” I insisted, rising as well. “It’s how she was introduced to me, and by the time I learned her formal name, it was too late. Mentally, I couldn’t think of her with another name.”
Electra lifted her hands up as if trying to push away something invisible yet oppressive.
“I’m sorry, Jim,” she finally said. “It’s just…it’s too much.” She went silent for a few seconds, and then took a deep breath. “I think…I think maybe…”
No, I thought. Don’t say it. Please.
Strengthening her resolve, she blurted out, “I think maybe we need to take a break.”
And there it was. I lowered my head, trying to get a grip on what had just happened, but it was difficult. It felt like something deep inside me – something intricate and integral to my well-being – had just been removed. No, not removed: ripped out.
“Look, maybe it’s the right time for this,” she went on. “I just found out this morning that my father’s getting out.”
“Really?” I said, trying to sound happy for her but failing miserably.
She nodded. “Yeah, he’s getting paroled and will be staying here with us.”
“That’s great,” I mumbled.
She cast her eyes up to the ceiling for a second. “Esper’s super excited. I think she’s hunting around in the attic for some old memorabilia – pics of them together and stuff like that.”
I muttered something, but had no idea what it was.
“Anyway,” Electra said, “my point was that with my dad here, I’d want to spend some time with him, so maybe it’s the right moment for us to take a step back.”
“I disagree,” I said solemnly. “I can make this right. I just need some time.”
Electra shook her head, and I noticed for the first time that she was crying. “I’m sorry, but I just can’t be like the mistress of a married man, waiting for him to leave his wife. That’s what this feels like, Jim, with your continual promises but no results. I love you, I really do, but you need to fix this. Until that happens, we can’t be together.”
Chapter 96
I left Electra’s house shortly after she broke up with me. For once, I didn’t teleport – I couldn’t think of where to go – so I just stepped out the front door and started walking.
I’d been wandering aimlessly for maybe thirty minutes, trying to pull myself together, when my phone rang. I looked at the caller ID and saw that the number was blocked.
Sighing, I answered the phone but didn’t say anything.
“Carrow,” Gray said. “My office.”
And then he hung up, laughing.
*****
A few minutes later, I was in the back of the SUV.
“Just wanted to let you know it’s done,” he said.
I nodded. “I heard. Thanks for keeping your word.”
“No thanks necessary,” Gray assured me. “On the other hand, I’m sure this won you major points with your girlfriend. You must really love her to use the freebie I offered to get her father out.”
I merely shrugged, but didn’t say anything. Obviously noting that I was out of sorts, Gray gave me a hard stare.
“Look,” he said after a few seconds, “don’t beat yourself up about what happened to Jack. It wasn’t your fault.”
I frowned for a moment, trying to figure out how we’d gotten on this subject, then understood. Gray had realized I was despondent, but misidentified the cause. He seemingly thought I was upset about Jack.
“Moreover,” Gray continued, “that was the only way it was going to end – with either him or you in the ground.”
Wrinkling my brow in curiosity, I asked, “Why do you say that?”
Gray sighed. “Remember when I said that clones always want to meet their originals? It’s actually more than that. The clones fixate on the originals, including every aspect of their lives. Eventually, they try to replace them.”
There was a faraway look in his eyes as he spoke, and emotionally I felt not just truth from him, but a profound sense of understanding.
“This isn’t just theoretical or abstract for you, is it?” I asked. “This is personal in some way.”
Gray didn’t immediately answer. Instead, he was silent for a few moments, as if wondering how much to share with me. Finally, he seemed to mentally flip a coin.
“I wasn’t lying when I said I was ready to quit this job,” he said. “I’ve wanted to retire for years. But as I explained, I couldn’t just walk away. Considering who was slated to succeed me, it would have been chaos. An absolute disaster. So I tried to think of another solution.”
“You had yourself cloned,” I stated. It wasn’t a question.
Gray didn’t deny it. “He was supposed to take over the job for
