I keep thinking about Dax.
The kiss.
I kissed him.
Oh god, I’m a terrible person.
“Waverly?”
Suddenly, someone is holding my shoulders and shaking me. I blink to see Alarick kneeling in front of me. Somehow, I’ve backed myself against the front door. When did I move? What’s happening?
“Waverly, I need you to look at me. Focus.”
I look at him, but when I focus too hard, it feels like I’m going to be sick. “Alarick?” I sob, and then I start to cry.
I cry and I cry.
“It’s okay. You’re safe here. You’re safe. It’s okay.”
“Hey, Waverly, have a sip of this.”
Briella?
I see Briella kneeling down in front of me too, her face gentle. I’m here. I’m safe. These people would never hurt me.
“What happened to you?” Alarick asks.
“I don’t know,” I wail. “I don’t know. I think they drugged me. I climbed out the window and . . .”
“Someone is out there wavin’ around a flashlight!” Kendric hisses, suddenly appearing in front of me too. Was he here before? I don’t know.
“Fuck,” Alarick growls. “They’re lookin’ for her. Waverly, you need to tell us what happened.”
“I climbed out the window. They’re going to come for me . . .”
“We have to send her back out,” Alarick says, standing. “If we don’t, they’ll tear this goddamned place up lookin’ for her and our cover will be blown.”
“You can’t send her out there, Alarick. Look at her; she’s going to be tortured. They could do anything to her. She’s not going back.”
“If we don’t send her back, he’s goin’ to fuckin’ come after her.”
“No,” I cry, standing. “No, please don’t send me back out there, Alarick. Please don’t. Please.” Panic grips my chest.
He can’t send me back.
“Dax ain’t goin’ to hurt you, Waverly,” Alarick says, his voice calm. “He’s not, and you know it. Go out there, he’ll take you to your room and you can sleep it off.”
“No,” I screech.
“They’re comin’ up the driveway, Alarick,” Kendric calls.
“Fuck, she’s gotta go back out or everythin’ we’ve been doing will blow out of the water and Dax will get the fuck away . . .”
“No,” Briella cries.
“No please,” I lament.
“Fuck this.” Mykel growls. “Turn the fuckin’ lights off, lock the door, and don’t make a goddamned sound. Now.”
Suddenly, he’s grabbing me. I’m crying hysterically, so he plants a hand over my mouth and drags me down the hallway. I kick and scream and squirm, but he hangs onto me so tightly I can’t move. He takes me into a room, and before I know it, my back is on a bed and his big body is looming over mine, his hand firmly over my mouth, his body stopping my frantic thrashing. “It’s okay,” he says, his voice so calm. So. Calm. “It’s okay. You need to stop screaming. I’m not lettin’ you go back out there. Not yet. It’s okay, but I need you to be quiet. Can you be quiet, Waverly?”
Be quiet.
Be quiet.
I can be quiet.
I nod, and tears roll down my cheeks. Mykel’s finger brushes over one. I don’t know how he knows it’s there because it’s so dark, but I do know that it makes me feel so much better. He keeps his hand on my mouth and I fall silent, even though my heavy panting fills the dark room. Just outside the window, occasional flashes of light can be seen. Someone bangs on the front door, but the house is quiet.
They’re all hiding.
They did as he asked.
They didn’t send me out there.
I close my eyes, not wanting to see the light. I hold my breath, just waiting for this to blow up. Mykel’s hard body is covering mine, and even though he’s heavy, he makes me feel safe. I feel like nothing can hurt me right now, and I need that.
Mykel slowly releases the hold on my mouth, and when his hand slips away, I make a soft, sobbing sound. “It’s okay,” he tells me, his voice the kindest he’s ever used with me. “It’s okay.”
“I’m afraid,” I whisper. “I’m afraid.”
“It’s goin’ to be okay.”
A few minutes tick by, and finally, the door opens and the light flicks on. Mykel lifts his body off mine. Alarick and Briella standing at the door. “They’re gone, but she’s gotta go back. If she doesn’t, they’ll return. I know you don’t want to, honey, but you have to.”
I nod, swallowing my tears.
I made a vow to do something. I will follow through with it.
“I’ll make you something to eat and get some water into you to help you feel better before you go back,” Briella says. “Okay?”
I nod again and look to Alarick. My mind is still spinning. My body feels weird, and everything feels crazy. “He kissed me.”
Everyone goes silent. Mykel tense behind me. His body is still close to mine.
“Dax?” Alarick clarifies.
I nod. “He kissed me, and he said I make him feel different. He told me about his life. I think he has feelings for me.”
“I fuckin’ told you.” Mykel growls. “You gotta pull her out of this, Alarick. It’s fuckin’ dangerous.”
“We’ll discuss that tomorrow when she’s sober. For now, we need to get her back so suspicion is not raised.”
Mykel helps me to my feet and I glance up at him. I don’t realize that I’m staring at him for so long until he clears his throat and I shake my head, awkwardly. “I’m sorry,” I say softly. “I . . . thank you.”
He nods, and then leaves the room.
He doesn’t like me, yet he just risked a lot for me.
He helped me when I needed it.
My heart aches as I watch him go.
I look to Alarick. “Why doesn’t he like me?”
Briella sighs and walks forward, placing her hands on my shoulders. “Let’s get you some food, yeah?”
Right.
Let’s do that.
Let’s avoid reality once more.
Let’s just eat a meal and pretend everything is okay when we all know it isn’t.
“DAX?” I
