All eyes seem to bounce between Freedom and myself, making me a little hot under the collar. Reflexively, I adjust my necktie and glance down at my food. I hate being the center of attention, especially at a family dinner. Even as I toy with my mashed potatoes, I can feel their eyes on me.
“How did that go?” Marissa asks, seeming very curious by the conversation.
“It went great! I sent Mrs. Hanson home to rest and spent Thursday and all of Friday there. I even got to help set up and greet people for a visitation that night,” Freedom adds, her eyes sparkling like the chocolate diamonds they are.
“And you didn’t kill each other?” Harper asks, a wide smile on her face as she looks my way.
“We live together,” Freedom reminds my family.
“Temporarily,” I add, even though I’m not sure why. I mean, yes, it’s a temporary situation, but it’s more than that. I actually seem to enjoy having her in my space, despite the fact she repainted and redecorated the living space. But it’s the flash of hurt that fills her eyes that gives me pause and makes me feel total guilt.
“Anyway, Sammy was super helpful and showed me all that goes into preparing for a visitation,” she tells my family over sautéed vegetables and potatoes.
“She asked me if I have to shave their balls,” I mumble, recalling the completely inappropriate conversation after I had Mr. Marton prepped for his visitation.
Everyone laughs.
“Total legit question, right?” Freedom asks Harper, who nods her approval. “The answer is no, in case you’re wondering,” she adds, telling the rest of the table.
“I’ll be able to sleep at night knowing my big brother doesn’t have to shave their balls,” Harper bellows, giving me a wink.
“So how was the honeymoon?” Kathryn asks as dinner progresses.
“It was amazing,” Harper singsongs, giving her husband a knowing look I don’t want to dissect. “I’m ready to go back.”
The way Latham gazes at her lets us all know he’s more than willing for a repeat trip. He takes a sip of his beer. “Me too.”
“Did Kate tell you she was selected to show some of her art in town?” Jensen asks, proudly grinning at his fiancée.
“What? That’s exciting!” Marissa boasts, echoing what we’re all thinking.
“It’s just a small showing,” Kathryn replies with a blush, waving her hands.
“No such thing,” Jensen says, bringing her hand up to his mouth. The sparkler on her ring finger flashes as the lighting hits it. “They’re wrapping up a display from an artist from New York City, and they’re eager to show some of Kate’s stuff afterward.”
“Kathryn, we’re so proud of you,” Mom declares with tears in her eyes. Kathryn and her mom haven’t had the best relationship, and Kathryn has really become close to Mom since she returned to Rockland Falls.
Kathryn tries to brush off the praise. “Thanks.”
“Do we get to go to a show or something?” Rhenn asks.
“Yes, the gallery is hosting an opening night gala after the first of the year. You’re all invited,” Kathryn says.
“Really? Like dressed up in fancy clothes and drink champagne?” Freedom asks, seeming to perk up at the idea.
Kathryn nods. “As soon as I have the details, I’ll let you all know.”
Conversation fills the room as everyone shares what’s going on in their lives. I’ve been here before—many times, actually—sitting around the dinner table and surrounded by laughter, and for the first time, I feel a part of it all. The conversation, the arguments, the merriment. I’ve always felt like an outsider looking in at these things.
But something has changed.
Glancing to my side, I realize what.
It’s Freedom.
Having her beside me, hearing her laugh and carry on with my family, fills a void in my chest. That hollow feeling is replaced with something else.
Love.
I realize, in the midst of everything, I’m falling in love with her. Hell, I probably have been for a while, just too stubborn and stupid to realize it. But we’re so different, you know? Oil and water, that’s us. Yet, here we are, coexisting at home and even working together the last two days. If I were being completely honest with myself, working beside her at the funeral home has been a bit unbelievable. She brings a sweet chaos to my calmness, and I didn’t realize I desperately wanted or needed it.
For the first time in my life, I don’t feel alone.
Guilt sweeps in once more. The divorce papers were delivered yesterday. Fortunately, Freedom was arranging some of the flowers that had arrived an hour before. I was happy to let her have the moment, knowing I was going to rearrange them as soon as she was done. Then, the carrier walked through the door and had me sign. The moment he left, I shoved the large envelope into my shoulder bag, where they still are today.
“You okay?” The woman I can’t seem to stop thinking about is staring at me, concern written all over her beautiful face.
“Oh, yeah. Fine.” Clearing my throat, I glance around and realize everyone is moving. The ladies are headed to the living room, while the guys are collecting the dirty dishes. “I’m going to help,” I add, reaching for the stack of plates in her hand.
“The girls are going to overshare and have margaritas on the back deck. I’ll see you in a bit?” she says, leaning in but then stopping herself. It’s as if she realizes what she is doing, but stops before our lips actually meet.
I stand up tall and nod, quickly making my escape to the kitchen. Rhenn is rinsing the dirty dishes and handing them to Jensen, who places them in Mom’s industrial-sized dishwasher. Latham is over scooping the leftovers into bowls, so after I set the rest of the dirty dishes down on the counter, I head over to help him.
“You’ve been working and living with Free, and you’re both still alive?” Latham breaks the silence in the kitchen.
“Well,” I start, clearing my throat. My hand moves up to my
