Something occurred to me then, something that hadn’t occurred to me before. My feet stopped walking, and I nearly caused half a dozen other students to walk into me as I darted off the sidewalk to get out of the way. My Vans hit the grass, and I watched as Mason followed me, grinning at the students who’d smacked into him during his sudden change of direction.
He smiled at everyone else the same way he smiled at me, didn’t he? He wasn’t doing anything special for me. No. No way. That just wasn’t possible.
“Mason,” I started, not feeling nearly as courageous as I should be to ask what I was about to ask. I couldn’t let this, whatever it was, continue, unless I voiced my worry, my concern—and my concern was whether or not I was being played.
Never thought I’d have to worry about that, but I guessed what they said was true: there was a first time for everything. It could be that Mason just wanted into the freak’s pants. He was a guy, after all, and guys were all about sex.
He instantly knew something was up. His brown eyebrows furrowed, and he looked at me worriedly. “What’s wrong? Did I do something? I know I might seem over the top sometimes, but I—”
“That’s not it,” I said.
“Is it because I asked about your date?” he guessed. “If you don’t want me to talk about it, I won’t. I just—”
I knew he would go on and on unless I stopped him and told him exactly what this was about, so I cut in, “Why are you doing this?”
That made him stop and give me the most bizarre look I thought his face could muster up. “What are you talking about? Why am I doing what?”
“Why are you acting like…like you want to be more than partners? Like you care about my dating life and what I do on my weekends.” The more I rambled, the crazier I sounded, I was well aware. “Like you’re jealous that I have a date tonight?” When I saw the expression on Mason’s face, I instantly stopped myself from saying anything more.
The way he stared at me told me I could not be more off-base, that everything I’d said was completely and utterly wrong.
“Oh, God,” I whispered, taking a step away from him. “I’m sorry. I totally read too much into it.” If I could’ve smacked myself, I would have. I knew better than to put more weight on things. I knew better than this. “Forget I said anything.”
I hurried away, mostly because I was so embarrassed I felt my cheeks flaming. I really wished I could go home and bury my face in my pillow, pretend, just for a few hours, that the world outside didn’t exist, that Mason and Calum were not my problems, and that everything was normal.
Who knew talking to attractive guys would make my mind get so jumbled? I felt like an idiot. The worst idiot around. Ugh.
I made a diagonal across the grass, wanting to rush away from Mason and the crowd on the sidewalk and find a nice quiet place to clear my head before my next class started. I didn’t make it far before a firm, warm hand wrapped around my wrist, pulling me back and forcing me to stop, a hand whose fingers were thick and strong, able to fully wrap around my slender wrist, and then some.
Do not look back, I told myself. Do not look back. He’ll just give you a pitying look because you assumed something totally wrong. I did not need to be on the receiving end of a look like that to know I’d fucked up.
“Bree.” Mason’s voice was soft, tender, and, in spite of the fact I knew I shouldn’t, I found myself looking over my shoulder and meeting his brown eyes. “Stop,” he said, slowly releasing his hold on my wrist.
I brought my wrist to my chest, rubbing it absentmindedly, wondering why his hand on me had felt so good…almost like Calum’s cheek kiss.
He stuck his hands in his pockets, taking a single step towards me. “Can I be honest?” He paused, only for a moment, before adding, “Can I be honest without you freaking out again?”
Uh, that might not be something I could promise him. Knowing me, freaking out happened all too easily. Nothing about my life was easy, so I didn’t know why I thought I had everything under control. I should’ve known something would happen eventually—I just didn’t think more than one thing would happen at once.
Calum. Mason. I couldn’t handle one of them. How was I supposed to juggle them both, along with faking a general happiness to be alive?
“Sure,” I said, though I knew I didn’t sound believable in the least.
“You…you might be right,” Mason slowly spoke, never once breaking eye contact, as if he couldn’t. “I am a little jealous that someone else is taking you out tonight…for the second time. If I’m completely honest, I only wanted to be your partner so we could spend more time together. There’s something about you, Bree. I don’t know what it is, I don’t know why I care so much, but I do, and I can’t change it.”
I couldn’t breathe. I could not breathe at all as I listened to Mason talk. He sounded utterly serious, and yet…he couldn’t be. He couldn’t really be jealous, he didn’t really want to spend more time with me. There was nothing fun or special about me to merit any sort of jealousy or wanting.
“Everything I did and said was to spend time with you,” Mason went on. “You might think you’re boring, but you’re not. You are worth it.”
I wanted to
