“Gotta go. Thanks, Mom,” I said hurriedly, rushing out the door and into the backyard. Sure enough, Grandma Rosie was out there, sitting on a decorative rock and watching Vinnie as he ate the grass.
“I thought you were teaching him how to eat weeds,” I said.
“I was, but he won’t listen to me. So I figured at best he can act like a lawn mower.”
“It’s ok, he doesn’t listen to me, either.”
“I heard that,” Vinnie muttered through a mouthful of grass.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” I replied, earning myself a glare from my familiar, who went back to his green snack. “I’m surprised you’re not using magic to make him eat more.”
“Your mother took my wand away and found my stash of extras that I keep hidden,” Grandma Rosie muttered.
“Well, I’m going to go ahead and assume you deserved it. What did you do this time?”
“I never deserve it. Anyway, I overheard through one of the squirrels that Caroline Rocha went to the salon the other day, asked for her hair to be dyed red, and when it was, insisted that she asked for it to be dyed brown just so she could complain and get the dye and cut for free. Then when the salon said she could come back and have it re-dyed brown for free, Caroline refused, since she actually did want the red color. And to top it all off, she even refused to leave a tip for the hairdresser. She was bragging about what she’d done to Gloria, and the two of them couldn’t stop talking about just how clever Caroline was.”
“Uh oh,” I said, laughing. “What did you do?”
“I made sure that some karmic justice made its way to Caroline. I made a potion that makes all her hair melt off, broke into her house, and replaced her shampoo with it. Plus, it’s a secret recipe I developed by myself when I was in high school after Ellen Ostein stole my boyfriend, so it’s extra difficult for the Healers to come up with an antidote to it.”
Grandma Rosie grinned at me. “Then this morning I may have gone to her house and cast a spell to make the interior smell like a skunk had pooped itself, rolled in the poop, and then died and set itself on fire. She ran out of there to air it out, and I was right there to say hello and take a fun selfie to post on social media.”
“I bet she loved that.”
“Caroline threatened to burn the house down, so if you smell any smoke, it might not actually be your imagination.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Anyway, word got around, and for some reason your mother thought I was responsible.”
“Gee, I wonder where she could have gotten that idea.”
“I don’t know. Anyway, before I had a chance to react, she took my wand, and then she held up my extra bag of wands, telling me she found them under my bed. So I went to look for my other extra bag of wands in the closet, and she found that one, too. So now I’m down to using your goat to mow the lawn.”
I couldn’t help but giggle at Grandma Rosie. “Well, I’m sure you’ll be out of time-out soon enough.”
“I hope so. I explained to her that whoever did what they did to Caroline, she deserved it, but she wouldn’t listen. I’m her mother; I’m supposed to be the one to punish her, not the other way around. I don’t know where I went wrong with that one. You, on the other hand, you’re a lot more like me.”
“I hope that’s a compliment.”
“It absolutely is. I heard you came across a dead body the other day.”
I sighed. “Pyxis has to stop telling people that. It’s not true.”
“Oh, that’s too bad. I was hoping you’d have some gossip that I could share in exchange for information. I didn’t realize the information came from Pyxis. I would have just assumed it was wrong.”
“I heard from her that Bellatrix, the fairy who works with Rudoldir, her mother went to prison and eventually died.”
“Yeah, that’s true. It was a tragedy when it happened. If I remember right, Bellatrix had some problems growing up, for completely understandable reasons, but she seems to have sorted herself out.”
“Ok, I just wanted to confirm that was true,” I said. “Oh, I also have some gossip for you.”
“Oh?”
“Gloria is going to apply to open a familiar grooming center in one of the buildings downtown, next to Spells and Smells,” I said. “She hasn’t applied yet, but when she does, it’ll be open to complaints from the public, if you wanted to get involved.”
Grandma Rosie howled with laughter. “Are you kidding? I’d pay money to see that. What on earth does Gloria want to do with other people’s familiars? She never got one herself because she thinks animals are all mongrels who don’t deserve to live with paranormals.”
“I’m afraid I have no idea. I only know that she went to Rudoldir’s department to get the permission for it.”
“Well, now I have something new to look into. Thanks for that,” Grandma Rosie said.
“No problem. I’m meeting Willow soon. Can you let Vinnie back in when you’re done?”
Vinnie interrupted. “I’m done now. This grass has no taste. I’d prefer a pear, please.”
“The grass is good for you,” I replied. “You can’t live off just pears.”
“I’d be willing to try.”
I threw up my hands in abandon.
“Can you try and get my wands back from your mother?”
“Sorry, one of us being on her bad side is enough for one day, and I’d rather it be you than me. This is your battle to fight.”
“What kind of granddaughter are you?” Grandma Rosie grumbled as I waved and went into the shed.
I tidied up a little bit before Willow showed up then sat down on the couch and grabbed
