The next morning, I reconsidered. Or, if I was honest, I finally caved and texted her right before we started our day of press.
Jace: Poppy u there?
Poppy: Y.
Jace: hi
Poppy: Hi – r u still mad at me?
Jace: I’m not mad at you I’m so fuckin sad.
Poppy: U don’t have to be sad, I love you so much
Jace: I love you more than you know.
Poppy: I miss you so much. I hate being without you.
Jace: I’m not handling things well.
Poppy: Ur going thru a lot at once.
Jace: …
Jace: …
Poppy: How r things in NYC?
Jace: goin thru the motions
Poppy: Ok – BTW I’m rejecting the breakup.
Jace: What?
Poppy: Y
Jace: ok
Poppy: We are not broken up.
Jace: …
Jace: I love you.
Poppy: I love you too.
Jace: I’m sorry.
Poppy: It’s ok.
Jace: FT after the show?
Poppy: Only if you’re naked.
Jace: (thumbs up emoji)
Poppy (eggplant cherry emoji)
Jace: You made me lol.
Poppy: good
Relieved that Alex would stick by me after my epic melt-down settled me down a bit and allowed me to focus. Unfortunately, Ty’s indiscretion with Sienna gave me an entirely new situation to handle. Anger overtook me. I yelled at him. It was like I couldn’t control my feelings at all.
I knew I was triggered and probably projecting my own Cassie situation on Ty, but it felt like there was no way to manage my rage and it scared me.
I focused on the fact that soon I’d be FaceTiming with Alex, and it calmed me down. I made it through the movie premiere and just needed to get through the performance and get back to the hotel.
From the time I tapped out the beat to Rise we put on a show to end all shows. Everyone was on fire. Playing live made everything we did worth it, there was no feeling like it. I actually had fun and forgot my problems for a couple of hours.
Wishing Alex was on the side stage with Zoey, I glanced at the petite dynamo and my hackles went up when I saw Sienna slink in next to her.
I knew shit was going down.
After irrationally lashing out at Ty and Zoey and being rightfully yelled at, I followed Ty into the VIP tent. When we arrived for the meet-and-greet, I took one look around and got the fuck out of there. I couldn’t do it. With so much looming over me, I wanted Ty to finally step up and handle his own shit.
I already had too much on my plate.
Luckily, the car got me back to my hotel quickly. Immediately after closing my door to the suite, I crawled under the soft, fluffy comforter and called Alex. When she answered, we switched to FaceTime, and my heart thudded when her beautiful face filled my screen. In an instant, all my cares melted away.
Or so I thought.
“Hey,” I said softly, and before I could stop it tears welled up in my eyes.
“Oh, Jace.” Alex was in her bedroom, the lamp on the nightstand illuminating her golden, honey hair.
“Poppy.” I could barely get her nickname out before I full out started crying. Hard.
“Jace! Jace!” I could hear Alex yelling. “Please pick up the phone, I need to see that you’re okay.”
“I’m a fucking mess,” I blubbered, and I could see from the tiny picture on the screen that I looked slightly crazy. “Let me call you back after I pull myself together.”
“No!” she admonished and then her voice turned soothing. “You don’t need to hide anything from me. Especially your feelings.”
“Everything is spinning out of control.” My voice was a little more stable now. “I don’t have it in me to deal with Ty and Zoey stuff anymore and there’s a whole new issue.”
“What happened?” She settled back against the light-yellow pillows that we had slept on together for the past few months.
By the time I’d filled her in on the day’s events, I’d stopped bawling like a child. My breathing was normal, and I’d settled back into my own hotel bed. Just having her with me made such a difference, I didn’t ever want to be without her. The thought of how close we came to breaking up made me nearly well up again. Then I remembered what we were facing with my paternity situation.
I was so fucked.
I knew my emotions were all over the map and I didn’t want to play Alex like a yo-yo, but I felt completely unable to think clearly. “You must be crazy to want to be with me, Poppy. You’re going to run screaming at some point if I don’t get my shit together.”
“You are in the middle of what might be the biggest personal crisis you’ve ever had, Jace.” Alex’s calm voice soothed me. “Wherever your emotions take you, it’s all fine. I will be here for you, no matter what.”
“I love you.” I looked right at her through the screen. “I really, really love you.”
Her entire expression softened, and she looked like she was about to cry.
“I love you.” She brought the phone close up so her face filled the screen and puckered up her soft, pink lips.
I kissed her back through the screen. “I’ll be back home tomorrow evening. Can you meet me at my condo?”
“Yes, because I can’t wait to be skin-on-skin with you.”
“You have no idea.” I pointed to the coverlet, which had begun to tent when she gave me the screen kiss.
“Can I see?” She lifted her T-shirt and threw it on the ground, circling a tight, brown nipple with her finger.
My cock immediately became hard enough to cut diamonds. Slowly, I pulled the fluffy comforter down to reveal my shaft flush against my
