“Hello?” I said, almost cautiously.
“Hey,” she responded.
I was expecting more, since she had called me, but she didn’t immediately say anything. It occurred to me then that she was working up to something, so I just held the phone, not saying anything.
Finally she let out a sigh and said, “I’m sorry about this morning. I wasn’t being completely fair to you.”
“It’s okay,” I replied. “I mean, it’s a crazy situation that we’re in. There aren’t any rules for something like this.”
“No kidding. I had a tough time explaining it to my dad.”
“What?!” I exclaimed, not quite believing what I’d heard. “You told your dad? Why would you do that?”
“Because he’s my dad,” she said matter-of-factly. “I mean, he’s never been a part of my life before, but now that he is, I want us to be close. That means sharing things.”
“Yeah, but you don’t tell him that your boyfriend has a fiancée. Nothing good can ever come of that.”
“Ex-boyfriend,” she clarified.
“Fine…ex-boyfriend,” I grumbled. “So what – you guys had some kind of bonding session, and you just opened up and told him everything?”
“Okay, first of all, stop making it sound trite. It wasn’t like that. He’s actually been asking me for a while if I’m dating anyone, and I’ve been ducking the question.”
“What do you mean, he’s been asking for a while? He’s only been out like a month.”
There was dead silence on the other end of the line, and I immediately realized that I had hit a raw nerve. Electra’s father – a former cape named Vir – had spent most of the last sixteen years in prison, albeit wrongfully. However, he had recently been paroled and was staying with Electra and her aunt. (One thing I had never told my ex, however, was that her father’s release was my doing; I had used up a special favor to get him out.)
“Let me clarify,” Electra finally stated. “He’s been asking since he was released. Basically, I admitted that there was a guy I liked, but the situation was complicated.”
“That sounds perfect,” I stressed. “Why couldn’t you leave it like that?”
“Because I don’t want our relationship to start off with me keeping stuff from him.”
“I get that, but you don’t tell him that your boyfriend is engaged. That’s ‘Dating One-oh-One.’”
“You’re not my boyfriend, and we’re not dating,” she shot back.
“In that case, it’s ‘Post-Dating One-oh-One,’” I countered. “However you style it, it’s not the kind of thing a girl tells her dad – not if she ever expects him to like the guy. Typically, fathers throttle guys over stuff like this.”
“Well, thankfully, I don’t have a typical dad.”
“What’s that mean – he’s going to garrote me instead?”
“Stop it,” she muttered, giggling. “Actually, he wants to meet you.”
“Huh?” I muttered.
“He wants to meet you,” she repeated. “It was actually the reason I was calling this morning, but the conversation kind of went off the rails, and you hung up before we could get back on track.”
I frowned. “But your father’s already met me.”
“Well, he briefly met a guy named Jim, but didn’t know that he was my boyfriend – at the time, that is.”
“Lucky me,” I mumbled.
“Anyway,” she continued, “how’d you like to come to dinner tonight?”
“If you’re talking about me and you, absolutely. If you’re talking about a meal with your dad, absolutely not.”
“What’s the problem?”
“Have you not been a part of this conversation? It’s a very bad idea.”
“Come on, Jim. You can’t be serious.”
“I can and I am.”
“Are you honestly saying that you don’t want to have dinner with my father?”
“Pretty much.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s going to be the most awkward and uncomfortable dinner ever. Why can’t you see that?”
Electra didn’t respond right away. There was just this stony silence coming from her end of the line that felt so complete that I had to check to make sure we hadn’t been disconnected.
“Don’t you want to get back together?” she finally asked in a soft voice.
My brow crinkled. “Is that an ultimatum?”
“Of course not,” she spat out. “You know I’d never do that. What I’m trying to say is that, if we ever manage to become a couple again, you and my father will eventually have to become acquainted. But at that point, you’ll forever be the guy who was afraid to have dinner with him. Do you really want that albatross around your neck?”
“I’m not afraid to have dinner,” I insisted.
“Then what is it?”
I reflected for a moment, then let out a deep breath and said, “Basically, the last few weeks have been almost drama-free for me. More to the point, I’ve actually enjoyed it to a large extent. Somehow, though, I can’t shake the feeling that dinner with your dad will be major drama.”
“How about this then?” she countered. “If it starts getting awkward, you’re free to leave. Just stand up and walk out, zip to the door, or just teleport. How does that sound?”
“‘Step into my parlor, said the spider to the fly.’”
“Excuse me?” she said.
“Nothing,” I griped. “Why is this such a big deal to you?”
There was silence for a second, then Electra seemed to come to a decision.
“Even though we broke up, I still care about you,” she admitted. “A lot. I just want the two most important guys in my life to like each other. That’s all.”
Of course, she wasn’t close enough for me to read emotionally, but there was a power and sentiment to her words and tone that almost anyone could have picked up on. And with that, I realized that I wasn’t the only one thinking dinner would be uncomfortable; it would be awkward for Electra as well, but she was willing to deal with it, because ultimately, she was doing it for us. She was doing it so that – if and when we reconciled – a disapproving father wouldn’t be an additional hurdle we’d have to clear.
Suddenly I felt almost ashamed. I had only been thinking about her dad’s
