A disappointed groan swirled around me and the pain in my stomach squeezed harder.
“No surprise. Probably have to get back to the castle and feed the monster,” someone yelled.
Laughter erupted around me as I searched the faces for whoever had the gall to say the words to my face.
“Excuse me?”
Dormand stood up, his tree-trunk arms flexed tight at his sides. “What is it, Your Highness? You didn’t think we bought that story you tried to feed us today, did you?”
“It’s not--”
“Isn’t it though? The servants are talking. They’ve heard the screams and the growls in the castle. They’ve said entire wings have been locked down.” His fingers curled one after another into fists, then released and clenched again. “And no one has actually seen the king in days. How do you explain that?”
“My father is sick. And I’d watch your tone, or I could have you charged with treason.”
Mr. Takka leaned over the bar, his finger pointed sharp at Dormand then me. “I don’t want any trouble in here, gentlemen.”
Dormand’s eyes looked past me, a deeper level of disgust creeping into his stare. “Charge me if you want, but everyone else will know the truth--you’re hiding something. We deserve a real king who doesn’t lie to us.”
“Enough!” Kalmin kicked the stool back and stood, his hand slamming into the Dormand’s chest.
Finally. I knew I could always count on him. We’d been friends for too long, too many years for him to abandon me completely. I’m sure he’d just been scared like everyone else. I’d forgive him.
“Falls--” he crossed his arms over his chest and widened his stance, his eyes raking over me, “--I think it would be best if you left.”
Every nasty word I’d ever heard collected like venom at the end of my tongue, but Kalmin’s crestfallen stare sliced through me, cutting me into pieces until I could only nod in response.
I turned and left, a few mumbled comments following me out into the night. I slammed the door behind me and threw myself against the wall beside the entrance. My head banged against the stone and I actually invited the pain. Maybe the ache in my head could smother the one burning in my chest making it hard to breathe.
“Bad day?”
My head fell to the right. Veda stood next to me in her somber gray tunic, a book clutched tight to her chest.
“Yeah. Not my best.”
“I heard.”
Of course, she had. I’m sure everyone from here to Skyla had heard about it by now. I sighed, letting all the tension out of my body and collapsing flatter against the stone wall. “I looked for you at the castle today, but you weren’t there.”
“You did?” Her voice lilted up. “Why?”
I closed my eyes and tipped my head up, letting the night breeze wash over my skin, wishing the sky would open up and swallow me.
“I figured you would want to be there to watch me fall on my face. Apparently, you’ve always known I was bound to fail.”
“Ouch. Sounds like it was worse than the gossip around town is saying.” She slid her book into the bag across her shoulder and crossed her arms. “Besides, I wouldn’t want to see you fail. I might be critical, but it’s because I think you have potential.”
“Can you please not use that word? I’m starting to hate it.”
She nodded and mimicked my defeated posture against the wall.
“What are you--” I glanced over and she smiled.
“Looks ridiculous, doesn’t it?”
“Are you seriously making fun of me right now?”
“No.” She straightened up. “It’s just that it’s not the end of the world. I’m sure it was awful, but if you spend all your time worrying about what you’ve done, you’ll never have the energy to do better in the future. So stop feeling sorry for yourself, and get over it.”
“I…” I peeled myself off the wall and jabbed my finger in the air toward her, but the rest my argument caught in my throat, denying me the satisfaction but watering down my anger. “Why is it that you get to say these things to me and I keep letting you?”
She shrugged, a mischievous grin cracked upon her face as she raised her thick left eyebrow. “Because deep down you probably already know it’s what you need to hear.”
“Maybe.”
Or maybe I enjoyed the punishment. Either way, the tension in my muscles eased and I took a deep breath. Veda nodded, seemingly satisfied at dragging me out of my pit of self-loathing, and I couldn’t help being drawn in by her shrewd knowing smile until I grinned back. Her hair whipped in the wind and she pulled her arms tighter against her body. I reached to remove the few stray strands that fell across her face, but she beat me to them and tucked them behind her ear. I looked down the street, trying to drop my awkward floating hand with some sort of grace, but she chuckled low and I knew I’d failed. Apparently, I’d lost all my charm along with my reputation.
And then I laughed. Hard and loud, from deep in my gut. The whole evening blurred into a ridiculous kaleidoscope of scenes and snippets that had all culminated into a hopeless prince cowering under a streetlamp.
“See. Isn’t that better than smashing your head against a wall?”
“Yeah. Thank you, Miss Macario.”
The door creaked in its frame behind us. I jumped and wrapped my arm around Veda’s waist, rolling us both around the side of the building. I peeked around the corner, the voices of the jerks from the bar echoing stupid and drunk into the night, but fortunately in the other direction. I exhaled and glanced down. Veda’s eyes widened and her mouth hung open, my body pinning her against the wall, her heart drumming hard against my sleeve.
Taking a step back, the levity between us disappeared in the dark.
“I’m sorry.” I grabbed the back of my head and looked at the ground, kicking the uneven cobblestones.
