3
~Cole~
JESUS CHRIST.
Those manicured nails of hers were savagely sharp. I could feel the sting of them as they’d scored three red-raw marks down my cheek.
I was a trained fighter. I kicked ass on the underground fighting circuits, because I was the best of the best. Sure, I had the muscle mass and cement blocks for fists, but my real talent was that I was lightning-fast. I should’ve been able to deflect it, to snatch her wrist before her hand had connected. But I just really hadn’t expected that from her. She’d never struck me before. We both had volatile tempers when we were provoked, but it never escalated to anything close to violence with each other. For me, it wasn’t even a question. Not only could I do some serious damage if I went there, I’d just never hit a woman. Ever. Especially not her. There was always an unspoken line there, a line we’d never crossed.
The fact that she’d just done that told me just how out of sorts she was. She wasn’t herself, not at all. She was vulnerable, something I’d picked up on with her reactions to me so far. She was in a lot of pain.
And, here I was, being a dick.
But I just couldn’t stomach what she’d told me. I couldn’t even begin to wrap my head around it.
She knew how badly I wanted a family. But we both also knew that it wasn’t possible with the lives we both led. I wouldn’t bring a child into danger and darkness. I wanted to create a better life, provide a better existence for my own family than what I’d had after my parents had died when me and my little sister, Luce, were so young. Tasha and I couldn’t even be together, so settling down and bringing a baby into it wasn’t feasible.
So, what? She’d gone to Nik instead?
She’d had enough of the way things were with us, all the walls in our way, and sought him out instead? Did she really think things would be any different with that monster? She must’ve lost it completely if she’d believed that even for a second, because he was a psychotic, brutal bastard. And, he didn’t respect the line that I did. He’d struck her several times back when they’d fucked around. He treated her like club pussy. Hell, he treated all women like second-class trash.
And now she’d tied herself to him forever?
I turned away, scrubbing my hand over my face roughly. “I can’t deal with this.”
I strode to the bedroom door, needing to get the fuck away from her so I could process this, so I could think straight. I couldn’t just walk away permanently. She was key to completing my mission for Slade. And, hell, I fucking loved her. Despite everything, that shit didn’t just die because you willed it. Once I’d completed my mission, it was gonna have to start, though, because there was no way I could ever accept what she’d done with Nik Stone. Tying herself to him in such a permanent way, bringing a kid into his brutal world, choosing him over me, disgusted me. I’d forgiven a lot with her, but I could never forgive that.
I was just past the threshold when an unfamiliar sound from her stopped me short.
Sniffling and whimpering.
Fuck.
She was crying.
She really was out of it. I’d only seen her cry twice in all of the eight years that I’d known her.
I gritted my teeth and dug my fingers into the doorframe, fighting to resist the overwhelming urge to turn back and comfort her.
Dammit!
I turned back and made my way over to her as she was heading to the bathroom.
“Tasha,” I said, as softly as I could manage, given how pissed I was.
I reached for her hand, but she shook me off, screaming, “Don’t touch me, you asshole!”
“I’m the asshole here?”
“Yes!”
“You fucked that monster and let him knock you up with his devil spawn! And I’m the one in the wrong?” I tugged at my hair, trying to contain my temper. She really wasn’t making it easy for me. “Damn, woman, you really have a way of spinning things in your favor.”
“I haven’t been anywhere near him,” she murmured sadly to herself. “The fact that you’d go there and think I would ever do that to you is just—”
“Wait. What?”
She hung her head, still with her back to me. “Just get out.”
It bothered me that I couldn’t see her face, that she wouldn’t let me connect with her. She had very expressive features, especially those beautiful eyes of hers and without that I couldn’t read her. She was shut down, keeping me out. “What are you saying?” I pressed, moving closer and carefully rounding her. “You and Nik didn’t happen six weeks back?”
“You want to believe it, so believe it,” she said, rubbing her eyes and wiping her tears away.
She started when she pulled her hands away and found me standing right in front of her, in the small space between her and the bathroom door.
“Don’t look away,” I urged her.
With a heavy sigh she complied, leaving her hands down. My gut twisted at the sight of her red raw eyes, her tear-stained cheeks. I hated seeing her in such a state.
“I’m sorry, baby.” I reached out and brushed a lock of her silky black hair away from her eye. “I never want to upset you. Ever. Especially, not like this. It’s just, when it comes to you and that motherfucker, I can’t see straight. The only reason he’s not buried six-feet deep is because of Slade’s do-not-touch order. He knows I’m gunning for him, so he put out that order to stop me.”
“And to prevent a war.”
“Yeah.”
She shook her head, a hint of a smile ghosting her lips. “You crazy bastard.”
“All bets are off when it comes to you, firecracker,” I said, with a wink.
“I haven’t
