He couldn’t bear to stay where he’d see Bruce every day. See him and not be with him.
‘You’re not going, are you?’
‘I’m leaving tomorrow. It’s for the best.’
‘Best for whom?’
‘I thought you’d be happy. If I’m back in Sydney, we won’t get in each other’s way. There’s nothing for me here anymore.’
‘And what about me? Don’t I get a say?’
‘You said it all the other day. You can’t be with a liar.’
‘You’re not a liar, Gabriel. Liars hurt people and that’s not you. It’s taken me far too many years to realise the difference.’
Gabriel fingered the butterfly brooch on Mary’s gown. He’d wanted something bigger but though it was small, it was more intricate, more beautiful. An heirloom perhaps. It would sit over her left breast and hide her heartache. If only he could disappear into this world of make-believe and create illusions for others—and forget his own past and pain.
Bruce wasn’t about to stop. He sensed him getting closer. Gabriel refused to turn around. He curled in on himself, his chest concave so he could better protect his wounds.
‘When I found out about Dad’s other family,’ Bruce said, ‘he made me promise to keep it a secret because it would hurt my mother too much if I told her. Like an idiot I believed him. I kept his secret because he was too much of a coward. He was a liar.’
Bruce got closer and Gabriel forced himself to stay still, to stay tight.
‘Jason lied too,’ Bruce continued. ‘He never really wanted me, he just wanted to hurt you and to hurt both of us. But I was in his thrall and he crushed my heart until it was broken.’
Bruce was so close now Gabriel could have leaned back and fallen into his chest. Bruce’s arms would fold around him and he’d be home. He’d be safe.
Or that’s what he had once thought. He stayed still, stayed tight.
‘You …’ Bruce said. ‘You’re not like either of them. You’re not like anyone I’ve ever met or … or ever loved.’
That word lanced Gabriel’s heart and he winced.
‘I still can’t stay,’ he whispered.
Bruce’s hand touched Gabriel’s arm and gently encouraged him to turn around. His resistance wavered, craving more of Bruce’s touch. He wanted his hands all over his body, he wanted his mouth to kiss every inch of him and make him forget the past. He wanted one last goodbye, knowing that Bruce might not think him a liar any longer even if Gabriel could not stay in Brachen.
‘What are you running from? Your home is here.’ Bruce put his finger under Gabriel’s chin and tilted his head up. ‘Sofia would have wanted you to be where your talent could grow.’
Bruce smiled at him. That shine in his eyes was blinding. Gabriel freed himself from Bruce’s hold.
‘I’m afraid, Bruce.’
‘We all get scared. That’s how we know we’re doing something worthwhile.’
Or something foolish.
‘What did Sofia do?’ Bruce asked.
‘She sacrificed everything for me.’
‘And after that?’
He frowned. ‘I don’t understand.’
‘She followed her dreams and that’s why we’re here today. That’s why you’re here today. You don’t think she was scared too? Of course she was but she did it, and even in her last moments she was pushing you to do what she knew you were capable of.’
‘I’m not strong enough to achieve what she did.’
‘Like hell you aren’t.’
Gabriel walked away. He didn’t want to do this.
But Bruce grabbed his hand and forced him to stop.
‘Stay. With me.’
He looked from the hand holding him to the man holding him back. That was what he was more frightened of. That he and Bruce couldn’t make it work. They’d already tried and failed.
‘We can’t be together, Bruce. Every time I’ve tried to share the deepest parts of myself, people get hurt—including me. And no matter what I say, you’ll never trust me. Not after this. And I don’t want to fight the whole time to make you understand.’
‘You don’t have to tell me the truth because I already know it. What you did for me in bringing the town together to help clear my place, to pay their debts, I know, deep down to the very depths of my being that you would never hurt me. And I know, with no shadow of a doubt, that you love me. And I love you, Gabriel.’
His heart flinched, wanting to open fully and expand, but wary. Those words … He’d waited years to hear Bruce say them, never truly believing that it might be possible, that it was just a childish fantasy. But now the words had been offered, they felt right.
‘Do you mean it?’
‘Have you ever known me to tell a lie?’ Bruce smiled. ‘Even after everything, even after all these years, finally we can be together. If you can ever forgive me for my pigheadedness, for my damage and for my own fear.’
What would it be like to stay? Could he build a life with Bruce? That’s what he’d always wanted, even through his attempts to forget. And now? The lies were exposed and they couldn’t hurt them anymore. Any problems from here on were of their own honest making.
And they could make them together.
Wasn’t it worth the risk?
‘I’ve got one more secret.’
Bruce blinked. ‘Oh.’
Gabriel closed the gap between them and interlaced his fingers with Bruce’s. ‘The secret is that I have been in love with you since the moment I met you, from lovesick teenager to adult mental case. And I promise you, Bruce Clifton, that that is the last secret I will ever keep from you.’ He smiled up at Bruce, the grip on his heart easing, the blood returning to pump hard through its valves.
‘See? Some secrets are better shared.’
Bruce dipped his head and kissed him. Gabriel’s heart beat hard and fast, striving to meet the love coursing through him from Bruce’s lips. He put a hand behind Bruce’s head and held him in place, desperate to wash away the agony and the
