"You said there was a lot I didn't know about Mom," Kelly said. "Want to fill me in?"
"It's a long story."
"Give me the highlights."
"Okay. You know that Mom started drinking after Dad died."
"Yes. She was falling asleep with a bottle of wine every night. It was disgusting."
"That was nothing compared to what happened after you left. She completely fell apart. She moved on to harder alcohol and drugs."
"Oh, my God! I had no idea," Kelly murmured, her gaze shocked. "Who was taking care of you and Tyler?"
"Me," she said simply. "And for a very short time, we went into foster care."
"No." Horror moved through Kelly's eyes now. "I can't believe that."
"The social worker said she tried to find you, but she couldn't. I'm not sure how hard she looked, because after about two weeks, Aunt Joan showed up to take care of us. She stuck around for six months until Mom got her act together. Mom got better after that. She held it together for the last three years I was in high school, but a month before graduation, she fell off the wagon. That started another downward spiral. By then, I knew what to do, and I was old enough to take care of Tyler. Eventually, I took Tyler with me when I moved to Denver for college. I had to get him away from Mom."
Her sister shook her head, regret lining her face. "I am so sorry, Hannah. I can't imagine what you went through. I never would have believed that Mom would fall apart like that. If I'd known, I would have come back."
"You should have known, because you should have checked on us," she said, not willing to give Kelly a pass on everything. "I get that you were angry with Mom. She blamed you for Dad's death, which was unfair and really horrible. But at some point, you should have been there for me and Tyler. We lost our dad, too, and we were a lot younger than you."
"You lost him because of me," Kelly said, her voice laced with pain.
"I never blamed you for that. You didn't know there was going to be an accident. It wasn't your fault. I told Mom that."
"You're wrong, Hannah. It was my fault."
"Just because you stayed out too late doesn't make you responsible."
"What about if I was driving the car—would that make me responsible?"
The question stole the breath out of her chest. She stared at Kelly for a good minute before she said, "But you weren't driving." She stopped, seeing the truth on Kelly's face. "Why wouldn't anyone know that you were driving? Did Mom know you were driving?"
"No." Kelly bit down on her lip, then took a big breath. "Dad asked me to drive. He was having trouble seeing with the rain and the lights."
"Had you been drinking?"
Kelly immediately shook her head. "Absolutely not. I was late because I was arguing with Jim. He wanted to break up. I was trying to talk him out of it, but we were not drinking. I swear to you that's the truth."
"Okay."
"When Dad asked me to drive, I was fine with it. I wasn't worried about driving in the rain, and, frankly, I thought it was better if I drove, because he was mad at me. I never imagined that I couldn't handle it. But the rain started coming down so hard, I couldn't see. I braked, and the car skidded, and I couldn't stop it. We were going down Grammercy Hill, and halfway down we flipped over. Dad was ejected from the car. I managed to crawl out, and I ran to him."
Hannah drew in a shaky breath, her heart racing. She didn't want to hear this. But now that Kelly was talking, she couldn't be stopped.
"Dad didn't look that bad," Kelly said. "But I couldn't get him to open his eyes. I shook him. I tried to hear his breath, but all I could hear was thunder and rain. The police came minutes later. When they arrived, I was with Dad in the middle of the street. I was in shock. I knew it was bad, but I still thought he was going to wake up. I don't know if anyone asked me if I was driving. I don’t think they did." She bit down on her lip. "When we got to the hospital, they put me in an exam room, and they took Dad somewhere else. And then Mom came in with you and Tyler. I remember how scared you both looked."
"I don't need to hear anymore."
Kelly ignored her. "Mom started screaming when she found out he was…" Kelly shook her head as tears dripped down her cheeks. "She said it was all my fault, that he wouldn't have gone out in the storm to pick me up if I'd come home on time. I knew she was right, but I couldn't make her hate me more by telling her the truth, and it just never came out. I killed Dad, Hannah. And when Mom blamed me, it felt right, because I was guilty. I couldn't look at any of you without feeling awful. That's really why I ran away, and that's why I stayed away. I thought you were better off without me."
She shook her head in confusion. "I can't believe you kept this a secret all these years." She thought about her sister's words for another long minute. "Is this the whole story, Kelly? You're not holding anything back? You're not lying about being sober that night?"
"I'm telling you the truth, Hannah, all of it. I wasn't drinking. That wasn't the reason we crashed. I guess I wasn't a very good driver."
Considering the horrific storm that night and the fact that her sister had been a senior in high school who had just broken up with her boyfriend, it was actually easy to
