She opens her mouth and then closes it.
“Please, speak your mind, little one.”
She clears her throat. “Lucy told me that she didn’t really have a childhood and that’s what appeals to her. She gets to be the little girl she never was. I’m not like that.”
I smile again, hoping that my calm exterior is putting her at ease. “That’s one type of little. There are so many reasons why women prefer to live as young girls. Sometimes it’s the opposite. For example, some women really enjoyed their childhood and want to relive it.”
Her eyes widen again. “That might be more like me.”
“Perhaps.” I’m holding back. She’ll figure out for herself what her reasons are in time.
Sabine tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, and I watch it spring right back, trying not to chuckle at her effort. I wonder how many times in her life she’s wasted her energy trying to tame her hair back.
Her auburn curls are loose today. She doesn’t even have a clip. I love her hair. It’s gorgeous. I also can’t wait to restrain it.
“Tell me more about you, little one.” I hold my position, still slowly stroking my chin, not moving more than necessary so she won’t spook.
She tugs her hands out from under her thighs and folds them in her lap. “The truth is that I have everything I could ever want. I have a sizable trust fund, which is why I haven’t been in a hurry to find a job.” She cringes. “That’s rather embarrassing and pitiful isn’t it?”
I shake my head. “Not at all. You just graduated a month ago. You’re still trying to find yourself. If you have the means to do so, you’re entitled to take the time.”
She draws in a breath. “Anyway, that’s how I ended up here. I’ve been thinking about writing a book. The idea is probably far-fetched, but I thought if I researched various aspects of Abby’s life, I might get inspired and learn enough to write a story.”
I unfold my legs and lean forward, putting my elbows on my knees. “So you’re planning to write about the BDSM community? That’s what all the research is for?”
She shrugs. “Maybe.”
“Admirable. Have you been taking notes?”
“Yes. I have a journal. I’ve been writing in it every day. Rambling mostly. But I’ve noted everything I’ve learned so far each day.”
“Good for you. I’ll expect you to continue that process then. Daily.” I lift a brow.
She nods. “Yes, Sir.”
I pause a moment and then continue questioning her. “How many boyfriends have you had?”
She shrugs. “A few, Sir.”
“Anyone serious?”
“I thought so. Apparently, they didn’t.” I can hear the frustration and rejection in her voice. Interesting.
“They broke up with you?”
She nods. “Ironically, I’m bossy and domineering.”
I chuckle. “Maybe you weren’t meant to be bossy and domineering,” I suggest. “You won’t be that way under my roof. I’ll be bossy in this relationship. You’ll be demure and obedient.”
She lifts her hand and chews absently on her thumbnail again. It must be a nervous habit. When combined with her wiggling, she looks very young. I don’t think she realizes it.
I stare at her for a few moments, rubbing my chin with two fingers, letting my last words sink in. “Is this going to be a problem?”
She lowers her hand. “I don’t know, Sir. I can try?” It’s comical how her voice lilts like she’s asking me a question.
“I suggest you do more than simply try. If you’re going to immerse yourself in the lifestyle of a little, you’ll miss out on all the fun parts if you end up spending all your time being disciplined.”
She nods, but that thumbnail comes to her lips again.
“Stop biting your nail, Sabine,” I reprimand, mostly to gauge her reaction. I’m setting a bar though. Now that I’ve made this decision, I’ll need to stick to it.
She jerks her hand away from her mouth, probably unaware she’d even been biting her thumbnail to begin with. “Yes, Sir.”
“Would you like to get started?”
She draws in a sharp breath but nods. “Yes, Sir.”
“How about if I show you your room? You can change and come back downstairs.”
She nods again. “Okay, Sir.” Her voice is wobbly. It’s expected.
I rise and reach out a hand to her. She grabs it and lets me help her to her feet. I find I like the feel of her smaller palm in mine. It’s warm from her sitting on it. Soft. I instinctively lift it to my face and rub her knuckles against my cheek.
It’s been so long since I’ve let myself experience this kind of intimacy, and I probably shouldn’t be doing so with Sabine, but I can’t help myself. I’m drawn to her. If I wasn’t, she wouldn’t be here. I need to watch myself, though. This woman is far too inexperienced for the likes of me. Even if she realizes she enjoys the life of a little, that doesn’t mean that I’d keep her.
I’m doing this experiment for two reasons. One is to get my friends off my back because they’re right. I need to put myself out there again. Two is because Sabine intrigues me. She’s cute and sexy at the same time. I want to know what makes her tick. I’m curious enough that I’ve made this commitment.
But it can’t go beyond this trial. She’s far younger than me and has her entire life ahead of her. She should find a man who’s closer to her age with his entire life ahead of him.
I can certainly work with her for a few weeks, help her discover her kink, but anything more than that is out of the question. No matter how well this goes, I must set her free when the experiment is over. Training a little is a lot of work. It would take months to mold her to my liking, assuming it was even possible. Assuming she would want that
