He froze, then slowly unfolded himself from the cupboard and stood upright. Guilt laced his features. “I’m sorry, Eva. I should have come to see you.”
“You should have,” she confirmed, hand on hip. “Someone tried to take me. You get that, don’t you?”
“I know, I know, but they didn’t get you. The pack protected you, and they’ll keep protecting you, so please don’t worry, honey.”
Anger flared its ugly head. A combination of all the suppressed rage she’d been keeping locked inside for months and fresh annoyance at her father’s recent words. “Really, you’re going to praise the packs? Do you realize it was because of them I was nearly kidnapped? Them and this crazy life is the reason I’m now bound to the forest.”
“Um, well, err,” he spluttered, rubbing his head. “It’s not that bad here. I quite enjoy it and your brother well… he’s doing marvelously.”
Sighing, Eva attempted to let go of some of the feelings driving her. There was a part of her that blamed the packs, but she shouldn’t be angry; she and her family had come to them. The packs had let them into their world when Bass and Jackson could have quite easily turned them away. Zackary wasn’t the pack's problem, yet they’d accepted him as their own.
You’re pack now….
Her cheeks heated with embarrassment; she wasn’t being fair. She was allowing her emotions to get the better of her, and acting irrationally, but knowing that didn’t help her mood. “I know he is. I know. It’s just… I’m not sure I belong here, Dad, and now I’m trapped. And the worst of it is you and Zac aren’t even bothered. In fact, you’re happy.”
“I’m busy, Eva. For the first time since your mother… I have direction. I still miss her, I still hurt, I’m just… busy.”
Tears blurred her vision, her father’s sad, heartbreaking words reminding her how much she missed and hurt too. Eva wasn’t even sure she’d fully embraced the pain her mother’s death had brought. She hadn’t stopped to feel, and now her father and brother didn’t need her as much, she was left with time on her hands. Time where emotions she’d kept buried started to break free, like the spark of fire threatening to become an inferno if she couldn’t find a way to put it out.
“I miss her too, Dad, so, so much. I’m sorry, ignore me. I’m….” What am I? Eva didn’t have the words to explain the complexity of her emotions. Struggling didn’t seem a powerful enough word. She was on edge, balancing a fine line between surviving and falling forever.
“Mourning,” her father finished for her, putting his arms around her. “And I’ve been busy letting you take care of us and not seen how much pain you’re in.”
Sniffing, Eva fought back her tears. “I feel like you and Zac don’t need me anymore,” she answered thickly.
“Oh, Eva, that’s not true. We’ll always need you, but maybe we shouldn’t have been needing you in the way we did.” Pulling back, he studied her face. “It’s not your job to look after us, Ev. It’s mine.”
Smiling weakly, she replied, “You’d just lost your wife. It was kinda hard to be a parent.”
His mouth thinned. “Yes, but you’d lost your mom, and I shouldn’t have let you pick up the slack, but it’s okay now, Eva. I’m okay. Zac’s okay.”
“And I’m not,” she admitted, voice breaking as a tear slid loose. “I’ve no idea what to do next, Dad. At least when we were home, and I was filling in Mom’s shoes, I had something to occupy my day with.”
He wiped her tears and squeezed her tightly. “Maybe it’s time to go back to school, Eva.”
School. Just picturing the woman who lived in dorms and went to college was hard enough; she felt so far away from that person, as if she was another version of herself in another life. That girl was whole. She didn’t have a mom-shaped hole in her heart or a wolf for a brother. She was happy, shallow even. She was so carefree that Eva thought it was a fantasy.
Shaking her head, Eva tried and failed to let his words sink in. “Just pick up my old life like Mom didn’t even die. Like Zac doesn’t turn into a wolf? And what about you? What about our home? When are you and Zac going back to your old lives?”
His face fell, and Eva knew whatever came out of her father’s mouth next was going to hurt. She almost ran from the room, but she’d done enough running. Enough avoiding. It was time to face the future, however scary, head-on.
“I wanted to talk to you about that, actually. I’m thinking of selling the house. Building a home here instead.”
She took a step back. Sell her home? The home that contained all her memories of her mother. The home she’d grown up in, learned to walk in, cried in, laughed in, and watched her mother die in. It wasn’t just a house to be sold. It was her connection to her mother. The fact every time she set foot in it, echoes of her mother tormented her from every corner, made no difference. One day she’d cherish those echoes. One day the pain might be manageable enough to even enjoy them.
“That’s our home, and you want to sell it like Mom never existed at all,” she snapped. “So what, I go back to my old life, while you and Zac get new ones here with your replacement family?” Her words cut. She saw each one hit him like a blade, and still, Eva couldn’t make the words pouring from her mouth stop. “Are you going to throw away all of Mom’s things too?”
“Of course not. Please, Eva, try and understand, I’m just trying to do what’s
