Kevin, who rarely looked at her off air anymore, looked her straight in the eye and laughed along, ‘How could I not?’
Wanker.
After twenty-five years of performing together she knew subtext when she heard it.
Bloody ridiculous, he was saying. Only a simpleton would find that funny. If only their devoted fanbase knew the derision he had for them. The contempt. She’d read Wolf Hall, too. Didn’t mean she couldn’t find a gussied-up dolly dog adorable. In fact, of the pair of them, she was pretty sure she was the one with a handful more brain cells. Compassion anyway.
‘Maybe we should get Humphrey a jumper. Stacy?’ Kath waved to their producer in the galley. ‘Can we get a picture of our dog up? He’d look good in the one with pom poms, don’t you think?’ She winked conspiratorially at the camera.
Kev shook his head and gave one of those twinkly eyed wry smiles of his. The type that had won her over all of those years ago when he’d first held out a hand to her to dance. At the time she’d thought his cobalt-blue eyes held a hidden wisdom. An understanding of the depths of her soul. Now of course she knew that it was actually a finely honed ability to patronize without the recipient being vaguely aware of him being anything other than charming.
‘Just so long as you don’t try to put me in a matching one,’ Kev said in a way that implied he knew he’d end up in a matching one on tomorrow’s show. ‘I’m sure Humph is willing to go along with anything. What do you think viewers? Is our Kath mad enough to try and get me and Humph into the same threads?’
‘Listen to you!’ She gave his arm a play swat. ‘So down with the kids. You and your threads.’
Kev’s smile brightened, which meant she’d annoyed him. ‘Are you trying to say I’m an old codger, Kath?’ He always ramped up the Liverpudlian twang when he was trying to endear himself to the audience.
Kath feigned horror. ‘Never.’ She felt herself losing the invisible audience so she threw a wink to her husband. ‘You’ll always be my toyboy.’
‘Atta girl.’ Kev gave Kath’s knee a brisk pat and they both turned to the centre camera, expertly absorbing the next prompt on the autocue.
KATH: LEAD UP TO TEASER FOR CHARITY RIDE – TWENTY SECONDS
Kath’s heart tightened and her smile dropped away. ‘All of which brings us to a reminder about just how important it is to look after ourselves. Not just outside, but inside too.’ She tapped the side of her head, then her heart and folded her hands together on her lap so no one could see them shaking as she continued. ‘Some of you may remember I lost my brother, Ian, a couple of years back after he lost his battle with depression. Since then, I’ve become an ambassador for LifeTime – a mental health charity.’
Out of the corner of her eye she caught Kevin nodding soberly then suddenly unleashing one of his bright smiles. ‘I’m afraid that’s all we’ve got time for today. Don’t forget to join us tomorrow when we do a special on luggage. I know we’ll be needing an upgrade before we head off on safari in South Africa. And by safari, I mean a Cape Town wine tour! Save some Chardonnay for our Kath. Rowr!’ He clawed a hand at the camera then gave it a warm smile. Warm, now that he was back in control. ‘From all of us here in the studio at Brand New Day … we wish you an epic one until the next one … which we hope will be even better. See you again at six. Bye for now!’
Kath smiled, waved, ‘Bye all.’ Through gritted teeth she asked, ‘Why’d you cut me off?’
Through his freshly whitened smile, Kev used his old ventriloquism skills, ‘It’s bloody depressing, that’s why. No one gives a toss.’ He gave the centre camera one of those hand opening and closing waves that looked a little bit like a salute.
‘Bye all,’ Kath leant into Kev to give him a kiss on the cheek, their signature ‘close of show’ move. His cologne stung her nostrils as she whispered, ‘I’m leading with it tomorrow,’ then turned back to the camera and waved, ‘Buh Bye!’
Chapter Five
Sue loved her niece and nephew, but some days, like today for example, she wasn’t one hundred per cent certain she liked them very much. Which did tend to make things awkward.
This Thursday, much like any other Monday or Thursday afternoon, began with Sue’s phone pinging just as she’d turned off the security alarm inside the back door to Katie and Dean’s Tudor-style detached house in ‘one of the nicer villages’ outside of Bicester. She didn’t read it immediately because she didn’t need to. There would be a reminder of Jayden’s sensitivity to milk, wheat and a ‘suspicion’ about peanuts that they had not yet fully explored. (There was a doctor on Harley Street that had been recommended. He had such a long waiting list, but going to anyone else would really be a waste of time.) When she did glance at the text she saw there was an additional line. ‘Would you mind hanging on for a bit of a chat?’
Sue didn’t really fancy it, but, as Katie never asked her to stay once she’d whirled back into the house charged with another day’s high of recruitment successes, she thought she should make an exception. Perhaps Katie had realised she might owe Sue a bit of an apology for implying that taking time off for Gary’s funeral had put a spanner in their childcare plans. That, and Sue still had yet to begin to go through Gary’s things. The previous
