She bats her teary eyes at me and I’m done for.
“For someone so innocent, you sure know how to tempt a man to break his orders,” I say, smiling. My smile grows a bit as I see her smile back at me. There’s just something about this woman that touches a piece of me deep inside, reaches a part of me I thought long dead from the shit I’ve seen and the blood I’ve spilled.
“Is that a yes?” She says, her smile surfacing even more.
If I wasn’t sunk already, I would be now; there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to see this woman smile.
“Yeah, we’ll go,” I say.
And I take her to the nearest post office, park my bike in back of the building, out of sight from the street and any passers-by.
“Give me the envelope. You stay here, and I’ll be right back. If anything happens, you take my bike and get the fuck back to the clubhouse.”
“What? I can take care of it myself,” she says.
I raise an eyebrow, run my sight up and down her body.
“You sure? Look at yourself, Addie. I think you look sexy as hell, but you will definitely raise some questions if you walk in there looking like you do. Most people don’t go for the bloody look.”
She looks down and remembers that she’s covered in dirt and blood.
“Oh.”
It only takes me a minute to race inside, hand the envelope over to the clerk behind the counter, along with a stern warning that, if he knows what’s good for him, he’ll make sure that parcel gets where it's going as fast as possible, and then I’m back outside.
Addie’s waiting for me. Her smile grows when I get closer and, though I’ve had the kind of day that’ll definitely rank among the most terrible days of my entire fucking life, her smile makes it worth it.
I’ll be damned if this woman isn’t something special.
I get back to her side and swing one leg over my bike.
“You ready?”
She nods.
Then, quick as a flash, she leans in and kisses me on the cheek.
“Thank you, Snake.”
“Don’t mention it,” I say as she swings a leg up behind me and mounts up. Addie doesn’t need to put her arms around me to keep her balance — she’s spent as nearly as many years on a bike as most of the guys in the club — but she still does, slipping them around me and pressing her chest tight to my back. It’s heaven.
And it’s dangerous; it makes breaking from my duty even more tempting.
Frowning, I pull us out of the lot and get us back on the road. I think about my duty to the club, about the loyalty and honor that — however bloody of a beast I am — is still part of my identity. I’ve twisted so much of myself in service to the club, done dark things that will haunt me until my dying days, but I still have a code. Still have honor.
Now I’m twisting it even further, breaking rules and corrupting honor. All for her.
Where will it lead?
Is she going to be the reason for happiness in my life?
Or will she be the source of my ruin?
I may not know, but one thing’s for sure: Addie Stone has a powerful effect on me. With a kiss, she can make me forget for a time all the shit I’ve seen. She makes the scars on my soul feel like nothing more than a haunted memory.
Most of all, she can make me smile.
If I’m not careful, it might get us killed.
We reach her place and hop off at nearly the same time.
She’s got her keys out and her hand locked in mine as she leads me to her place.
The shiny steel shakes in her hands and the glow that lit her cheeks earlier is gone as she opens the door for me. The door’s hardly shut behind us when she looks down at herself — at her shirt covered in blood — and her face changes. The agony and remorse surfaces again and, in manic haste, she strips her shirt off.
“I have to get it off. I can’t take it,” she mutters. “There’s so much blood, I have to get it off.”
Her shirt hits the floor along with her bloody jeans and, in seconds, she’s standing in front of me, stripped bare, with her hands wrapping herself in a cradling hug while she shakes.
“What the fuck happened, Snake? Why is there so much blood? Why do I still feel like it’s on me? Am I ever going to forget what he looked like? Help me. Please. Help me.”
I’d always pictured my first time seeing Addie Stone naked as something to be fucking proud about; she’s not some club slut, not some hanger on, not some woman I’ll throw between my sheets for a night and kick out before the sun rises because I have no inclination at all to do anything even approaching a relationship. Addie Stone is a prize. A woman to cherish.
But now?
Addie Stone is broken.
It stirs painful memories inside me. It wasn’t that long ago that I felt like her. On the edge of ruin, wondering what the fucking point was to keep living, wishing I had the courage to do what was necessary to take away my pain.
It makes my heart hurt. Hurt so deep and sincere that it almost strips my voice away.
But that profound pain spurs me to action. Reminds me that this beautiful, bright woman needs me more than anything in the world right now.
