Odin grimaced and then gave me an annoyed look that seemed to ask; why do we put up with him? I shrugged and traced away. It wasn't bad advice.
Chapter Forty-One
“Any ideas on how we counter his speed?” Odin asked as we came out of the tracing room and headed into the dining room.
“You didn't get him?” Fallon growled as he stood.
All of my Intare were waiting in the dining hall; cups of coffee and the remnants of a meal before them. Lions ate when they were anxious. I think it's our instincts; our body translates anxiety into a portent of harsh times and tells us to stock up.
“No, we didn't,” I gave them the bad news. “He's gotten faster, and he doesn't leave a trail.”
“I wish you'd taken us with you, Tima,” Lucian said.
“I don't think it would have made a difference,” I said gently. “But I'd welcome your help in coming up with another plan.”
“Why can't you just wish it all away with your star-heart?” Aidan asked.
Ever since I'd ended Ragnarok by accessing the power of my Trinity Star, it had seemed as if I had an unbeatable weapon inside me. I'd been told—by the Consciousness of the Void and of Faerie—that I simply had to believe in my star and direct its energy to use it. However, the Star was its own entity. Like my unborn son, it lived inside me and it was composed of pieces of me, but I was beginning to see that it wasn't actually me. The Star had its own agenda, and although part of that included protecting me, it had priorities that differed from mine. And rules; it had rules.
The most irritating rule was that it wouldn't help me change something that was fated to be. Unfortunately, I never knew what was meant to be and what wasn't. I'd been working with the Star on accessing its power, which, in addition to unifying my magics and souls and making me stronger, was a connection to the Nine Great Magics. Through meditation, I'd learned to sense when the Star was willing to help. A little tingling would occur in my chest. I hadn't felt that tingle around Katila so I was fairly certain that the Star would be staying out of this fight.
Another annoying rule was; the power had to be used for the greater good. That stung. Not because I didn't want to foster the “greater good” but because that term had always seemed so trite to me. A lot of humans who call themselves witches (and usually aren't) say that magic can't be used for personal gain. Well, what's the point of that? Why have power if you can't use it for yourself? That being said, it was probably for the best that something so all-powerful as the Trinity Star had some limitations. Absolute power corrupts absolutely and all that. Those rules might actually be in place for my protection.
But damn; it would be nice to just wish my problems away.
“You know she can't use it like that,” Azrael answered for me. “It has to be—”
“For the greater good,” Aidan said the words with the same irritation I felt for them. “Yeah; we know. But isn't it for the greater good to have Vervain safe?”
That had been one of my arguments with Al, the Consciousness of the Void. He said that sometimes I needed to experience things that would make me stronger; blah, blah, blah. I guess Katila was meant to make me stronger. Or to make me Queen of Hell.
My face went slack as that sobering thought occurred to me. Could Katila have been right? Could he have actually been sane—before I got to him, that is? I blinked and realized that it didn't matter. I didn't care one bit if Katila was fated to rule Hell with me beside him; he wasn't going to. I wasn't going to. There was no way that was for the greater good, and even if it was, I didn't give one dancing demon damn. I wasn't going to let Katila kill my family. If the Star had a problem with that, it could find another woman to inhabit.
Something flared inside me, and I suddenly felt at peace. No; this wasn't about Katila's fate; it was about mine. The Trinity Star was with me; it fought for me even when I wasn't aware of it. It guided and guarded me in subtle ways. If it didn't help me with this, it was because it knew that I could handle it on my own. I had to trust it because if I didn't, it would stop working altogether. Or worse; it would turn against me. And I didn't want to be enemies with something inside me; been there, done that.
“Vervain?” Odin asked in concern.
“Sorry; just have a momentary crisis of faith,” I said. “I'm fine now.” I looked at Aidan. “I wish I could control it more, but the Star functions under knowledge that it can't share with me. I have to trust that it knows best. It will help when it can, but right now, I'm on my own.”
“You're never on your own, Carus,” Azrael said. “We're all with you, and the Trinity Star must find us to be acceptable.”
“Exactly,” I said with a smile. “So, let's not disappoint it. Any ideas on how to lure Katila into making a fatal mistake?”
“Vervain?” Athena hesitantly walked into the dining hall.
“Athena?” I stood up. “Are you all right?”
“Yes; I just needed to speak with you,” she stammered as she looked across the collection of stunning men.
Athena had seen my Intare before, but I believe it was only during battle. They can be a little intimidating when you meet them all together; so many beautiful men in one
