I wasn’t scraps. I had a life too. A life I had worked my ass off for. I had people who cared and loved me for a reason, because I’d earned it. I thought I was a decent person, most of the time.
And regardless of all that, ignoring the fine fracture of pain I still felt, I still loved him. Not for a second had I ever not wanted the best for him. There hadn’t been a moment in my life that I hadn’t rooted for him despite him outgrowing me and then leaving me in the past.
He was happy to see me right then, and I’d take it.
I lifted my arms and wrapped them around his neck and hugged that long body back, tightly for all of a second, like I had missed the hell out of him. Because I had. Just for a moment, I pressed my forehead against a spot along his warm, smooth neck.
There was no harm in that. I used to hug the shit out of him all the time.
I wasn’t going to think about why we hadn’t seen each other in so long. I wasn’t going to be sad that it might be another ten years before we saw each other again after this. At least I wouldn’t be sad for one more minute.
After this hug and after what I needed to do, life could go back to normal.
“I can’t believe it’s you, Peewee,” Zac Travis pretty much whispered with that still surprised voice, the Texas accent he’d inherited from spending so much time with his Paw-Paw, thick and sweet. He held me so tight and high, I could barely touch the ground. And I’d be a goddamn liar if I said I didn’t notice how hard and muscular his chest felt pressed up against me.
One of those long arms loosened, and what had to be his palm cupped the back of my head in a gesture that surprised me even more as his rich and familiar laughter filled the ear closest to his mouth. “I cannot fuckin’ believe it.”
I couldn’t help but smile a little against his cheek, still right there in those final moments I was giving myself to soak up his attention after so long, right against the chest I’d seen bare countless times before he’d had any hair on it, and let myself savor his unexpected joy.
When he lowered me enough so I could touch the ground again flat-footed, I looked at him, still smiling. Feeling happy and surprised too.
Relieved.
The handsome man I’d been in love with when I’d been younger and dumber grinned down at me with an amazed expression that lit up his features in a way that I would have bet my life against a month ago. Zac’s gaze flicked down to everything below my neck for a split second before it was back on my face, probably taking in my Maio House polo, my plain blue jeans that were rolled up at the ankles because they were too long, and my plain black tennis shoes with white soles that made standing for eight hours a day bearable. And that beaming white smile went even wider before those strong arms went wide at his sides, his expression flushed and pleased and earnest and totally freaking Zac before the NFO. “I can’t believe it’s you. When the hell did you grow up, huh?”
Of course he couldn’t believe it was me. He hadn’t seen me in so long or even looked me up.
Andddd there went at least half my joy.
That was reality for you, a kick to the freaking vagina when you needed it and even more when you didn’t need it.
He kept right on smiling brightly as those light blue eyes strayed all over my face while my spine went tight and my shoulders dropped at his comment. “Peewee, you’re an adult,” my once-upon-a-time friend added, oblivious to what he’d reminded me of.
But I was over that shit. So I nodded at him again and said, a little bit weakly, “Most of the time.”
“What are you doin’ here?” Zac asked in that same excited voice, still oblivious. His face was all angles now, and up close, his eyes were just as kind as always. His finger came up to tap my beauty mark again as he shook his head one more time. “I cannot believe you’re here, livin’ and breathin’ in front of me.”
I remembered why I was there.
I started to reach for the blond-dusted skin wrapped around the hard muscles of his forearm before stopping. What the hell was I doing? I lowered my hand back down to my side and forced myself to meet those light blue eyes so I could do this. “Can we talk in private?”
The big smile still on his face hurt my heart, especially when he glanced down at the hand I’d pulled back, and part of it slowly melted off. But he nodded after a second, his expression turning somewhere between confused and hesitant, picking up on my mood, I could only guess. “Wherever you want, darlin’,” he agreed easily.
In other circumstances, in another lifetime, his next words would have made my day. They would have lifted me up and made my whole month. I had loved him—loved him—but for what were probably a hundred different reasons, we hadn’t seen each other in almost a third of my life. “When’d this happen? Do you live here?” he asked like he’d instantly forgotten I wanted to talk to him in private. “I feel like I’m imaginin’ this.”
I am here for a reason. Right. He needed to know; the sooner the better. I had to stay on track. He didn’t really… care. Not really. “Do you know where your phone is?” I asked him instead.
That got his smile to falter just like that. “No. I let somebody borrow it. I thought they gave it back….”
He was onto me. Maybe he’d finally put together
