Jasmine was wailing by the time Simon got to the kitchen. He started her bottle and bounced with light pats on her back. His efforts to appease this little girl wasn’t working. She just wanted food and made it known with her fussing.
Once Cherish was finished, Jr. softly wailed by the time she returned to the bedroom and lifted him up and out of the crib, “Okay big boy. It’s alright.” She whispered to him softly.
Before giving him what he wanted, he was lowered on the changing table, and his body was freed from the tight burrito. Jr. cried out once he felt a chilled wipe touch his butt. Cherish reached in the crib, grabbed a pacifier, and popped it in his mouth. A mother’s way to nicely tell a child to shut up. Jr. sucked on the rubber for about a minute before he tossed his head to the side and began to cry again. At least he gave her enough time to finish. Sighing, she picked him up and kissed his little cheeks. The rocking chair was bypassed altogether as she returned to the bed and laid down with him. Jr. took to her breast and, once again, Cherish pushed her own hunger to the side. She’d been hungry for most of the evening and night but, in the middle of the chaos of parenthood, she simply forgot. Her eyes slowly began to close as the sounds of Jr.’s sucks lulled her over exhausted body to sleep.
Simon was in the middle of feeding Jasmine. He zoned out as he watched the little girl suck down her milk. So, this was the reality of waking up without Emily. There were many different scenarios that had crossed their minds as her stomach grew with their child. The possibility of death never came. After the fact, he almost wished he had prepared for it. Now he paid the price of feeling constantly stunned and dull inside. He bore a great deal of pain which had to be placed on the back burner.
Making his way into the living room, he sat down, and turned the television on to numb his thoughts. Before long Jasmine drank the last drop and he pulled the bottle from her mouth. He stared down at her beautiful face and felt a bit of light spur deep within his sorrows, “Come on sweetheart.” He whispered to her lifting her over his shoulder and burping her. The sadness that grew inside him dissipated temporarily to get him through. He pressed his face against the side of Jasmine’s and kissed her cheek.
Sitting with her for a few minutes, he then sighed, stood, and placed her in the crib to sleep. He released a groggy hum as he washed out the bottle and his hands. Once finished, the only sound in the house was the low droning voices on the television. Simon sighed to himself before he returned in the room with Jasmine and laid on the couch in a careless manner.
Now, he wanted a nap.
Unfortunately, he’d missed the car pulling up in the driveway and the couple standing at the front door. Suddenly, the doorbell echoed through the house. As Jr. tugged on Cherish’s breast, she was far too tired for the noise to register properly in her mind had trouble coming around to the fact that someone was at the door, with her baby downstairs, and this wasn’t her house. This was the most peace she had in months despite two newborns. Peace she felt guilty about when awake. Cherish felt as though she was taking advantage of a man who was struggling in an excruciating situation. After meeting Emily, that beautiful and vibrant woman had made an imprint on her life. Stirring, she opened her eyes just long enough to see Jr. was fine in his surrogate’s arms. A soft smile graced her features as she rested to with her lips pressed against his head.
Simon jerked forward from the couch in alarm before his feet sluggishly carried him to the door. Scratching against his chest, he leaned into the peephole and saw his in-laws. A shocked rush of numbness washed over him. He’d completely forgotten they had planned to make the trip after Jr. was born. They were supposed to arrive a few days later. In a blinding flash, all his thoughts of Emily were brought back to the forefront of his mind. Now he had to face her wonderful parents. A couple who lost their daughter because she had a child with him.
Simon threw an anxious glance in the direction of the stairs to see if Cherish had made an appearance. He didn’t know how he was going to explain her to them. There was a woman in his home and his bed just days after his wife passed. His hands raked through his hair as the bell echoed twice more, “Fuck.” He muttered to himself opening the door. Simon forced a faint smile, but wary depression showed in his eyes and body language.
The pair pushed their way inside and Emily’s mother, Miriam, was the first one to speak, “Oh Simon, we came straight away. Come here.” She whispered before a crestfallen sigh fell from her heart. She hugged him and squeezed tighter than ever before. She was naturally a good natured and optimistic woman, but her hold expressed just how much pain she was in. Their eyes were bright red, and the circles showed they were just as distraught as him.
Emily’s father, Jack, pulled Simon
