Butterflies flutter in my stomach that Kohl described me in such a captivating way, “I’m not his girlfriend, traditionally speaking. I’m a girl who is his friend but there’s nothing more.”
“I’ve seen a lot with these old eyes and I know a man in love when I see him. You may consider yourselves friends but he’s vying for a whole lot more,” she nods with a knowing wink.
“Do you tan easily?”
Does he want more?
A person who knows nothing about either of us thinks he loves me. Why would he still be messing around with other women if he had feelings for me? I’m so consumed with questions filling my brain I forget she asked me about tanning.
With her questioning eyes still trained on me, waiting for my response, “Uh, I think I did as a kid. But my years spent inside, in books, have left me pale. Why?”
Clapping her hands in delight, “I’m thinking a coral color will be fabulous with your hair and eyes.”
Pondering for a second, I nod my head, “I guess I could get a spray tan.”
“Yes, that’s perfect. All the great tan color without all the skin cancer worries. I have everything I need. I will get started on this immediately. Can you come back for a final fitting on Tuesday? Oh, do you need shoes?”
“Yes, I can come back on Tuesday and yes, I need shoes or I could wear my Chucks with it. I don’t have any money to buy a nice pair of shoes.”
Blink. Blink. Blink.
Shaking her head, astonishment and slight revulsion in her eyes, “You will not wear Converse tennis shoes with this dress,” she snaps. “We will match you with some shoes when you come back to see how the dress fits.”
Staring at my Converse, I squeak, “Thank you, Mrs. Brandt. I will see you Tuesday.”
Wrapping me in a motherly hug, “You’re welcome, Tensanne. I can’t wait to see how this dress will turn out. You are going to be the Belle of the Ball.”
Chapter Sixteen
Love makes the world go around, chocolate makes it bearable.
—Tensanne’s inner thoughts
Tensanne
I HATE VISITING the eye doctor. I have been visiting regularly since I was four years old. I despise having my eyes dilated. Glasses equal insults.
“Four Eyes.”
“Window face.”
“Geek girl.”
Later it changed to, “Coke bottle wearing, fat ass,” teenagers being not so original with their insults.
Kids are dicks. I learned early in life. They don’t like someone who’s different. They get jealous of someone who makes them feel inferior. They aim their aggression on someone they deem weaker than themselves. One kid can change your world as a child. They can either become your friend or become your enemy. All it takes is one popular person to say one mean thing in front of your peers and you become the target.
Being accelerated drew a target on my back early in elementary school. Wearing glasses that got thicker every year, plus gaining weight, made the insults worse.
I have always wanted to wear contacts but the thought of touching my eye gives me the heebie-jeebies. Ronnie’s dad has offered me an amazing opportunity. The thought of LASIK is terrifying but I’m ready to shed my glasses.
Dr. Greg Camp’s office is warm and inviting. Soft, comfortable chairs line the walls, a small coffee table covered with magazines, a small nook in the corner offers toys for children to play with while they wait. Photos of famous people wearing glasses hang on the soft brown walls, interwoven with quirky photos of animals wearing glasses.
I check in with the receptionist and take a seat in the waiting area, my legs bouncing with my nervous heart beating out of my chest.
After fifteen minutes, a nurse calls, “Tensanne Craig,” and leads me into an exam room.
Wringing my hands together, sitting in the big black exam chair. I wait for Dr. Camp to enter. The room is a light blue, off to the side is the refractor which is the machine that switches different lenses in front of your eyes to quickly determine which ones will correct your vision, the slit lamp, and the retinal camera also within reach of the chair. Across from the chair are an eye chart and a small desk.
“Hello, Miss Craig,” Dr. Camp cheers, entering the room. “I understand you are here for a contact fitting and to learn about the benefits of LASIK surgery, yes?”
“I have read quite a lot about LASIK and right now I’m not sure it’s something that I want to do; but yes, I would like to wear contacts. However, I’m terrified of touching my eye.”
Nodding his head in understanding, Dr. Camp says, “That is very common. I will show you the best way to insert your lenses and if you are able, extended wear lenses are the best option for individuals with your phobia. Are you positive you are not interested in LASIK?”
“Yes. Using a laser to cut away at my eye to correct my nearsightedness is not something appealing to me right now.”
“Very well. Remove
