For someone who was personally self-effacing, Elizabeth II as queen has always had an astonishing degree of certitude. Her Private Secretary the Hon. (later Sir) Martin (then Lord) Charteris was the first to comment upon this immediately following her accession at the age of twenty five. He noticed how sure-footed she became as soon as she had to fulfill the role of monarch. She had a genuine natural authority and absolute confidence, possibly emanating from the schooling she received in the role of monarch from her father King George VI and her grandmother Queen Mary.
The Queen put this regal assurance to good use as she conferred with the head of the family, Prince Philip, who by then resided full time at Wood Farm on the Sandringham Estate, having given up public life. Known within the family for his wisdom, practicality, humanity, and unflinchingly royal approach to duty, his viewpoint, according to a European royal was, ‘The most important thing was to not let things drag on.’ Decisions must be made, and made quickly, so a date was set for a meeting on Monday the 13th January between the Queen, Harry, and the two immediate monarchs-in-waiting, Charles and William. To ensure that decisions would have to be made in a short space of time, the Queen informed everyone that it had to conclude before teatime, which meant that it could not go on beyond 5pm.
I was informed by royal cousins that Prince Philip was appalled at the way in which Meghan and Harry had tried to bring pressure to bear to get their own way. He was happy not to participate in the meeting itself, and, having fortified the Queen with his support, was driven away from the big house by his great friend Penny, wife of his maternal uncle Dickie Mountbatten’s grandson Norton Knatchbull, 3rd Earl Mountbatten of Burma just before the meeting was due to start. Harry had arrived from Windsor early, hoping to meet with his grandmother beforehand to influence her, but it did not work. She remained unavailable until the appointed time, waiting until the Prince of Wales and William arrived.
Despite the Queen making it clear that she wanted an agreement before the meeting concluded, there was personal anguish all round. Charles was distraught that his efforts to include Meghan had come to naught and that Harry had thrown them all a curved ball, while William was equally distraught that the brother whom he had loved and protected all his life could be behaving in what he regarded as so foolhardy and destructive a manner. The Queen was disappointed that all the sterling possibilities the union had engendered throughout the Commonwealth might come to nought, and that the warmth, generosity and hospitality the family and public had shown to Meghan had meant so little. Harry himself felt that he was not being supported enough and was upset when it became apparent that he and Meghan would not be able to trip off to North America, cut deals left right and centre, trip back over to Britain for a few photo ops which would keep their earning potential topped up, and generally just do as they pleased. Insofar as their well laid plans to exploit their royal positions were concerned, he was made aware that there would be a trial period of a year’s duration. ‘A lot can happen in a year,’ a European prince said. ‘By not coming to a definitive agreement, the family was buying time, allowing the Sussexes to feel the breath on their necks which would hopefully encourage them to strike only acceptable deals. Remember, Meghan is a businesswoman. The great fear is that she loves money so much she’ll sacrifice reason for profit and in doing so involve herself and the monarchy in controversy.’’
Aside from putting the couple on a probationary period, the family made it clear to Harry that he and Meghan would not be calling the shots as to what they could, and could not, do regarding their royal patronages, the way he and Meghan had suggested in their initial posting. He was informed that he would have to give up his links with the Army. This was a big blow to him, for ‘he had really envisaged popping back, hunkering down with the men, enjoying the camaraderie which had been one of the high points of his life, then breezing back to America, hopefully on a friend’s private plane, to cut more deals while Meghan increased the family fortune, whether to become President of the United States or just an ordinary billionairess was beside the point,’ one of his cousins explained. He had not calculated on being forced to stand down from being Captain General of the Royal Marines, a position he had inherited from his grandfather Prince Philip and valued greatly; Honorary Air Commandant, RAF Honington; or Commodore-in-Chief, Small Ships and Diving, Royal Naval Command. The loss of these really hurt, as he would confess a few nights later when he gave a speech at the Chelsea Ivy on behalf of Sentebale, the charity he founded which supports the mental health and wellbeing of children and young people affected by HIV in Lesotho and Botswana. He had also not lost patronage of the Invictus Games foundation, which he had also founded. Nevertheless, the only really meaningful patronages he and Meghan would be allowed to keep would be President and Vice-President of the Queen’s Commonwealth Trust, something which was within her personal gift and she could police easily. She also hoped this would leave the channels open for greater cooperation in the future. The Queen genuinely loves the Commonwealth, as everyone close to her knows, so by allowing Harry and Meghan to keep those patronages she was playing to them on many levels.
Last but not least, Harry and Meghan were also made to forgo using their Royal Highness titles. Although they were not stripped of them, by banning them
