My cock twitches as I remember her belly swollen and round. Each time she looked beautiful. Tristan first, then my beautiful Xoe, and then Damon. I’m still convinced that Damon was Wesley’s offspring, he had his weakness, his subtle defiant streak. That’s why he had to go in the ground as he grew older. I didn’t need him questioning me in front of the little ones or trying to run with them like Tristan had.
That bitch.
Just thinking of Tristan has my teeth grinding. She gave me Casey, and Sierra, but that’s the only good thing she did with her pathetic life. The girl was never obedient, never grateful for the love I shared with her. She tried so hard to turn my Xoe against me, and after Sierra was born I knew she had to go. I put her in the ground right next to Ella, my first born who had whispered poison in our daughter’s ear from birth.
In the dark I know I can’t really see the place where their bodies lay, but I know it by heart. I dug each grave by hand, just like I had for Stephanie. Sometimes my hands bled, staining the handle of the shovel, but that was my punishment for allowing weakness, disobedience. For tolerating their betrayals.
And it was all worth it.
I haven’t had to put anyone in the ground since Damon. Xoe was heartbroken, but she understood that he couldn’t be allowed to taint the children. We couldn’t lose another generation to their quiet defiance—and we didn’t. Together, Xoe and I raised a family that understood what it meant to be loved. Really loved, with no exceptions, no favoritism.
Letting out a slow breath, I watch it turn into fog on the breeze and I feel at peace with my choices. Death is never pretty, but it is sometimes necessary to protect what matters most—and family matters more than anything to me.
“Daddy,” Casey says as he leans out the door, trying not to intrude on my thoughts, but I smile at him.
“Come join me, son.” The chill is sinking through my long-sleeved shirt, and I know I should have grabbed my coat, but I really just wanted to stand out here for a few minutes. As Casey steps up beside me, I glance over at him, at the strong profile cast in shadow by the dim light coming through the windows. He’s handsome, and I know his sisters enjoy his bed as much as mine, and he always loves them equally like a good brother should. I smile a little as I turn my eyes back to the forest spread out behind the house. “How is Sierra doing?”
Casey shrugs, scuffing his shoe on the concrete as he chooses his words carefully. “She’s okay, Daddy, but… you know what she wants.”
“I do,” I reply with a nod, watching another cloud of breath float away from me on the breeze. “Still no success?”
“Not yet.” He shrugs, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans to keep them warm. “She had her woman time last week, and she was upset, but she wants to keep trying.”
“That’s my girl,” I say with a smile, but I can feel the sadness lingering in my chest. She’s seventeen, the same age as Heather, but her sister has already brought two children into the family… and Sierra hasn’t managed to get pregnant even once. I know it bothers her, that it hurts to see her sisters swell with life, and I know just how often Casey loves her as he does his best to help.
“Daddy… she wants me to love her again tonight, but I know—”
“It’s okay, Casey. Show your sister you love her, and maybe this time she’ll be as fortunate as her sisters.” I reach over and squeeze his shoulder. “You’re a good brother to her.”
“Thank you, Daddy,” he replies, smiling at me in that lopsided way that reminds me of Wesley for a flash before it disappears. “So, what should I tell Moira?”
“You were going to love Moira tonight?” I ask, keeping my voice light, and he nods. “Well, then I’ll just have her in my bed tonight. Xoe and Heather know that they have to share my love.”
“Yes, Daddy,” Casey answers, glancing back inside through the windows, and I watch his eyes narrow as he looks over the cribs where the little ones are sleeping. I know we need to go in, that I need to check the kitchen so everyone can go to bed, but I hesitate.
“Casey, I know it’s been a while since I brought you to my bedroom, but I want you to know that I love you very much, son.”
“I love you too, Daddy, and I know how important it is to keep the girls happy.” He looks down, scuffing his shoe on the concrete again. “Maybe after Sierra is pregnant?”
“I wouldn’t make you wait that long, son. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.” Reaching over, I grab him gently by the neck and pull him close. His lips meet mine with no hesitation, and I squeeze the tense muscles at the base of his skull as I show him how loved he is. How much I appreciate him helping me to carry our line forward.
As I break the kiss, I keep hold of him for a moment longer. Studying his expression, the honest love he has for me, and I wonder if Richter will ever look at me like this.
My instincts
