“That will do, Oliver.” Daniel glared at his brother; of course, he ignored the look.
“They said they acknowledged that you had saved their sister’s life… twice, but they would not allow you to converse with her again, as she is promised to another.”
Not by a twitch did he allow anyone to see his reaction to that piece of news. You never showed weakness to a sibling, or they exploited it ruthlessly. Instead he picked up his tea and sipped, trying to ease the dryness in his throat and calm his thoughts.
Abby is betrothed.
Why had she allowed him to kiss her? Was she in fact playing some kind of game with him like he’d accused her of when he found out her identity? How could he have been so wrong about her?
Abby is betrothed.
Rage that another would hold her, kiss her, and see her sweet face in the mornings burned in his gut. He hated that she’d reduced him to this. Hated that he couldn’t control his emotions for a woman when he’d fought hard to control everything else in his life.
“I wish her well,” he managed in a credible drawl. “And now I need to go and see if Alan is coping without me. I have left him alone for far too long. If I do not return, Kate will be sitting at my desk issuing instructions, and God help my clients then.”
His family laughed, believing he was indeed untouched by what Oliver had told him.
“I shall accompany you.” Oliver regained his feet, and there was little Daniel could do about that. It seemed he’d have to continue the façade that he was not bothered by the news Abby was betrothed a while longer.
He kissed his family and thanked them for his care, and then he was out on the street with the early morning sun settling around him. His large brother loomed at his side. He had a few pounds on Daniel, but they were of the same height now.
“Gabriel, the eldest—”
“I know who he is.”
“Said it was a longstanding commitment and that it was in his sister’s best interests that you kept your distance from her.”
“I have no intentions of seeking Lady Abigail out, Oliver.”
“But you do care about her?”
“No.”
“I saw you that night in the water, Daniel. Saw the way you held her, your fear for her. You feel something.”
They walked down the street, shoulders touching, passing people, and none knew that inside he was burning with resentment.
Control, he reminded himself.
“You saw nothing. We were all panicked.”
“Why is showing emotion a weakness for you?” Oliver stepped around a large pile of horse excrement. Daniel thought seriously about pushing him into it to end the conversation.
“It’s not. Now, this conversation is at an end.”
“I am your eldest sibling. I am entitled to discuss this with you, especially after those four turned up on my doorstep.”
“You should have sent them to mine.”
“You believe I would?”
“I don’t need you protecting me anymore, brother.”
“And yet I always will, as you will me and the others. Talk to me, Daniel.”
He felt it explode inside him suddenly. The fruitlessness of the emotion he felt for Abby. The frustration that his brother would not let the matter drop. Suddenly, it was as if a red mist had filled his head and he could do nothing to rein in the emotion that wanted to pour from his lips.
“Let it drop, Oliver,” he gritted out.
“You’re actually angry about something? It is enlightening to see.” He did not like the wonder in his brother’s voice. “Perhaps now we can discuss this other matter that sits between us.”
“No.”
“I’ve given it a great deal of thought—”
“I wish you wouldn’t.”
“—and feel that we’ve never really talked about that time when I left home.”
“And now is not the time… in fact, it never will be,” Daniel managed to get out around the lump in his throat. “Leave the past there, Oliver. Good God, men don’t discuss such things, and most especially not Dillingers.”
“Where is that written?”
“I have the handbook.”
“I must have lost my copy.”
They walked in silence as he attempted to inhale and exhale slowly. He could control this. Must control this.
“When I left you all, I believed it for the best, you know, Daniel. I was a large mouth to feed. Without me, the family had more food.”
That he had touched on the one really raw ugly place deep inside Daniel was not a good move on his brother’s part. This on top of the frustration he felt about Abby was not a combination that could produce anything but trouble.
“I thought it the best course of action at the time.”
“You left us without a word!” The words came out fast and sounded hoarse.
Control!
“If I had tried to say something, Mother and Father would not have let me go,” Oliver said in a reasonable tone. Too reasonable.
Daniel stopped right there on the street and looked at the man who shared his blood. Happy, composed, he was a man who now had everything he wanted in his life. Daniel resented him for that.
“I understand and am grateful for the life you have given us, Oliver,” he said slowly. “But did you wonder what would happen to us when you left?”
“I thought about you all, of course.”
Daniel pulled his eyes away and looked around them at the buildings and people. Even focused on a pretty young woman passing in the hopes that it would calm him. It didn’t. He had to speak or explode.
“I understand and am grateful for what you have given us, Oliver. But did you wonder what would happen to all those boys and men who you fought and beat? Did you wonder who they would turn their attentions to once you had gone?” His chest felt so tight, he was struggling to breathe.
Shock held Oliver silent.
“Me,” Daniel rasped. “I fought your battles every day I left the house. And I didn’t win all of them. At eight, I did not have your size,
