“He's just a baby, Trevor,” I protested.
“A baby who was smart enough to use his faerie essence to find his mother in the Dream Realm,” Trevor insisted. “Who told him how to do that, Minn Elska? No one. I assume that he heard about the Dream Realm from you, but you didn't teach him how to access it, did you?”
“No,” I whispered.
“Brevyn has knowledge that Ull didn't. I don't know if it's his premonitions or if it's his magic or even his fey essence, but Brevyn is wise beyond his years. Honestly, he made me feel a little inadequate.”
“What? Why?” I gaped at him.
“Because he saved you,” Trevor said. “He reached you and motivated you to fight when I couldn't.”
“Trevor, he wasn't the only one who reached me.” I shifted Vero to my other breast and then leaned forward to take Trevor's hand. “The blood worked. I experienced your memories. I felt what you did. You haunted me; the real me. You sank beyond the evil and touched the good beneath. You kept me strong. Without that, I don't think I would have made it long enough for the children to reach me.”
Trevor sighed deeply and squeezed my hand. “It was hell, Minn Elska.”
“I know. As I mentioned; I experienced it.” I gave him a little smile.
“You didn't see it all,” he said grimly. “You didn't see the violent arguments and the desperation. You didn't see the sleepless nights I spent trying to lose myself in the bottom of a bottle. It was torture, Minn Elska. I was so angry at the Wolf that I couldn't even shift and find relief in that.”
“I'm so sorry, Honey-Eyes,” I whispered.
“I would go through it a thousand times just to see you sitting here in front of me, nursing our son.” Trevor leaned forward and brushed a tender kiss across my lips.
“How about we just never do that again?” I asked as he pulled away.
Trevor chuckled softly. “It's a deal.”
“And do me one more favor, Honey-Eyes.”
He lifted a brow.
“Forgive the Wolf,” I said gently. “I would have left either way, and he was right to protect Vero from me.”
Trevor sighed deeply but didn't answer. He just lowered his stare to Vero. I let it go. I'd fought my internal battle, I couldn't fight his.
Chapter Fifty-Three
“Toby?” I shouted as I knocked on the front door of his villa.
The Tuscan-inspired home looked a little strange within the arms of the forest, but Toby loved it and that's all that mattered. It was his first home; the first place he had lived in all by himself. His twin brother, Naye, lived in a cave high up on the mountain that loomed to my right. They had lived together before I came along. I hoped Naye was there now and not inside the villa with Toby. The last thing I needed was the Sun God adding his bad attitude to the mix.
“Tobadzistsini, you open this door right now!” I slammed my fist on the door again. “I'm not leaving until you talk to me!”
A barking came first, followed by heavy footsteps, and then the door opened inward. Eyes bloodshot and hair wild, Toby looked as if he'd spent the entire night drinking. Or crying. Or both.
“Toby,” I whispered.
“Go away, Vervain,” Toby said brokenly. “The least you can do is give me some peace.”
“Toby, I didn't do this to hurt you. You knew there was a possibility that I might—” Doba jumped up on me excitedly. “Hey there, sweetheart.” I scratched her head as I looked up at Toby. “You knew there might be more men someday. This is how I live.”
“Yes, Vervain, I know. I understand, but I've also realized that my parents were right.” Toby gently pulled Doba down. “I'm not mad at you anymore, Vervain, but I can't go back to you. I can't live like this.”
“I thought you were okay with it?” I stuttered. “The lioness magic should have helped you. Maybe you need to spend the night with all of us again. Maybe—”
“Vervain”—he grabbed my upper arms—“stop. I love you. I will always love you. But love isn't enough this time. I want more than you can give me and no spell is going to change that. If it did, it would be changing my free will, and I don't think you want that.”
“No,” I whispered. “I don't want to force you. I just... we've been through so much, we fought so hard to be together and now, you just want to walk away?”
“That's the problem.” Toby sighed. “Our fight never ended. It never will end. It's always something. Some god or spirit or even fate coming to mess with you. Someday, I may be able to fight at your side again, as your friend, but I can't right now. I need to move on and to do that, I need you to go away.”
“You mean; you need to get over me,” I said dejectedly.
“You gave me your blessing once, Love Goddess,” he said gently. “Do you remember what you said?”
“That was a long time ago. Back when I thought you were lost to me.”
“Do you remember, Vervain?” Toby asked again.
“May you never have to look far for love,” my voice shook. “May it always find you.”
Toby smiled, soft and sad, and then pulled me into a hug. “Love will find me again, I'm sure of it. Please let me go so I can recognize it when it arrives.”
“Okay,” I whispered into his thick hair. “If that's what you want, I'll let you go. But you'll always have a piece of my heart.”
“A piece isn't enough, Vervain.” Toby kissed my
