He didn’t say anything right away. “I’ll text you later, okay? If you still want to go to the Hut, then you know I’ll be there.”
I turned to walk in when he called out my name, causing me to glance back at him. His lips wavered as he watched me for a moment. “I’d go against Lauren, Evan, and whoever else I needed to if it meant you were okay. You know that, right?”
“Of course.” Why would he even ask that? Just because the frat party happened, didn’t mean I blamed him. I wasn’t even mad anymore because rationality overtook any irritation I had for him disappearing.
Ren nodded once.
“Theo knows it too,” I added, though unconvincingly. Theo did know Lawrence would do anything to make sure I was okay. He just refused to admit it because he preferred hating on Ren instead.
His lips pinched. “I doubt that, Del, but thanks for trying to make me feel better.”
I gave him a small smile, one of reassurance even though he didn’t need it. “He trusts my judgment even when he shouldn’t. If I say you are good people, he knows it. As for fighting people for me…” The laugh couldn’t be stopped at the sight of him facing off Lauren. Ren had muscles, but he just didn’t have the vigor that Lauren did when she meant business. “I don’t doubt you could take Evan, but Lauren…”
He flinched. “Go get creative, Del.”
I stuck my tongue out at him before disappearing into my happy place. The door clicked behind me, letting me exhale the breath I’d been holding knowing I was on my turf. Nobody could take this away from me, judge me, or tell me I didn’t look right while doing what I loved.
The canvas I was met with had an acrylic version of the sketch I’d been working on at the warehouse, but it shifted. The two faceless figures were intertwined in a warm embrace, ballet flats on polished dress shoes, with their arms around each other. It was soft, the colors muted, but the tone something far louder.
I called it “Safe Space” because that was exactly where I was when I was in Theo’s arms.
March passed in a blur of monotony that I welcomed. Classes flew by, the work wasn’t hard to complete, and nobody said anything about my father. The silence was what I needed.
It was the beginning of April when the rain showers hit, and normally I liked watching from the living room window, but my mood had dulled over the past week considering it was the three-month anniversary of my father’s death. I went on with my life as I should have, but closed myself away because pretending all day was too tiring. Ren understood to some degree, only checking in on me occasionally after I left campus, and never asked me to go to parties because he knew what I’d say.
I was curled on the couch with a throw over my bare legs and the History Channel on the television screen when my phone rang. A clap of thunder rattled the windows, causing my focus to go to the glass to watch lightning strike and light the darkening sky. When my cell rang again, I pulled my gaze away from the downpour and back to the screen to see Theo’s name flashing across it.
He started in as soon as I hit accept. “You didn’t go to Sophie’s.”
“Most people start a conversation with hello and how are you,” I pointed out tiredly, laying back down on my side.
He didn’t hesitate. “You always go to her house on Sunday, and I know what today is. Even if she were on your last nerves you wouldn’t leave her on her own to handle things.”
Closing my eyes, I shifted my knees up until they were tucked by my chest, so I was balled up. Of course, I’d felt bad leaving Sophie alone, but I knew she’d be okay. She’d have brunch, day drink, and drown herself in town gossip by phoning her friends. If I honestly thought she’d need me, I would have sucked it up and went. “I don’t feel well, that’s all.”
“Do you need to go to the doctor?” The alarm in his voice warmed my chest, but also burned my cheeks considering what I had wasn’t some contagious illness he needed to fret about.
“No, it’s nothing serious. Just, uh…” Biting into my lip, I winced and tried figuring out how to explain that it was just my period sucking the life out of me one cramp at a time. The stress of Dad’s death anniversary only fed the typical migraine that accompanied my menstrual cycle, so I’d been drugged up in the dark all day trying to get rid of it while listening to whatever was on TV.
“Ah.” His throat cleared, seemingly in understanding. “Are you all right?”
“It’s not the end of the world, Theo.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“I’ll call Sophie later to see how she’s doing, but I’m fine. It’s been a hard week. I won’t act like I was okay throughout it.”
He mumbled a curse. “I should have made time to check in on you. I knew—”
“I’m not your responsibility,” I cut him off, even though I knew he’d argue. He made it his responsibility to worry, and sometimes I enjoyed it. It made me feel like I was on his mind, but not in the way I wanted.
“Since when?”
I thought to all the times he’d taken care of me when my parents were busy saving the world and building a future for us. I looked up to them and all they did for others, but there were times I wish they’d done more for me in their time on earth. It never hit me until I had to see them both buried, hearing hundreds of people give their condolences and assuring me what amazing people they
