‘I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I’ve been too scared.’ Nell felt a breath escape from her lungs and linger in her throat. ‘But I have to tell you now,’ he said, nodding to himself. Nell nodded along too. His eyes were misting with tears and Nell bit back the urge to blurt out her feelings. Instead of love, Tom’s face was filled with sadness and Nell’s hopes vanished. ‘My eyesight’s failing, and I might be going blind.’
It was like someone had thrown a bucket of cold water over her. Even her clothes felt damp, sticking to her and making her skin clammy. Tom linked his fingers with hers, his voice quivering.
‘I’ve got a condition that means my eyesight will fail over time. First the peripheral vision, then possibly the central vision too, and if that happens, I could go completely blind.’
The fear and pain in Tom’s face stabbed straight into her heart and she had to look away, staring at the twinkling tea lights that seemed so hopeful lighting up the dark. When she figured out what to say her voice shook with emotion. ‘All the accidents recently—’
‘Yes. Due to the sight I’m already losing in my peripheral vision.’
‘Oh, Tom.’ She turned back to him and he went to pull his hand away, but she wouldn’t let him. She held it firm. It was a shock, but it didn’t make any difference to the way she felt about him. The future they’d have together might be different to the one she’d imagined, but it was a future she wanted – he was what she wanted – and she was going to grab hold of it all with both hands.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before.’
‘How long have you known?’
‘That there’s definitely something wrong? Only a couple of weeks. I saw a consultant – it’s been a lot to get my head around. But I’ve been worried for a while – the headaches – they were quite scary. In a way, I’m relieved it’s not something worse.’ The implication hit Nell and she squeezed his hand. It didn’t even bear thinking about. ‘But there’s something else too. I have to tell you now, Nell that …’ He took a breath and Nell’s heart fluttered once more. ‘I love you. I’ve loved you for years and years. You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met. And if there’s any chance we can be together – if I can see your face smiling at me first thing in the morning – imprint it on my mind before I can’t see it anymore – I—’
A few tears escaped from his eyes and Nell reached up, watching the tips of her fingers shake with emotion as she wiped them gently away. Her whole body fizzed as she moved her head nearer and finally kissed his trembling lips.
From the moment her mouth met his it was like every daydream she’d ever had rolled into one magical moment. Her ears tingled and she could have sworn there was music, but whether it was that choir of angels she always imagined or the sound of her soul singing with joy she didn’t know. Her body filled with liquid love like it had been poured into her veins. The Christmas wish she never knew she’d made was coming true.
‘It’s not – it’s not pity, is it?’ asked Tom, when they separated. ‘I couldn’t bear that.’
‘Don’t be such a tit,’ Nell scolded. ‘If I hadn’t wanted to do that, I wouldn’t have. When have you ever been able to make me do something I didn’t want to do?’
‘True,’ he replied, grinning.
‘Besides, it’s what I brought you out here to tell you.’
‘It is?’ His face registered shock and then happiness.
Nell smiled and the warmth of his love flattened the goose bumps on her skin. ‘When we were at the Christmas market, Kieran let slip that you – you know – love me,’ she said with a laugh. It still didn’t feel real.
‘But what about Harry? At the mayor’s party you seemed really … close.’
‘Oh, Harry’s nice enough but … no.’
‘But Nell, you do realise that our life together won’t be the same as everyone else’s. It won’t be a perfect movie-type ending. If I do go blind—’
Nell jumped in to finish his sentence. ‘It’ll be our perfect ending and if that means we make some adjustments, we do. As long as I’m with you, it’ll be better than any romcom movie ever could be.’ She kissed him again and the kiss they shared contained nothing but tenderness and pure love.
On the holly bench, as the music from the wedding reception carried on the still night air, Nell snuggled into Tom and praised herself on, for once, being absolutely right: her head did nestle perfectly on his shoulder.
Chapter 25
Christmas Day arrived in a fuzz of joy, and Nell and Tom snuggled on the sofa in the lounge, next to the fire. The Christmas tree stood proudly beside them, glittering in the pale white light that penetrated the window. The hotel was deserted as all the guests had gone off early to visit family. Mrs Meggett had left, her breakfast duties complete and an envelope containing a Christmas bonus tucked into her handbag. Cat and Kieran were on their honeymoon in Tenerife and had sent a picture of them both in bathing suits and Santa hats, sunning themselves on a sandy beach.
Tom and Nell had already called in to see Grandad Nigel and given him his Christmas present, a whole set of audiobooks from his favourite writer. It meant he didn’t have to miss out
