I shrugged, threw a handful of nuts into my mouth, then grabbed my mug and walked away without answering. Let them gossip.
Surprisingly, I found it easier to concentrate now that Anna was in the office and not off somewhere in my imagination. I got through my backlog of code reviews and created new tickets for my team. Every so often, I looked up and saw Anna meeting someone new, or staring intently at her work laptop, no doubt going through the sexual harassment training materials. I noticed other guys (too many—it was a fintech company, after all) checking her out, too. By 6pm, I felt like I had accomplished enough and was ready to take Anna home and away from all those lonely men.
“How was your first day?” I asked, as we walked towards the subway.
“Good. Everyone seems really nice. I didn’t do much today besides meet people, take stock of what’s in the kitchen, and review some materials. I also started the sexual harassment training.” She took my hand. “Speaking of, I think Tom finally got the hint. He just waved today and didn’t say anything weird to me. Do you think Cassie told him?”
I snorted. “And probably everyone else from Stumpstash who was at her wedding. So, most of the company.”
“Oh.” She was silent, lost in thought.
“Why do you ask?”
“Do you...think they’ll all assume that I got the job because of you?”
“I assume they’ll think it was because of Cassie. They know you were her old college roommate.”
“But you don’t think that they’d think I was just…” She trailed off.
“What? Sleeping with me to get the job?” She didn’t say anything, so I continued, “One, I’m not your direct supervisor, nor was I the hiring manager. Two, everyone gets a job in tech through referrals. I got my job because of Emily, Cassie got her job because of me, and you got your job because of Cassie.” I squeezed her hand. “Why do you care so much about what people think?”
She let go of my hand and scowled at me. “Wow, that was such a judgmental question.”
“Well why should you care about what people think? Nobody cares how you got the job, as long as you can do your job.”
She stopped walking, so I stopped beside her. “I thought you said you were an advocate for women in tech. Do you even know how hard it is to earn and keep people’s respect in a workplace environment? As a woman? People are always all too happy to put you down. I want people to know that I got the job because of my skills, not because I was fucking you—”
“You did. You got the job the same way everyone else did. And because I’m not your boss, so it doesn’t matter that we’re sleeping together, okay? It’s not a big deal. Chill out.” We stood in the middle of the corridor just after the entrance to the subway station. Commuters streamed past us, ignoring us in typical New York fashion, with only the occasional sideways glance.
Her eyes flashed and she poked an accusing finger into my chest. “Chill out? You’re so fucking patronizing sometimes, you know that? You think you know everything, don’t you? I bet you get off on lecturing me and taking care of me like I’m your pet or some—”
“No, I get off on you being a strong-willed, passionate woman.” I grabbed her shoulders, pulled her to me, and kissed her.
At first she froze, her lips clamped firmly shut against me. But after a moment, her body melted into mine, and she met my tongue with hers. Her arms wrapped around my waist and my hands shifted up to cup the back of her head, fingers slipping into her silky hair.
“Get a room!” said an old lady as she walked by. Someone else jostled me as they passed.
We broke our kiss and looked into each other’s eyes. Her gaze went from wanton to withering in a heartbeat, and she quickly looked away, clearly still dissatisfied. “Let’s take her advice,” I said. I took her hand again and we continued on in silence until we reached the subway platform.
I turned to face her and sighed. “I don’t mean to be patronizing, Anna. I do think it can be hard for women in the workplace. But I know that you’re going to do a great job and I’m also sure that no one will care that we’re dating. I can think of at least two Stumpstash couples, and nobody mentions anything about their relationship at work.”
She shook her head and continued staring at the tracks, not saying anything.
“Anna, talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” she bit out, crossing her arms.
“Anna, don’t be like—”
“Are you patronizing me again?” she snapped, turning back to look at me.
I threw my hands up in exasperation. “If you’re going to act so fucking immature, then yes! You won’t tell me what’s bothering you. Let’s talk about it like adults!”
A flexed jaw muscle was her only response. She was grinding her teeth.
The train screeched as it pulled to a slow stop before us. When the doors opened, she angrily stepped inside. I followed her in, slowly breathing in and out.
We found a spot near the door that led to the next car, then turned to face each other.
“You know what your problem is? You think things are so simple,” she angrily whispered. “Everything is black and white and crystal clear to you. But things are not that simple.”
“Where is this coming from?” I muttered back. “I didn’t say anything was simple. I didn’t—”
“You’re so happy and optimistic, like everything’s always going to work out for you. Things don’t always—”
“What do you want me to say? Geez, you’re fucked? Too bad for you? You have to—”
“God, can you just shut up and stop telling me what to do? Just fucking let me talk for once?”
