‘Good night, Miss Smith,’ Marina said, embarrassed by her father’s rudeness. ‘Thank you so much for all you’ve done for us. My father and I are extremely grateful.’ She pulled Paddy up from the floor. He stretched and then looked up at Marina hopefully. She was going to ask if she could take another piece of pork for the dog, but Miss Smith had already turned away.
28
Aman in uniform appeared and indicated that they should follow him. Marina and her father stepped out of the warmth of the hut. The sky trembled above them. Marina wanted to link arms with her father and help him along in the snow – he was limping slightly – but his sullen mood made her draw back. Paddy sniffed the air and yowled.
‘Where are your dogs?’ Marina asked, looking around.
‘Miss Smith will no doubt look after them,’ her father muttered.
‘Father, are you in pain? Should you ask to see the medical officer again?’
‘That’s one person I’ll be happy never to set eyes on again. But if I do, I’ll make sure to knock his block off.’
They trudged across the compound. Men were loading crates on to sledges. Horses with thick blankets thrown over them waited patiently to pull them away. Searchlights swept across the snow. A siren went off and Marina heard the sound of drilling.
The door to a small hut was unlocked. The man stood aside for them to enter. The room was very different from the cosiness of Miss Smith’s quarters. But then, thought Marina, Miss Smith had not expected guests. Perhaps those two narrow metal bedsteads with bare mattresses and thin grey blankets rolled up was all that was available. Even after the man lit an oil lamp, the room looked as bare as a cell. Would Miss Smith’s room be so sparsely furnished? Marina wondered.
Left alone, Marina’s father sank down on the bed. ‘Why didn’t you do as you were told, Marina? Why didn’t you stay on the Sea Witch?’
‘Because Finchin gave the order to leave. Brown had pulled up the anchor and the Chief Engineer had started the engines. Finchin was leaving you.’
‘He was following orders.’
‘But what good is that if it means he leaves you to freeze to death?’
Paddy whimpered and lay down on the floor at the Commander’s feet. He put his head between his outstretched paws and looked up at Marina, as if he, too, was anguished at what she had just said.
Marina knelt down and put her arms on her father’s knees. ‘I couldn’t stay on the boat knowing you were missing. I know what it feels like to be left alone, and I didn’t want you to ever find out.’
‘Oh, I know what it’s like to be left alone, Marina,’ he muttered.
‘But now we’re together. We’re here. We’re safe. And Miss Smith won’t let anything bad happen to us!’
He raked his hand through his dishevelled hair. ‘Oh, what’s the use? It’s all finished.’
A chill clutched at Marina’s bones. What was her father talking about?
‘But Miss Smith has rescued us.’ Her heart raced. This was not how she imagined her meeting with her father would be. He should have hugged her and told her he loved her and that he was proud of her for being so brave. Surely no other girl would have made a sledge and followed their father across the ice shelf? Marina felt very small and very stupid. Would her father never be proud of her, whatever she did? Miss Smith had seen that she was talented and brave. Miss Smith said that they were friends and hinted that Marina could be her assistant even though she was so young. Why could her father not see how special she was?
‘I thought I could keep you safe and happy and well,’ he said. ‘I couldn’t do that for your mother, but I thought I could do it for you. And now . . . now . . .’
‘Don’t worry, Father.’ Marina stroked the arm of his sweater. The wool had come unravelled and it was damp. ‘I’m quite safe now I’m with you. It’s just that you’re so tired after your journey. Why don’t you lie down and sleep? And then, when we wake up, Miss Smith will help us get home.’
Her father said nothing; he seemed lost in his own thoughts. And then, without warning, he lay down on his narrow bed, facing the wall.
‘You’re right, Marina,’ he said, quietly. ‘Forgive your poor father. I forgot how this place makes a man feel. Memories of another mission. Hopes for the future. It all gets into such a muddle in my mind. My body aches all over. I’m so tired. I’ll have forty winks . . .’ He yawned. ‘Yes, I’ll just have a nap, and then when I wake up, everything will seem very different.’ He pulled off his boots and put them neatly by the bed. Then he lay down once more, pulling the thin grey blanket over himself.
‘Marina?’ he whispered. ‘I’m sorry I haven’t always been the best of fathers. I’m sorry I’ve spent so much time at sea. But things will change. I promise.’
‘Father?’
‘Yes?’
‘What happened here all those years ago?’
He took a while to answer. Marina curled herself up at the bottom of his bed.
‘I had read about this land in a book I found in the library when I was a student.’ His voice was calm and quiet and made Marina think of the time she’d had chicken pox – she’d been allowed a fire in her bedroom and the Commander, on a rare trip home, had read stories to take her mind off her itching skin. ‘It told of a land so far north it had been forgotten. I wanted to see that world made of winter for myself. I wanted to see the waters of an ancient sea so deep that it had been drowned by ice . . .’
Marina thought she could see her father, younger and less sad than he was now, sitting in a small hut with his
