“I would prefer a Christian husband. They value their wives more than our people do.”
“Then maybe you should become a Christian yourself. It might be easier to find a Christian husband.”
“I am not sure I want to become a Christian,” Kaarina said. “Their beliefs are so different from ours.”
“Why don’t you at least pray to the Christian God? That cannot do any harm. We already pray to our gods. Besides, the Christians often pray to their God when they are feeling sad or need guidance. It seems to help them feel better.”
“I will try it,” Kaarina said.
“Good. And do not forget I am here to listen if you want to talk.”
“Thank you, Eira. You are a good friend.”
Landwulf’s heart felt heavy as he guided his horse south towards the village of Alahsan. It was a long journey and each step was putting a greater distance between himself and the life he knew and loved. He tried to bury the resentment he felt deep inside; he didn’t want to carry an unforgiving spirit towards his parents. But couldn’t they understand that he was a man now and could make his own decisions? And what of poor Kaarina? Surely she must know by now that he had gone. Did she think that leaving her was his own choice? Would Eira try to explain what had happened? He’d tried to explain the reason for his sudden departure, hoping that she would help Kaarina to understand.
He thought of how happy Kaarina had been on the last day they’d seen each other, on the beach in the rain. His heart constricted when he realized that this would wipe her happiness away.
But to be fair to his parents, he would go along with their plan. He would go to the village of Alahsan and try to find a bride. He would do his best to do what they wanted. And perhaps they were right; perhaps there was a girl from among his people who would make a better choice than Kaarina. But he doubted that. He doubted that he would be able to get Kaarina out of his mind long enough to assess another girl’s worthiness.
He sighed and patted his horse on the neck. “It might be just you and me for the next few years,” he said aloud. “It doesn’t seem that I will find a wife easily. So I will only have you for company.” Despite his gloomy mood, it struck him as funny. He laughed and the horse’s ears flicked back. He would become known as the man who talked to his horse because he couldn’t find a wife.
“Oh God, please care for Kaarina,” he prayed, deciding that prayer was a better option than talking to his horse. “Comfort her if she’s sad. And please guide me to make the right choices. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Peace replaced worry after he’d prayed and as Landwulf turned his attention to the journey ahead. Tinges of excitement started to build as he wondered what adventures awaited him. What would happen when he reached Alahsan? Were his parents right? Would he find happiness there, after all?
CHAPTER 9
K aarina felt as if she spent each day wading through water. Her sorrow seemed to slow her steps and it weighed so heavily on her heart that it seemed as if it would fall out of her chest and drag on the ground behind her.
Emiline noticed her grief and suspected that it had something to do with Landwulf’s departure, but she didn’t know how to broach the subject so she said nothing. Instead, she showed extra kindness, allowing Kaarina plenty of time to do as she wished. Kaarina was grateful for her thoughtfulness. It gave her time to start processing her grief in private.
Kaarina thought about Eira’s advice. She wasn’t sure she was ready to become a Christian; she had little interest in finding a Christian husband if she couldn’t have Landwulf and it didn’t seem like a good enough reason to change her faith. But she did decide to pray to the Christians’ God. She tried it one evening when she was alone in her little room and the house was quiet. She’d seen the Christians kneeling on their knees when they prayed, so she knelt beside the bed and stayed there for a while, thinking about what to say to a God she didn’t know.
“God of the Christians,” she finally said out loud, “I don’t know how to talk to you. Please excuse my ignorance.” Nothing alarming happened, so she decided to continue. “Oh God of the Christians, my friend told me that you help people to feel better. My heart is heavy from the loss of my beloved. He has gone to find a wife who is more worthy than I. Please help my sorrow to ease and my heart to feel happy again. And please send him back to me.” She paused, thinking of the right way to end her prayer. “Oh God of the Christians, thank you for hearing my prayer.”
There was no answer but as she slid into bed, Kaarina felt a sense of peace steal over her troubled heart. Was that what Eira meant when she said that the God of the Christians helped people when they were feeling sad?
Kaarina made her way purposefully across the street to visit Eira. She was hoping that Sigrid and Frida would be weaving today. She had questions that she wanted to ask them. But when she arrived, Eira was sitting at her loom and she looked sad.
“What’s wrong, Eira?” she asked.
“Halvar should have been back by now,” Eira said, her eyes downcast. “With each day that passes, I cannot help but think that something terrible has happened to him and I will never see him again.”
Kaarina put her hand
