Margaret’s head slowly landed on Simon’s arm as they stared at her. Quickly wiping her eyes, she spoke to him as he stroked along his wife’s face one last time, “She looks so peaceful and beautiful. She did such a wonderful job with Jr. and I know she would have been the best mother. She was so blessed, Simon. Even if her time here was short.” Finding comfort in her own words, she could feel that her son didn’t feel the same way.
Shaking his head quickly, he swallowed down the lump in his throat and willed himself to pull his hand away. The hardest thing he’d ever done.
Margaret blew out before she pressed a shaken hand to her lips and rested it on Emily’s shoulder, “Come on, son.” She whispered once she’d said goodbye.
Stepping away, Simon’s eyes were fixated on her until the director pushed her back inside. He was unable to say anything as he was led out by his mother, who in turn glanced back at the man, “Thank you.” She said in a shaken tone.
As they walked towards the entrance, the sun filtered through the windows brightly and the hallway was illuminated in a soft, warm light. The day was beautiful just like Emily. Outside of the funeral home, Simon Sr. puffed on a cigarette and Miriam pulled away from Jack as they emerged. Margaret had tears in her eyes and a peaceful smile on her face as she nodded and approached her, “She’s beautiful. She’s perfect. She’s…everything right now.” She whispered. Miriam instantly took Margaret into her arms and the two women hugged each other tightly amid their sobs. Pulling away from her, Margaret held Miriam’s shoulders, “We will see you both at our house. Simon, we’re going to be at the house this evening, alright?” she asked turning back to Miriam, “We will meet you at our house as soon as we drop him off. See you soon.”
Simon nodded to his mother before he hugged Jack and Miriam goodbye. He didn’t say a word and that silence carried the entire ride back to his home. Though he was silent, there was a storm spinning violently inside of him. The closer they got to the house, a feeling of urgency grew in the pit of his stomach. He needed to see his kids and had a strong need to go to his family. To hide under the blanket of normalcy that he was able to obtain under his own roof.
Cherish had a busy couple of hours with the newborns. Now, that they were both fed, changed, and asleep, she could finally take care of herself. The door to the bathroom was wide open so she’d be able to check on them frequently during her shower. Even though she’d tried to stay busy, time crawled by and the knot in her stomach only grew. She just wanted Simon to be stable. Not okay, not alright, not good, great, or amazing. Just, stable.
Once his parents pulled into the driveway, Simon got out of the car and gave a rushed wave in their direction. He knew they planned to return to the house with Emily’s parents, but didn’t care. Cherish was in the middle of putting on clean clothes and sighed to herself in comfort. Putting his key into the door, he unlocked it and walked in the familiar smell of home. He didn’t bother to take off his shoes and simply went on the hunt to find the babies. After he’d checked the first floor, he climbed up the steps and entered his bedroom. There they were, just as perfect as he left them. They laid together in the middle of the bed and even though Jasmine was there, a small portion of him still expected Emily. Oddly, that’s not the one he knew would bring him comfort.
Cherish hadn’t heard him enter the house and it wasn’t until she appeared in the doorway did she see him. Practically jumping out of her skin, she swallowed her scream and leaned her head back. With a hand pressed to her chest, she hesitated before she approaching, “I…didn’t hear you come home.” She said.
Simon didn’t notice Cherish until she spoke. He had stared at the kids when she took him completely off guard. It wasn’t Emily’s voice and it never would be. Emily was no longer there. Finally, the pain, guilt, and suffering he’d pushed away hit him. Harder than the moment when she died or when he saw her lifeless body. The hole Emily left in his life was vacant and deep. He felt as though the floor was stolen away from under him. Every single emotion reeled brutally inside.
To Cherish, Simon looked far-off and strange. Almost as though he couldn’t hear her in his own headspace. The way he stared unnerved her and she sensed something was irrevocably different about the man she’d come to know in the last four days. Once again, she hesitated before she took a step towards him. Suddenly, she felt as though she was in the wrong place. Like she shouldn’t have been there, in their home, in their bathroom, in their bed to begin with. She didn’t know what to say or what to do and was at a complete loss, “Simon, h-how was it? A-are you okay?” she asked in a concerned tone.
He opened his mouth to answer but not a sound came out. All she did was ask a simple question, but the shock had set in. Cherish was there as she had been before he left and the warmth he
