Boyd gives a curt nod of understanding, as usual displaying utter professionalism, not allowing a hint of curiosity as to why Jai and no one else should be allowed in my office to appear on his features. “Of course, sir.”
Once we’re inside, Jai finally breaks the silence that’s been stretching between us. “What’s going on? Lukas, you’re freaking me out.”
“Here, I need to show you something.” I stride over to my desk and pick up the book I’ve borrowed from Veronika, opening to the page I’ve bookmarked with a sticky note.
Jai’s face grows pale as he reads, his expression twisting into one of disgust. “What the hell is this?”
“I presume you know what a Monarchical Act is?”
He nods.
“My father put this one forward about eighteen years ago, while I was away at university. And it passed through Parliament so quietly everyone seems to have forgotten it exists.”
“How did you come to learn of it?”
“Veronika showed it to me.” I reach for his hand, running my thumb along the back of it. “We’re getting it overturned. I swear it, the next session of Parliament, this will be the only item on the agenda.”
He nods, swallowing thickly. “But?”
I let my eyes fall closed, loosing a dejected sigh. “But Parliament doesn’t resume until late January.”
He nods slowly, as if he’s trying to convince himself of something. “Okay. Okay…I guess we can just keep things quiet until then. We’ve been doing okay so far…”
I shake my head. “That’s not going to work.”
“Why not?”
“We’re too obvious,” I tell him. “Jai…kotya…when you’re in the room I can’t keep my eyes off you. It’s all I can do not to reach out and touch you.”
Jai nods, letting out a loud sigh. “Okay, so what are we going to do then.”
“The best thing is probably for you to go back to the States until this is all sorted out. We could say you’ve gone home for the holiday season—it wouldn’t raise any suspicions.”
“You want me to leave?”
The hurt in his voice and on his face makes my heart break. All I can do is wrap my arms around him and try to reassure him. “No. God, no. I want you here with me. I want to see you every day, and sleep next to you every night.” I nuzzle against his hair, breathing in his scent. “I want to touch you, and kiss you, and make love to you. But we can’t. Not while this is being worked out. Too many people already know, and too many more will figure it out.” I draw back so I can look him in the eyes, my thumb coming up to brush over his cheek. “Kotya, if the wrong person found out about us…”
His eyes fall closed and he nods, the sigh that escapes his lips is one full of regret. “I know.”
I press a soft kiss to his lips. “I love you. I promise, we’ll be together again—when it’s safe.”
Veronika organizes Jai’s flights home for the next day, and I spend the night in his bed memorizing every single inch of his body, knowing it will be at least six weeks before I get to touch him again. Six weeks. It might not seem like it, but it’s a long fucking time. Six weeks ago I couldn’t even begin to fathom how deep my feelings for this man would grow. Now I can’t imagine my life without him.
The next six weeks are going to be pure torture.
19
JAI
There’s no nervous anticipation during my flight back to the States like there was when I travelled to Korova four months ago. All I feel now is hollow and wrung out. There’s a tense knot in the pit of my stomach and I don’t know what the hell to do with it. All I want is to be by Lukas’s side, hold his hand, wrap my arms around him, comfort him as he tries to deal with yet another betrayal by his asshole father, this one from beyond the grave. But I can’t.
Crawling out from the comfort of his arms this morning, knowing it was the last time I’d feel them wrapped around me for at least a month and a half, was seriously one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I decided not to wake him, knowing that would only make my leaving harder, and instead quickly dressed, packed a suitcase, and confirmed my flight details with Veronika.
Lukas had suggested I take the royal jet, but if there was anything that would tip off the gossipy reporters that there was more to our relationship, it was me being flown back to the U.S. in the comfort of the king’s personal plane. Veronika was at least able to get me a direct flight this time, and a business class ticket. She seemed genuinely upset about the situation, and I was glad to see Lukas has such loyal people in his corner. At least if I can’t be around, he still has people he can count on.
When I arrive in New York, I don’t even hesitate before getting into a cab and giving the address for Blake and Owen’s Greenwich Village brownstone. I try to call Owen from the cab but it goes straight to voicemail, telling me he’s likely at work. It’s late afternoon so I’m assuming Blake will be around, and if not, well, I guess I’ll just park myself on the front steps and wait. It’s not like I need to be anywhere…
When the cab pulls up at the address I’ve given, I lug my case out of the trunk and haul it up the front steps of the beautiful townhouse. After a minute of waiting, Blake answers my ring, his eyes widening when he sees me standing on the doorstep. “Jai?”
“Can I crash here for a bit?” I ask miserably. “I really don’t
