“I don’t believe that, Maggie. Do you know why? Because of Oliver. That kid has more heart than anyone I know, except for his mother. Where do you think that came from?”
Maggie shook her head. “I’m not sure he got that from me. I’ve been so afraid, Finn. Afraid of taking chances. Afraid of the sky falling in.” She shrugged. “Just plain afraid. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I get really anxious sometimes worrying about things that are out of my control.”
He reached out and squeezed her mittened hand. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone has fears. We all worry. Give yourself a break, Mags. You’ve been through a lot. That takes a toll on a person.”
“You’re right. It does,” Maggie said. “I don’t like the feeling of things being out of my control. But the reality is, life often is unpredictable.”
“I get it. When my grandfather got sick I felt as if my world had tilted on its axis.” He bowed his head. “My emotions were all over the place. Fear had me in its grip. I knew there was nothing I could do to keep him in this world and it made me panic. I ran away from the pain of losing him. In the process, I cut myself off from all the people I loved and who loved me in return.” Finn cleared his throat. “I didn’t get to say goodbye to him. Fear cost me that moment.”
She reached out and placed her hand on Finn’s knee. “I’m sorry you missed saying your final farewell to him. There was so much love between the two of you. I hope you’ve been able to hold on to that.”
“It’s been easier to focus on the good memories ever since I returned. Now that I’m no longer running I can finally breathe a little easier. There’s something about being back home that’s been healing in a lot of ways.”
Maggie looked at Finn as surprise washed over her. She felt the same way about being in Love. There was something so special about this heartwarming Alaskan town. “Honestly, I’ve felt different ever since I stepped off that seaplane. I feel braver than I’ve felt in years. And hopeful.”
Finn nodded. “Hope is a wonderful thing.”
They locked gazes. “I’ll tell you a secret, Mags. You were my first crush,” Finn admitted.
Maggie let out a squeal. “Really?”
“Yes, ma’am. I used to wonder if you were crushing on me as well.” He wiggled his eyebrows at her. “So? The moment of truth has arrived. Were you?”
Maggie ducked her head down. Her cheeks felt flushed. She shouldn’t be embarrassed. This was Finn. Her childhood pal. But with his soulful green eyes and rugged good looks, Maggie was having a hard time keeping him strictly in the friend zone. Adrenaline did tend to course through her veins whenever he was in her orbit. As children, her feelings for Finn had been strictly platonic.
“To be honest, no, Finn. It wasn’t until much later that I developed romantic feelings for anyone. I think I was sixteen. A late bloomer, I suppose. I think being around my mother made me wary of developing feelings for anyone. After all, she chased anything with a pulse. It didn’t make for a very stable childhood.” She met Finn’s gaze head-on. “But I’ll tell you one thing, Finn O’Rourke. I thought you were the best thing since sliced bread. You were the most impressive, courageous and wonderful boy I’d ever met. You showed me how to run freely and embrace everything the world has to offer. And you didn’t treat me differently because I was a girl. You taught me not to be so fearful. And you changed me for the better. Every time I left Love I felt stronger and more confident. I owe you a debt of gratitude for that.”
Finn placed his hand over his heart. “That means the world to me. I thought about you long after you left Love for the last time. I kept hoping you’d come back. But you never did.”
“I thought we would come back too. When we left here that last time I never knew it would be twenty years before I came back to Love.” She quirked her mouth. “My mother fought with Uncle Tobias over her lifestyle. He wanted us to stay in Love so I could have a stable upbringing.” She shook her head as bitter memories rose to the surface. “She was always chasing the next best husband. So instead of coming back here we moved to Arizona, then California and New Mexico before heading to New England.”
Finn let out a low whistle. “That’s a lot of moving around.”
Maggie nodded. “It was rough. That’s why I want Oliver to stay rooted in one place. Stability is important for children.”
“Is your mom still around?” Finn asked.
“Yeah, she’s living out in Las Vegas with a new husband. We’re not close. There’s no getting around it. My childhood was a train wreck.”
“That’s too bad,” Finn said. “I guess both of us were going through a lot of dysfunction at the same time.”
She squeezed his hand tightly. “I feel bad complaining when you lost so much.”
Finn looked at her. A bittersweet expression was etched on his face. “Pain is pain, Maggie. It’s hard to compare battle wounds. And you don’t have to feel bad about anything. It’s all right to feel whatever you’re feeling.”
“On a good day my feelings are all over the place,” Maggie admitted.
“That’s what I admire most about you. Your ability to be open and honest. So many people have a filter. You’re genuine, Mags. You always have been.”
Maggie felt her cheeks flush at Finn’s compliment. Their faces were so close together and Finn was gazing into her eyes with such a tender look.
