Madison had explained to him that the kids losing their dad, and with their mom being who she was, it was something he had to be careful with.
It wasn’t like Sawyer didn’t get feeling abandoned. Even though he lost his mom in college, that anger he felt after losing her, blaming her for leaving him, he remembered it. Not to mention his no-show dad.
That didn’t stop him from worrying Ford would feel that way, like he wasn’t a priority. But to his relief, Ford didn’t seem upset. Sawyer tried apologizing after he’d finally gotten Callum down for the night.
“Don’t worry about me.” Ford placed a hand on Sawyer’s arm and smiled. “I had a lot of fun today. It was different, but interesting.”
Sawyer nodded. “I know it’s a lot to deal with. Hell, I’m still getting used to it.” He picked up a few toys from the floor and dropped them into the basket in his hands. “All the things you need to remember, the stuff no one can teach you no matter how many books you read...” He shook his head. “I’m still convinced I kinda suck at this.”
Ford took the basket from him, set it down, And Sawyer watched as he picked up a few stray clothes from Gavin’s adventures in nudity and placed them on top. “It’s a lot. I can see that first hand. You don’t have to worry about me so much right now. I understand.”
“Good. I just don’t want you to think that I’m going to abandon you again or something now that you’re here,” he muttered. “I shouldn’t have done that in the first place.
When Ford came back to him, he ran a hand down his back. “Lucky for you I’m patient and flexible.” Ford went up on the tips of his toes and left a kiss on Sawyer’s cheek. “Besides, we can talk once the kids are asleep. I’ll go and pour us a glass of wine.”
Sawyer didn’t understand how the hell he’d gotten so lucky. Ford put up with so much from him, and he was still willing to give more, to be there. He promised himself he would do something special for him. Ford deserved the world for being such a saint.
Gavin fell asleep on the couch after insisting he wasn’t sleepy at all, so Sawyer carried him into the room he shared with his brother. He considered waking Gav up to change into his PJ’s but decided against it, simply taking off his jeans and tucking him in.
When he made sure that Savie was in her room for the night, he finally took a deep breath before walking into his bedroom to meet up with Ford.
Ford had already changed into his pajama pants and was waiting for Sawyer.
“I didn’t see you with a suitcase.”
Ford turned at the sound of his voice, and Sawyer hurried over to Ford and pulled him into his arms. His boyfriend smiled and looked up at him.
“Nate brought it up and left it outside your door,” Ford said.
Sawyer drew in Ford’s scent and just held his boyfriend against his chest. “I swear, sometimes it’s an Olympic sport getting them into bed, but we are done, and I’m all yours.”
Ford pulled back so they were looking at each other. “You never have to apologize for being good to them. It makes me love you more.”
Sawyer pulled Ford back with him till his legs hit the back of the bed, then he lowered himself, but kept Ford standing. Sawyer wrapped his arm around Ford’s stomach and looked up at him. “I’ve missed you.”
Sawyer kissed his way down Ford’s stomach and then traced a finger along that little trail of hair that dipped into Ford’s pants, enjoying the quickening of his boyfriend’s breathing. He stopped short of touching his cock, simply tracing the pattern of it and the insides of Ford’s quivering thighs.
When he looked up, Ford’s eyes had turned dark with arousal.
Ford lowered his head and kissed him. Fuck, he’d wanted to do that all day, but it never seemed to be the right time The softness of it sent relief coursing through Sawyer’s chest. He’d missed just touching Ford. The feathering lightness of his lips made everything okay. Ford’s breath hitched, and his body pressed forward. Sawyer wanted to rip off the pajamas he wore and grace every inch of his skin with those same kisses in return.
“I missed you too,” Ford whispered, stroking the side of Sawyer’s chin. “We need to talk.”
Well, that was a boner killer.
Sawyer rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. Yeah, he’d seen this coming, even though he tried not to panic. Ford said they were fine. Sawyer tapped the bed beside him, and Ford stepped out from between his legs and sat down.
He took Ford’s hand in his, but wouldn’t look him in the eye. “What’s on your mind?”
“You… you’re on my mind… always.” That had Sawyer looking, and he found Ford’s eyes on him. “Always.” Ford leaned in and brushed a soft kiss on Sawyer’s lips, and he melted into him, letting go of the last of his worries as Ford pulled back.
“But...”
“But?” Sawyer's eyes widened.
Ford chuckled. “It’s not a bad but.”
“That’s what he said.” Sawyer tried for levity.
Ford cracked a smile, but carried on. “You are everything. I love you, and that will never change.”
Fuck, this was not good. The next thing Ford would say would be, “It’s not you, it’s me.”
“It’s just that, these kids, they need stability. They need you.”
“They need us,” Sawyer interrupted. He didn’t know what magic Ford had, but Savanna had stayed with them for about an hour and had actually spoken more than four words.
Ford smiled. “I was going to say hopefully they’ll come to need me too.”
Sawyer nodded emphatically. “They will.”
Ford chewed on his bottom lip. “You can tell me to stop being pushy, but I
