“That’s her.”
“She looks like one of the elves off Lord of the Rings,” Rich whispers.
“Holy shit, you weren’t kidding.” Brady stares at me. “You better fuck her. I need details. Look at those legs—she does not miss leg day, my dude. Forty bucks she rips the cock right off you.”
Cap spits a bit of his drink with a snort.
“How do we know her?” Carson’s eyebrows lift.
“We don’t,” Matt answers quietly.
“She walked into Lori’s room naked earlier.” Brady is obsessed.
All the eyes at the table turn from her to me, even the guys not paying much attention to our section. “No, I was the naked one. She was shouting and fully dressed and in my room. I think she’s kinda high strung.”
“She’s seen you naked already?” Cap cuts in with a dry question as he wipes his mouth.
“Yup.”
“Well, as someone who has seen you naked more than I care to, sorry about your luck, buds.” He’s quick too. “She is not going to sleep with you after seeing that little guy.”
“I’m a grower, Cap. I already told you that.” I constantly have to defend my penis for not getting hard in the public showers in our locker room.
“Mmmhmm,” Brady adds with a disbelieving expression.
“It’s a thing,” I insist, sounding like I’m genuinely worried about my dick size, which I’m not.
“A thing guys with small dicks say,” Rich murmurs, earning a knuckle pound and a laugh from everyone.
“Guys with small dicks need love too. I say go get her,” Carson offers, nudging me. “And I mean, she’s seen it. So she knows all about the disappointment she’s in for.”
The redhead and her friend, a cute brunette, seem uncomfortable and out of place as they try to pick a seat with their eyes.
“Who are they?” I have to ask. This wedding is supposed to be made up of the most exclusive group of people in New York. There’s no way a stranger is here accidentally. Unless she works at the farm, but why would she have a cabin then?
“Not a clue,” Brady and Matt say at the same time with the same tone. They’ve been friends way too long. “Must be friends of Sami’s,” Brady adds.
“No way, I would know her.” Carson eyes the ginger. “She is—sexy.”
Rich lifts an eyebrow at him.
“I mean, not that sexy,” Carson corrects himself.
“Here you are,” the server interrupts and starts placing our drinks down. “This is my favorite.”
The beer is a pale ale called Yallarhammer served with a thick head and a bitter hoppy finish. It’s not my favorite, but pale ale isn’t my kind of beer. I like a stout or porter, but when in Rome.
We lift our glasses. “To Brimstone,” Brady says.
“And Lori’s small dick!” Carson adds.
“Inside that redhead’s back nine!” Brady finishes.
I nod, realizing how this weekend is going to go.
7 Growers
Jenny
The casual dining room is the kind of nightmare I expected from the moment we were told what we would be attending. The rich and powerful on one side and hockey players on the other. And as luck would have it, Lawrence Eckelston is staring right at us. I want to crawl under a rock and die.
“Where do you want to sit?” Sukii asks, sounding as nervous as I am.
“I don’t know, maybe at that smaller table.” I motion my head in the direction of a two-person table in the corner.
“Okay.” She walks to it, sitting carefully. “So this day has been awesome. We got those killer bags filled with the best of Sami’s favorites. And you saw Lawrence Eckelston naked.”
My cheeks are likely the same color as my hair. “Why is this my life?” I whisper.
“How was it? I imagine he is a smokeshow naked. You’re all like, ‘Sukii, I don’t think we should have fun this weekend,’ and then you go for the cock right out of the gates. Well, game on, sister.”
“I never should have told you. You’re going to fixate on this.” I cover my eyes and try to take deep breaths.
“The hockey player table is staring at us again. I bet he told them and they’re all ‘shipping’ you guys.” Sukii is tormenting me.
“Hockey players don’t ship people, weirdo.”
“They totally do. I need details. Like abs and dick size, small, medium, large?” She’ll never let go of this. I have to give her something.
“He just got out of the shower—” I keep my eyes closed and relive it, shaking my head in embarrassment. “It was—he was visibly cold.” I open my eyes and cringe. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“A grower not a show—er.” She wrinkles her nose and ignores me. “I’ve been on that date. You feel so let down at first because the guy’s always got big-penis cockiness, and you see it’s a raspberry in the bushes. But then something happens and it just shoots out of his body, coming from nowhere. Like magic. So weird.”
The best part of this moment is her miming the penis growing from the body so not a single person in the room has to guess what she’s talking about. If she makes a jerking-off motion, I’m leaving.
“And what can I get you ladies?” a bubbly server asks, saving me from Sukii and the growers.
“A charcuterie board to share and two beers.” I glance at Sukii who nods.
“We like stouts, apparently.” She remembers what Sam said too.
“We have a great stout from Belgium. Sounds good.” She turns and leaves as more people pour in.
The small restaurant is becoming packed and noisy and the hockey player table is still watching us. Lawrence’s gaze constantly finds its way back to me, bringing with it the realization that I have to apologize. He was right, it was his room. I walked in on him naked and shouted at him like an asshole. I need to be the bigger person here and apologize so it’s not completely weird all weekend. And the weekend after at the fundraiser we’re planning.
“I don’t understand why they didn’t put us in adjoining rooms,” I