“It’s not what you think,” Sarah said, as if reading my mind. “I didn’t like the guy – not like that, anyway. I mean we hit it off, but it was completely platonic.”
“Well, if that’s all true, why go out with him a second time? Why keep it from Smokey?”
She put her hands to her face, then pushed them up and back, running her fingers through her hair. “I just needed a break from the pressure,” she said.
I gave her a stunned look, then quickly turned my attention back to the road, as I was still driving. “Wait a minute. Smokey’s been pressuring you?” I’m sure the surprise showed in my voice, because what she seemed to be suggesting was something I never would have suspected. “Has he been pushing you to–”
“No, no, no,” she stressed forcefully. “It’s not pressure from him I’m talking about. It’s pressure from you guys – his friends.”
I had trouble hiding my astonishment. After a few moments, I said, “I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to explain that.”
She sighed. “You, Electra, Li – you guys are all Smokey’s friends and you’re all supers, with cool powers. On top of that, you go on amazing adventures together. By comparison, I can’t help but be boring.”
“That’s not true,” I insisted. “You’re lots of fun, and we love hanging out with you.”
“Yes, but I have to be ‘on’ all the time. I don’t have any amazing abilities, so I have to compete on personality. I have to constantly be smiling, bubbly, charming and so on – especially when we’re around you guys.”
“Sarah, I’m sorry,” I said sincerely. “I apologize if we ever made you feel like you had to be or act in any way contrary to what you feel.”
“And that just makes it worse,” she intoned. “It would be a lot easier if you guys were aloof snobs, arrogant jerks, boorish imbeciles, or something along those lines. Then it wouldn’t matter to me because I wouldn’t want to be your friend anyway. But you’re all friendly and funny and nice, which just makes me feel like I have to do even more to appear interesting.”
I nodded. “I think I understand, and again I apologize if we did something to make you feel you couldn’t be yourself around us.”
“You don’t need to apologize for being a nice guy, or for having nice friends.”
“Well, if it’ll take some of the pressure off, I could always be a jerk and backhand you – rough you up a bit,” I said, and raised my hand mockingly.
She laughed, the first sound I’d heard from her today that didn’t come out heavy with gloom.
“I appreciate the offer,” she commented, “but I’ll manage.”
“Anyway,” I said, “this guy you went out with?”
She sighed. “As I said, we hit it off, but it was platonic. I just had a good time hanging out with someone without feeling like I had to compete or perform. I went out with the guy again because of that reason, not because I had feelings for him, so it wasn’t a real date, in my opinion. I didn’t tell Smokey because I wasn’t sure I could properly explain it without making him feel like he had to choose between me and his friends. That’s not a choice I wanted him making, because…”
She trailed off without finishing, but from her emotional vibe, I knew what she was feeling.
“You think that if Smokey has to make that kind of choice, you’ll lose,” I concluded.
She nodded. “It’s like you’re a poor kid whose best friend has a rich neighbor who’s always inviting him to big parties, offering him limo rides, and so on. How do you compete?”
Her face took on a pained expression, and emotionally I noted an ache in her so potent that it almost equated to physical pain. She felt completely dejected, like she was drowning in a sea of hopelessness and despair.
I desperately wished that there was something I could do for her, that I had some ability to cure what ailed her. I did have a healing ability, but it didn’t come at my beck and call, and even if it did, it only worked on a physical level. It wouldn’t do any good here.
And then, I suddenly realized that there was something I could do for Sarah. I pulled over to the side of the road, and then turned to her, opening my arms. Without a word, she leaned over and buried her face in my shoulder, sobbing fitfully as I gave her a hug.
Chapter 36
It only took Sarah a few minutes to get it all out and then regain her composure. I had pulled over maybe a block from her school and then waited patiently in case there was more she wanted to say, but she had seemingly said her piece. Subtly checking my watch, it appeared that Sarah was in no danger of being late, which meant we had time to address the real reason I’d wanted to see her.
“Look,” I began, “I’ll say something to Smokey, but I can’t promise he’ll listen to me.”
“I know,” she said with a nod, dabbing her eyes with tissue again. “But if you can just get him to talk to me, it’ll be enough.”
“Okay, in the meantime, though, there was something I needed to ask you about. Remember when you said something about having talked to me on Friday?”
*****
It didn’t take long to explain the situation to Sarah, and get the story out of her. Although plainly unnerved by the thought of me having an evil twin, she detailed what had happened in fairly succinct terms.
“You dropped by for a friendly visit on Friday after I got in from school,” she said. “The conversation naturally turned to Smokey, and you promised you’d talk to him for me.”
“Did I say anything else?” I asked, noting how odd it was to be speaking of my lookalike as if he
