“But—” Frank starts, and then stops when he sees my face. I know what he’s thinking. What they’re all thinking as they look at me, worried and confused and torn.
But I made a vow to Finch that I would protect him, and I won’t break that vow.
“Georgie,” Frank mutters, and pulls me back inside the house. He knows better than to question my orders in front of anyone else. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”
“It was Finch who drugged me last night, and the guards.”
“No way!”
“Way. With, I might add, your wife’s pills.”
Frank does his best to change the topic of conversation from Celia. “Well, shit, if Finch is part of all this, get hold of him later and teach him a D’Amato lesson. But right now we should get to Tino’s, protect our Boss, and deal with the fallout later.”
I shake my head. “I don’t know exactly why Finch did this, but he’s loyal to me. He is,” I insist at Frank’s skeptical face. “And you know how I know?” Normally I wouldn’t bother explaining my thought process to Frank, but I need him on my side, fast. “Because he’s still wearing his wedding ring. If Celia ever decided to fuck you over, what would she do?”
“She wouldn’t,” he says obstinately. But then, slowly, he nods. “I guess she’d take off her ring and leave it for me to find. But Georgie, you can’t know that for sure.”
“I do know that for sure, because I also know where Finch is right now. I have eyes on him. And here’s the thing, Frankie, he’s sitting pretty at your apartment, paying an early-morning social call to your wife.”
Frank looks confused. “But Celia said…” I just look at him. His mouth turns down. “Dammit,” he sighs. Then, alarmed, “You sure you can trust whoever you got on him? What if he’s actually Fuscone’s guy?”
“It’s not a matter of trust. But we do need to get to them. I want both of them with us while this battle is going down.”
“But Tino…” Frank trails off, torn.
“You really think the two of us are gonna turn the tide in Tino’s favor? Half the Family will be there to protect him.”
“And half won’t,” Frank points out darkly.
Just a few months back, I’d be at Tino’s side in a heartbeat. But the rest of the night has come back to me, including Tino’s bombshell. Even now I half-think I must have dreamed it, but I know it’s true. It makes too much sense.
“If it makes you feel better, Frankie, Tino told me last night my first priority should be Finch. So we have special dispensation. Happy?”
Frank is not happy, but he quits being an obstacle. I know deep down he’s the same as me; his loyalty lies with his own family over the Family. His priorities are me and Celia—and Finch.
When we come back out on the stoop, Marco is still hovering there, although the guards have disappeared.
“I gave you your orders,” I snap at him.
“Boss, I’d rather come with you if you’ll let me. Finch—I mean, Mr. D’Amato—well, he was my responsibility.”
I study his face. “I don’t blame you for this, Marco. You weren’t on shift last night. Besides, Tino ordered all available men to him.”
Marco nods. “I get that. But I’m your man, not Tino’s. I’ll go where you tell me. If you think you could use me—”
“Alright,” I say, cutting him off before he starts getting emotional. “Let’s go.”
I meant what I said—I don’t blame Marco. I might not be sure why Finch did what he did last night, but I have more than an inkling. And if he walked out because he overheard me denying my love for him, I’m the one to blame.
I need to find him. I need to tell him that I do love him, that I’m crazy for him, that I’m sorry I ever thought I should hide it or deny it or try to fight it.
And then I need to protect him.
Chapter Thirty-Six
FINCH
I left the townhouse last night with no real plan. But I’ve gotten so tired of being an emotional punching bag for my whole life: for Pops, for Maggie, now for Luca…
Enough.
It wasn’t hard to dope everyone; I used that handful of pills Celia pushed on me during our shopping spree. They were still in my pocket from that day, if a little dusty.
Luca was especially easy, just throwing back the drink as soon as I offered it. And I’ve been such a model prisoner, I think those night guards might even have let me walk out the front door without putting them out of commission. I’ve been kind to them over the weeks, offering them coffee at night to help keep them awake. Only last night I added a little something extra.
I want Luca to know that despite what he thinks—what they all think—I’m still my own agent. I make my own choices.
I’m certainly not some helpless princess in a tower.
I drugged the whole goddamn lot of them, and I sauntered the few blocks into Central Park and went down to look at the Alice in Wonderland statue, wondering whether it was time to jump down a rabbit hole of my own.
I could disappear. I love this City and I know it in my bones, just like I know my man.
I’m not a man who loves, he’d said.
I’ll admit it stung to hear. But I also knew it was a lie, and I knew then why he told it to his Don, and it just made me so fucking exasperated, I figured I should remind him who he’s dealing with.
So, like I said, I drugged everyone and I bailed.
I knew better than to wander Central Park all night or try to sleep there, so I had to find somewhere else to spend the night. The obvious thing to do was go clubbing, because they’re open all night. I was greeted like a friend by all my old dealers,
