“W-what are you doing here?” he asked in a low voice. Even though he wanted to kick his father out on his ear, he didn’t want to do anything to hurt sales or ruin the grand opening of Keepsakes. Maggie had worked tirelessly to pull this off. So far, they were knocking it out of the park.
Out of nowhere, Declan appeared at his father’s side. “He’s here for you, Finn.”
Finn felt a stab of betrayal as he locked gazes with Declan. He’d known his father was going to show up here today! And he’d allowed Finn to be blindsided. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so disappointed in his brother.
Finn swung his gaze around the store. Maggie was looking at him with wide eyes. He quickly walked over to her. “I need a few minutes. Can you man the cash register?”
She bobbed her head. “Of course. Take as much time as you need.”
He made his way back to his father and brother. “We can’t do this here. Let’s go in the back room.” Without waiting for an answer, Finn strode toward the back of the store and down a small hallway. He jerked open the office door and stormed inside, followed by Colin and Declan.
He felt as if steam was coming out of his ears. This was Maggie’s grand opening. It wasn’t the time or place for his father to show up out of the blue.
He scowled at his brother. “Declan! What did you do?” His question came out like a ferocious roar.
“I did what needed to be done,” Declan said, his expression unapologetic. “I reached out to him.”
“Son, we need to talk and it needed to be face-to-face. Man-to-man. I’m not leaving until we air things out.” Colin’s voice was firm, brooking no argument.
Finn let out a bitter-sounding chuckle. “Now? After all this time?”
“You’re right,” Colin said, shaking his head. “We’re way overdue. And I apologize. To both of you. I bailed on our family. There’s no excuse for the things I’ve done. Back then I didn’t have the tools to talk openly to you about your mother’s death.” He winced. “Honestly, I’m not sure I do now.”
Anger rose up inside Finn. “You’ve been gone in one way or another ever since then.”
“Finn, I know there’s no excuse, but my heart was broken. I’m not strong like you and Declan. And to make matters worse, it was my fault.” Agony rang out in his voice. “She was my best friend. The very best of me. And when she left us, I crumbled. I lost sight of everything I held dear.”
Maggie’s face flashed before Finn’s eyes. How would he feel if through his actions Maggie was taken from this world? He couldn’t even imagine the utter devastation.
Colin frowned at him. “Declan told me you’ve been blaming yourself all this time,” his father said.
Finn gritted his teeth. “I put the bullets in the shotgun. I went against everything I’d ever been told by you and Mom in our household.” He wiped away tears with the back of his palm. He let out a groan. “Boredom set in while I was home alone. I put the bullets in and then I shot off a few rounds in the backyard. I’d lined up some cans and I wanted to see if I could hit them.
“I kept telling myself to take the bullets out so I wouldn’t get in any trouble, so no one would know what I’d done. But I forgot. And then that night you were in the backyard joking around. The gun went off. We lost our whole world. Because of me.”
“And you never said a word, did you? You bottled it all up inside you and let it fester.” Declan’s face looked tortured.
“No. How could I?” he asked in an agonized voice. “I didn’t want to lose the rest of my family. I didn’t want all of you to hate me.”
“So instead you hated yourself.” His father’s words hung in the air like a grenade. Finn had never thought about it like that before. It was true. He had been struggling with feelings of poor self-worth ever since.
Finn hung his head. He didn’t know what to say. How could he put into words the guilt of a child over something so monumental? How to put into words the devastation of having your father unravel and leave the family who had so desperately needed him?
His chest tightened. “We lost so much. It was a lot to bear.”
“You are not responsible!” Colin said in a raised voice. “No matter what you think you know about that night, you’re wrong.”
“You need to listen, Finn,” Declan said. “Just listen.”
“At the time I was as honest as I thought I should be about that night. You two were so young I didn’t want to overwhelm you with the details. I didn’t know it would be important.” Colin raked his hand through his hair. “I never imagined you would blame yourself, Finn. How could I when I was the one at fault? Finn, you know how meticulous your mother was to detail. Cindy was like a bloodhound.” Colin let out a sharp laugh. “Much the same way as she knew when you sneaked freshly baked peanut butter cookies from the tray, she knew you’d been playing around with the shotgun. That same day she emptied it when she realized what you’d been doing when we weren’t home. We were planning to sit you down and talk to you about it, but then—” His voice trailed off.
“She died.” Finn’s voice sounded flat to his own ears.
“Yes, Finn, she passed. And there’s not a day that goes by without my thinking of her. Mourning her. And wishing I’d never refilled the shotgun with bullets. Your mother and I had just enjoyed a wonderful night. We had dinner out at The Bay, then we came back here and drank some wine and a few beers. I was joking around with her about finally
