“Ma’am, I do not see a need for further action at this time.” He studied the location of the car in the field and appeared to be making a guess at where the car left the road. We heard the sound of boots on gravel again and turned to see Russ and Jodie headed our way. “Ma’am, would you mind taking a seat in my car?”
“But I thought you said – “
“Ma’am, please.” He popped the door open, motioned me inside, and closed it behind me.
The Deputy held up his hand with his palm extended. “Now, Russ …”
Russ approached the car and slammed the palm of his hand on the roof of the car above me. “What the hell were you doing?! You and your little freak friends almost got Jodie killed. I don’t give a shit what you want to do, but don’t do it around my daughter!”
“Daddy!” Jodie looked mortified.
“Keep your faggot, transvestite drinking buddies away from my little girl! You got that?!” His eyes were wild with anger and fear. He wiped a string of saliva from the corner of his mouth. “In fact, just stay the hell away from her! She was better off before you got here! Way better off!”
“Russ, I think it’d be better if you just go ahead and take Jodie home now and cool off, maybe stop by the hospital if she wants to go, just to be sure.” The Deputy walked Russ back a step.
“I swear to God!”
I thought he might start screaming again, but Russ hung his head, took Jodie by the elbow, and walked to their car. Deputy Stinson stayed with me until Russ and Jodie left and headed towards town.
“Thank you,” I said meekly when Deputy Stinson opened the door and let me out.
“Russ’ll be okay in a few days. If you want my advice, stay away and let Jodie handle it.”
He motioned for Chloe and Benj, who were practically sober now, to join us. “Are you sure none of you want to get checked out? I can call Medical Response or take you to the hospital clinic.”
We all looked at each other and shook our heads. Deputy Stinson advised me to call the insurance company, and then he took a statement from each of us and wrote out a crash report. He called on his radio to have a towing company sent out. All three of us sat in the police car and watched the deputy walk down to where I hit the deer, check the area, and take some pictures.
The Deputy walked back to us. “Did you find the deer? Is it ok?”
“Yes, I found the deer and it is deceased.”
“Crap! I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hit it.”
“Ma’am, it wasn’t your fault. You did a great job of keeping your passengers safe. Your car could have easily flipped and rolled over. It’s just bent metal and they know how to fix that.”
“He lightly touched my arm and I felt like all the blood drained out of my body.”
When the tow truck got there, Deputy Stinson rode with the tow driver down to the car, took pictures of the car’s exterior and interior, and rode with the tow truck back up to the road where we were waiting. The tow truck driver gave me a card and was on his way. The chassis looked bent, and the car’s body had dents and scratches all over it, including a smashed out left headlight and a bent right wheel.
“Okay, Ma’am. Do you have someone to come get you, or do you need a ride home?” I halfway considered walking, but he was nice enough to give us a ride.
When we got to the house, I let Frodo out, used the bathroom, and went to bed without changing clothes. Although I wasn’t mad at either of them, I didn’t have anything left for Claire or Benj. It was 3:45 a.m. and I lay staring at the ceiling for over an hour, wondering what in the hell I was going to do to fix me and Jodie.
June 17, 2013
Yesterday, I slept like a brick until ten but stayed in bed until noon. When I got up, Benj had let Frodo out, collected eggs, and fed the dogs (he even remembered to lightly feed the meat birds), and Chloe was out picking up coffee and sandwiches. Benj had rebounded easily from the night before and looked like a magazine ad in an Aeropostale tank top and cargo shorts. But he was quiet, and to his credit, stayed out of my way.
I normally do something with Jodie on Sundays, but I was not about to push my luck. A text I sent her around mid-morning had gotten no reply, so I grabbed a bowl of sugary cereal and slurped it down.
When Chloe got back from the store, she was unusually silent. They planned to leave after lunch, but she was worried about me and wasn’t sure whether they should go. After several reassurances, a few I tried to believe, they finally loaded up and drove away. I went back inside and collapsed on the couch. I don’t usually wallow, but everything caved in on me at once. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore.
About five, Frodo asked to be let out, and I forced myself to get eggs, wade through the remaining doomed chickens, and check on the baby chicks. They would soon be ready to escape their shrinking brooder space, thus the Doomsday chickens had to go tomorrow. I dumped their water, which was full of poop and pine shavings, and refilled it. I thought about their future and
