‘I think he might have PTSD. Do you know what that is?’
Barb nodded. ‘Nat’s ex-husband suffered from it.’ Barb looked at her, clinging to her hands, her gaze pleading. ‘Have I done the right thing? Helping him to hide it?’
Prita had heard the stories of what Nat had suffered at the hands of her mentally ill husband, so she understood Barb’s worry. ‘Every person is different. Every trauma is different. What one person handles someone else doesn’t or can’t. Some people suffering from PTSD are highly functioning, while others—like Nat’s ex—just aren’t. But I’m no expert. He really needs to go and see a psychologist if he wants help.’
‘He won’t. He’s genetically wired to put on a brave face and not share his burdens.’
Prita sighed. ‘He’s not alone in that. It’s a particular problem for men. Despite all the changes in society, they still feel they have to be strong and they’re not good at sharing their feelings.’ She learned that from her dad when her mother died.
‘Flynn wasn’t like that when Anna was alive. He shared everything with her. They were a team.’
Prita chewed her lip. ‘Maybe his trauma is still making him be a part of that team, except now, it’s a team of one, not two.’
‘What can we do?’
Prita couldn’t help but shrug. ‘I don’t think there’s much we can do unless he asks for help. We could try and force the issue, do an intervention kind of thing, but that doesn’t always work the way it’s supposed to. It can make people dig more into themselves.’
Barb clenched her fists in her lap. ‘That would be the case with my boy. If we confronted him, he’d deny it even more and then go flagellate himself about letting others discover his perceived weakness. It’s why I haven’t brought it up with him, I’ve just tried to keep him away from having to deal with fires, covering for him with others and getting Reid and Nat and some of the others here to volunteer with the CFA and be available for callouts so Flynn wouldn’t feel he had to.’ She twisted her hands in her lap. ‘But I feel like we’re in for a bad summer. Three fires in a few days. It’s not good.’ She took Prita’s hand. ‘Will you help him?’
‘I’ll try. As his doctor—’
Barb shook her head. ‘No. Not as a doctor. As a person. As a friend. As a woman who was able to distract him from his own panic with a kiss. I know you’re attracted to him, just like he’s attracted to you. And I know you both have your reasons for thinking you can’t pursue it.’
‘I don’t think I can’t. I’m married. I—’
Barb jerked her hand a little, stopping her words. ‘I know your marriage isn’t a real marriage.’
Prita gaped at her before removing her hand slowly and surely from Barb’s light grip. ‘How could you know that?’ If Flynn had said something … But no, how could he? There hadn’t been the time.
‘Oh, don’t look like that. Nobody’s been talking out of school. It’s just a matter of putting two and two together. If your marriage was a real marriage, if you loved your husband and he loved you, if you wanted to be with him, he’d be here with you. You’d talk about him rather than keeping him secret. You’d organise weekends to go spend time together if your jobs are what keeps you away. What does he do, by the way?’
‘He’s a photographer and is also a massage therapist.’
‘See, two things he could do anywhere, so there’s no reason he wouldn’t be here with you unless the marriage wasn’t real.’
Prita closed her eyes for a moment, trying to order her thoughts. ‘How did we get into a conversation about my marriage?’
‘You are using your marriage as an excuse to not live your life.’
‘I’m living my life. I’ve got a beautiful son and have started my own business.’ She faltered. ‘Well, I had my own business.’
Barb waved her hand. ‘And you still do. There are too many people in this community now who love and respect you to want to see you walk away. But that’s beside the point.’
‘It doesn’t feel very beside the point to me.’
‘We were talking about you and your not-real marriage and how you’re using it as an excuse. Maybe you have valid reasons for that and maybe you don’t. But either way, it’s an excuse and believe me when I tell you, excuses never lead to happiness. They only lead to unhappiness.’
‘I’m not unhappy. And we were talking about what we can do to help Flynn, not my state of happiness or unhappiness,’ she said desperately, trying to get the conversation back onto a footing where the next step wasn’t going to send her crashing into some emotional abyss.
Barb smiled at her, the kind of smile that made Prita feel like she’d just walked into some kind of a trap and she was yet to see it, let alone spring it. ‘You can help Flynn. The answer has been staring me in the face and I failed to see it until now.’
Prita was still not seeing the trap but was pretty certain it was about to slam shut on her and she should back away right now before she got stuck. And yet, she couldn’t make herself do it. Asked instead, ‘What are you talking about?’
Barb’s smile widened. ‘I think it will be more fun if I let you and Flynn figure that out for yourselves.’
The trap was hovering, but if she ducked and dived, she could still escape unharmed. Possibly. Self-preservation had her standing and backing up a few paces this time. She’d never noticed before how scary Barb could be. It was the all-knowing-all-seeing glint she got in her eyes. It was unnerving. ‘I do want to help him,’ she said, taking another step back.
‘I know.’
‘I’ll read some books and maybe call some colleagues to see if there’s a way
