She’s fine. Back in school. Tara
He had sent her a text that morning, letting her know that he made reservations at The Italian Garden. He had offered to pick her up, but she’d insisted on meeting him there. It was the smart play, but he’d miss the extra time going to and coming from the restaurant to get to know her. He had asked about Colleen, hoping she was better.
He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. What the fuck am I doing? There was something about her that called to him. Her calm voice. Her understanding. Her undemanding acceptance. Yeah, but I just wanted to spend some time with her to find out more about the shelter in the clinic, not get fucking involved with her—or her daughter. Jesus, I’ve never even dated someone who had a child. But he could not deny the desire to get to know her better.
He squeezed the back of his neck, trying to ease the tension as he thought of what he had to do the next day. She had mentioned she generally did not get to help with the lunches and hoped he would be able to talk to some of the volunteers outside, staying out of her sight. The worry that she would blame him, thinking she was being used, stayed in the back of his mind. No, she’s practical. She knows that anything we talk about could be used. Still, his gut churned.
Tara quietly shut Colleen’s door after checking to make sure her daughter was cool and sleeping. Whatever she had must have been a twenty-four-hour bug because her daughter was back to her happy, bouncy self.
She enjoyed the quiet, never minding having a little time to herself. Settling on the sofa with a glass of wine, she felt restless. There was nothing on TV and she had no interest in starting a new book. When her phone rang, she grabbed it quickly, anxious for the distraction.
“Hey, Sis.”
“Erin, how are you?”
“I’m good.”
For her sister to call this late, she knew she must have something on her mind. Erin’s twin, Rory, had immediately jumped into volunteering at one of the fire stations in Hope City and started paramedic training. He had reconnected with old friends and was quickly making new ones. Erin was still struggling in her effort to reacclimate into civilian life.
“What’s on your mind?”
“I was wondering if you thought the clinic next to Ever Hope would be willing to take on a volunteer.”
Tara leaned forward and set her wine glass onto the coffee table. A strange mixture of concern and excitement moved through her, but she wanted to make things easier on Erin to talk to her. “Uh… I’m not sure, although I think they do use volunteers. What exactly are you thinking, honey?”
“When I got out… out of the Army, I wasn’t sure I wanted to use my medic training anymore. I just… I don’t know… didn’t feel like a healer. But I can’t stay at Mom and Dad’s and keep hiding out like I have been. I was thinking about finishing my nursing degree.”
The warring inside shifted as excitement replaced some of the concern. “Oh, Erin, I think that would be a wonderful idea.” The two were silent for a moment before she ventured further. “I know something happened over there. You’ve opened up a lot to me, but you still have your secrets. And that’s fine. We all have those. I hope that in time you let me know more. But the fact that you’re starting to look forward is really good.”
A huge sigh of relief met her ears and Erin whispered, “Thanks. It feels good to finally make a decision. I’ve checked into the LPN program at Hope City Community College and they’ll actually give me credit for my medic training, so it won’t take as long for me to get through their program.”
“Do you want me to check at the clinic for you? Obviously, you’ll have to go in and talk to them and interview, but I can at least see what Dr. Tiller thinks.”
“That would be amazing, Tara. Thank you so much.” After a few seconds of hesitation, Erin added, “I love you, Sis.”
Her throat closed as tears clogged her eyes. “I love you, too.” Disconnecting, she leaned back against the sofa cushions and drained her glass of wine. The family had turned to her as a counselor to help Erin when she did not seem like herself. Erin had finally talked to her, but there were still secrets she kept deep. Secrets of things that happened in Afghanistan. And Tara knew that until her sister was ready to unburden herself completely, the secrets would remain hidden.
Exhausted, she headed to the kitchen and rinsed out her glass. Having already checked the downstairs security, she walked upstairs and into her bedroom. As soon as she was finished in the bathroom, she flipped off the light and slid between the soft sheets of her bed.
When Calvin left, she kept the furniture—except for their bed. She refused to sleep another night in the bed that she had shared with her husband. She had given him her love, her acceptance, and their child. When he turned his back on all that, she needed the furniture but wanted a new bed. She splurged on a king-sized, super supportive, and comfortable mattress. When it was delivered, she almost cheered when the delivery men carried away her old double mattress. It would have been nice if they could have carried away the bad memories as well.
She tossed from side to side, punching her pillow to find comfort, but her mind swirled. The residents of the homeless shelter. The needs of her job. The sack lunch giveaway the next day. Plastic sandwich bags. Bags with no fingerprints.
