“Yeah, he told me that. He had also added to it over the years.”
“What’s on there?”
“You don’t know?” She raises a brow.
“No,” I shake my head, “should I?”
“I’m going to go grab my laptop, I’ll be right back.” She gets up and leaves the room. I can’t help the feeling that comes over me. My body flashes hot and my stomach starts to churn. What the fuck could be on there? And why does it feel like she’s questioning me?
“Okay.” She comes back in, “I’m going to warn you, some of this shit isn’t pretty. I also found other stuff in that fucker’s office that we will have to go through together but first this.”
I just nod because right now I can’t seem to find my voice to speak. She loads up the laptop and inserts the USB. It takes a few minutes but the window finally pops up with a list of files.
“Let’s start with this one.” She clicks on a file and a list of names comes up. “These are a group of men who are into the same shit Coach Halbert was.”
“What?” I breathe out and lean forward. “Who?”
She turns the laptop so I can read them myself. Some big names are on this list and a few of them I know very well since they were at my house and in meetings with my father on a regular basis. The ones that stick out the most? Andrew Cox-elementary school principal, Wilson McKay-local fire chief, and Joseph Watkins-local judge. These three men were in my house at least once a week before my father died. The rest of the list I either only know in passing or not at all.
“I know those three," I point out the three I recognize to her, “they spent a lot of time at my house with my father.”
“I figured.” She nods. She closes the list and clicks open the next file. “Here is a list of cops who could be paid to look the other way or even assist in cover ups, for the right price.”
I lean over and look through the list and I see police chief Bill Moore on there, it makes a lot of fucking sense. No wonder Coach Halbert was so fucking brazen in the shit he did and these other people too. If some of the highest officials were turning their cheeks then who was there to fucking help the helpless?
“I paid him off to ‘convince’ the fire chief that Halbert set that fire with his cigarette.” She finger quotes convinced. “It was really easy.”
The sick feeling in my stomach magnifies as I think about all the children that needed help at the hands of these sick fuckers and didn’t receive it. She clicks over to the next file which is named ‘Babies’. When it opens, there are about ten couples on that list but I only recognize one and I feel my heart racing.
“Georgina and Abe Hinton.” I read out loud.
“Is that…?”
“Yeah,” I nod. “That’s Adrianna’s parents. What does this file mean? What’s ‘Babies’?”
“I have no idea about this one.”
“We have to figure it out.” I stress to her as my head begins to pound.
“We will.” She places her hand on my arm, “we have a whole list to work with here.”
“Ember, why would you think I knew about any of this?” I question her.
“Because of this last file.” She clicks open the last file and I feel like I have lost all feeling in my face and my mouth is suddenly very dry.
‘The Whitsborough Rapist’. Something jogs in my memory, it’s dancing just around the edges but I just can’t get a good grasp on it.
“Trav?” I hear Ember’s voice but she sounds so far away.
Today is my thirteenth birthday and I got to celebrate it with Coach and my baseball teammates. We had a game this afternoon and we won, it just added to the happiness of my birthday. I also have a plan to meet up with Adrianna after and go get some milkshakes at The Route. The locker room is deathly quiet because I am the last one here and I always help Coach clear up our equipment.
I strip out of my filthy uniform-I slid into home base three times today-and wrap my towel around my waist. Coach has started to give us more space in the locker rooms due to the guys complaining about privacy. I know he can be a bit much but they just don't understand it like I do. Coach has selected me as his confidant and he tells me everything about how he's training us to become our very best. And he really wants us all to become something and maybe make it out of this town. But I will never get to leave, I will just become my father and take over his business. Whitsborough is my prison forever and my mother and father are the jail keepers.
I turn on the hot water for the shower and step inside the steam. My muscles hurt on my arms and shoulders but it's a good hurt, it reminds me that I can always hurt more, especially at the hands of my father. I lather up and wash away the dirt remnants on my body, watching as the grit runs down into the drain.
I know he's there, I can always feel when he's watching me. I don't say anything because at least he no longer records me. As messed up as it sounds I know he does it because he cares about me. If it weren’t for Coach, there would be a lot of shit I just wouldn't know about myself. Things about my changing body that would've worried me if I didn't have him to ask about it.
I'm not stupid, I know some of the shit we do is wrong but I am loved in a way I have never been and I don't want
