A quick, hot shower and two cups of tea later, I narrowed my gaze on Alice. “What’s up with the flushing situation up there?”
Alice laughed. “You don’t like to sing?”
Sebille looked from one to the other of us, clearly confused.
I grimaced. “It’s kind of tacky, don’t you think?”
Alice laughed again, clearly enjoying herself. “It was like that when I got here. A previous Keeper having a bit of fun at our expense, I expect.”
“What are you talking about?” Sebille asked.
I grinned. “The toilet in Alice’s apartment doesn’t flush normally. You have to sing the Make Me a Magic Muffin Mister song while jiggling the handle for it to flush.”
Sebille grimaced. “Ew.”
I laughed at her reaction. “Yeah. It’s pretty weird.”
“I’ve never heard of that song,” Sebille said. “How’d you know the words?”
“They’re printed on the wall above the loo,” Alice explained. “Enhanced with a spell, so the tune is inherent inside the lyrics.”
Sebille settled back in her chair. “Okay, I’m intrigued. Sing it for me.”
Alice and I shared a look and a smile. She gave me a little nod and we broke into song.
Make me a magic muffin mister. Make me a magic song. Don’t forget to jiggle now, and you’ll never get it wrong. Make me a magic muffin mister and don’t be in a rush. Because if you don’t sing the magic muffin song, you won’t ever get a flush.
From above our heads came the sound of a toilet flushing. The toilet in the small bathroom at the back of the bookstore flushed shortly after that.
I laughed. “I didn’t know the one down here was tied to the magic too. The flusher works normally.”
Alice shrugged. “I added that when I came. It’s handy.”
Smiling widely, Sebille ate another bite of her donut. We ate and drank tea in companionable silence for a few minutes, until Sebille set her mug down on the table with a soft thump, her gaze sliding around the bookstore. “Where’d you put the suitcase?”
“Somewhere safe,” Alice said evasively. “After the last time, I wasn’t taking any chances.”
I settled my gaze on Alice. “What’s the deal with that thing, anyway? Why is everybody after it?”
Alice stared down at her tea. She was silent for long enough that I opened my mouth to nudge her. But she finally looked up, skimming a gaze from me to Sebille. “I should have been paying closer attention.” She sighed. “It’s one of a very few rare artifacts that have dimensional bending properties.”
Sebille went very still, but I was confused. “What does that mean, exactly?”
“It means it’s very dangerous. And very useful to the wrong element,” Alice responded.
When I shook my head, lifting my hands in frustration, Sebille clarified what Alice seemed unwilling to share. “Plane bending artifacts allow users to travel from one spot to another within a dimension in the blink of an eye.”
“Or from one dimension to another,” Alice added, her expression dire. “But that takes a lot more out of the user than intra-dimensional travel.”
I thought about what they’d told me for a moment, remembering the unexplained robberies Grym had mentioned. “Could it be used to step inside a bank vault, for example, and steal everything inside?”
“Precisely,” Alice said, looking a little gray. “If Detective Grym finds out we have it, we’ll be in for a real bollocking.”
I had no idea what that was, but it didn’t sound good. “He can’t blame us that the suitcase ended up at Croakies.”
Sebille’s gaze locked onto Alice’s, causing the Keeper to flinch. “No. But he can certainly blame you for not knowing what it was immediately and locking it down properly,” Sebille said in a quiet voice.
Alice got up so suddenly that her chair toppled backward. She walked away from it, toward the tea counter, and began making herself another cup of tea as if she hadn’t just been called out by the sprite.
Unless you counted the stiff and jerky way she performed the task.
I gave Sebille my best holy humperdink look and she nodded.
Alice was a bit calmer when she returned to the table. “I’ll contact the Universal governing body today and offer my resignation.”
Silence throbbed between us. I looked from one to the other of the two women. Something big had just happened, and I’d somehow missed it. I lifted my brows at Sebille, willing her to fix whatever it was.
She rolled her eyes. “I doubt that’s necessary,” she told Alice. “But you should tell them about the situation. They might have an idea of how to deal with it.”
Alice nodded but didn’t speak.
Finally, Sebille stood up. “I’ll go.” She threw me a look and then headed for the door.
Since Alice didn’t say anything, I spoke up. “Thanks for your help, Sebille. And for…fixing…me this morning.”
She inclined her head, skimmed a final glance at Alice, and left.
Alice dropped her head into her hands. She looked utterly miserable.
I struggled with whether I should just quietly leave, give her some privacy and time to pull herself together, or try to smooth things over.
I opted for the latter because…well, to be honest, I was still curious about it all. “Don’t worry, Alice, it’ll all work out.”
She said nothing, her head still in her hands.
I tried again. “You shouldn’t let Sebille’s opinion get to you. She’s just one sprite after all.” I chewed my bottom lip, feeling like I was talking to myself.
Alice’s head snapped up. “Just one sprite?” she all but shrieked at me.
I flinched, suddenly realizing I should have gone with my first instinct and escaped to my little hidey-hole.
“Just one sprite,” she repeated as if she couldn’t believe how stupid I was. “That’s just brilliant.”
Judging by her tone of voice, I was pretty sure that word didn’t mean what I thought it meant. I should have kept my mouth shut. “I’m…sorry?” I said, not exactly sure what I was sorry about.
Alice laughed a bit hysterically. “Just my luck we’d run into her on the street. Just my bloody luck.”
I was starting to suspect that maybe Sebille was not what
