I look around Colt’s head making eye contact with Rylee as a masculine voice fills the room. “Hello, Lu.” A shiver runs up my spine as I walk further into the house and see Tyler standing near the back door.
“Hello, Tyler. I apologize for leaving abruptly this morning, but I had a meeting I needed to prepare for at the office,” I respond robotically, hoping he will just let what happened slide.
“There is no need to apologize. I was being an ass. Shit, sorry.” He turns a light shade of red before rubbing his hands down his face. I giggle quietly as I see how ashamed he looks for swearing in front of Colt.
“Although I try to curb my swearing in front of Colt, he spends plenty of time around the track to have heard a word or two. I just hope he never figures out what they mean.” I smile as I place Colt back on the couch with Rylee. “We can head out back and chat.” I motion toward the back door; he nods his head before sliding the door open and waiting for me to go out first.
There is a light breeze blowing through the back yard as the sun sets behind the trees. “You have a beautiful home.” He comments from beside me before taking a seat on one of the chairs on the deck. “We must have similar tastes because I only live about a mile or so down the road.”
I sigh, just my luck. “What did you come here for? I think we both said everything we needed to this morning.” I wrap my arms around my waist, protecting myself from whatever other hurtful things he wants to say to me.
“I want to apologize, Lu. I should never have said those hurtful things to you. I don’t know how I expected you to wait for me all this time and not move on with your life.”
“Things change just like people. I don’t regret my son.” I skirt around the truth. I know that he has every right to have a relationship with his son, but how am I to know that he won’t just run out on him when he finds something better.
“I regret ever leaving you.” Tyler pushes up off the chair and stalks toward me. “I regret not explaining to you why I had to leave, but most of all I regret losing you.”
He stops in front of me, close enough to lean forward and capture my lips with his. I hold my breath praying he won’t kiss me but also hoping he will. Suddenly the door flings open beside us and Colt comes barreling out the door.
“Push me, please,” he says, just like a little gentleman.
“I’m sorry, buddy. Momma is talking with her friend, but maybe Rylee can push you while we finish.”
“Rweey left. She told me to come out here and play.” I smirk at my friend’s antics; she always knows when I need her help. Colt tugs on the leg of Tyler’s pants, “Can you push me?” he asks, giving his best puppy dog eyes.
Tyler looks at me with a panicked expression waiting for some instruction on what to do. I cross my arms and wait; I have no desire to help him out of this one. Besides, I was thrown in the deep end of motherhood. It’s his turn to figure things out on his own.
“As long as it’s okay with your mom.” He stares down at Colt with nothing but wonder in his eyes.
“It’s okay with me. Have you had dinner yet?” Both of them respond no before racing toward the tire swing in the backyard. I watch as Tyler carefully lifts Colt into the swing, reminding him to hold on tight before giving the swing a light push.
Colt squeals, “Higher! Higher!” as he kicks his feet in joy. Tyler smiles, not his patented smirk, but a genuine smile. The one that was only reserved for me when we were together.
I watch them for a few more minutes before opening the door and heading into the house. If it was just Colt and myself, I would probably just make some mac and cheese with a vegetable and call it a day, but since Tyler seems to have invited himself to stay, I need to make something more filling.
Rummaging through my cabinets, I smile when I notice I have all the ingredients to make my mother’s spaghetti sauce. Colt loves it and I used to make it for Tyler occasionally when we were dating. This will be the perfect meal for us to share as a family.
As soon as the thought crosses my mind, I banish it. “We are not a family. I don’t even know if he will be sticking around long enough to get to know Colt,” I mumble into the cabinet as I grab a can of crushed tomatoes.
I assemble the ingredients on autopilot letting my mind go through all the possible scenarios of what could happen if I let Tyler into Colt’s life - I come up with nothing.
Everything leads me to believe that once Tyler finds out that Colt is his son, he will have one of two reactions. Be incredibly pissed that I kept this from him for the last four years or two he will turn tail and run. My mind is fixated on one option, but my heart is leaning toward another. Most importantly I have to do what I think is best for Colt.
I finish assembling all the ingredients and turn the sauce on to boil. As I reach into the cupboard for noodles, I catch a glimpse of Colt tackling Tyler to the ground and raising his tiny arms over his head in victory.
The smile on both of their faces is contagious but doubt quickly creeps into my mind. I know
