With fear.
“It’s also true that they asked me not to go with them. When I made my first shift into wolf, my true nature came out. I’m not an ordinary Lupine, Jenny. I’m…”
Troy took a deep breath. “Feral. It’s why the Meadowrunners really threw me out. Not because I became violent and broke their laws. It’s because they hired the wrong Lupine for the job. They needed a security guard who would dole out a little fear. Not turn into a feral wolf who could rip out a throat in seconds flat.”
He didn’t want to talk about it. But Jenny slid her hand over his, her skin warm and her expression trusting.
“I don’t see you as feral, Troy. You’re pure wolf, through and through.”
He laughed, the sound bitter. “Not even that. You feel different, Jenny, because you are. So am I. I was born with the gift of extraordinary speed. The Meadowrunners wanted me for that reason. They had the area Fae gift me with even more speed. I reckon I’m on the fastest Lupine alive, on two legs or four. But even that wasn’t enough to evade Tristan.”
“Please tell me what happened.”
Caving into her demands wasn’t easy, but this was Jenny. In her own way, she was as unique as him. Troy bit back a snort. Unique.
Freaks, some would call them.
“I was with them a few years, no real problems until the alpha and his mate had their baby. I was keeping watch over the nursery about a week after the birth when a Fae showed up in the room. He saw me, I gave him a warning and he fled out the window. The next night, I was ready. Caught him standing over the baby’s crib, his hands wrapped around the baby’s neck.”
At her harsh intake of breath, his throat tightened. “I had taken a short break to grab water. When I returned the nursery, there was the Fae. I lost control. Threw him across the room and then out the window. I shifted, and then raked claws across his throat. Nearly killed him but for Tristan, who stopped me. The only one who could. I saw him and came to my senses. He told me I’d gone too far and realized I was in deep shit. The Fae wasn’t strangling the baby, but giving him a blessing.”
“How could you know? You were doing your job!”
Troy shrugged. “The alphas forgot to tell me about the Fae and how they had access to the pack land. They kicked me out and I left for the woods, but that damn wizard was there waiting for me.”
Jenny sucked in a breath. “What did he do to you?”
She looked more concerned and angry than afraid.
“I ran, but he was always one step ahead of me. So I shifted into a wolf to fight.” Troy scowled. “He forced me to shift back into human form. That’s the kind of power he has, Jenny. Those wizards, they can do anything. Then he forced me onto my knees before him, stripped me of everything I felt. All the anger, until I felt like a used dishrag. I hated that feeling, Jenny. Anger kept me alive for a long time, kept pushing me forward.”
Her hand covered his. “I get it.”
“Tristan warned me next time I lost control would be my last.”
“But all you were doing is making sure the Fae didn’t hurt the baby.”
It made his chest hollow to dredge up these bitter memories. He had wanted to climb naked into bed with her, tangling together in passion, not get naked with his past and his mistakes.
Troy rubbed the back of his neck. “That’s how I saw it, but the Fae didn’t. Neither did Tristan, who said he’d clean up the mess I left because the Fae in that area were powerful, but sensitive and I didn’t want them on my case, or Gideon, the Crimson Wizard who is their guardian. Got the feeling Tristan wanted me to get back on the road. Doesn’t matter. I’d do it again, if it meant keeping to my oath to protect those who can’t defend themselves.”
She looked at him with admiration flaring in her eyes. Troy wanted that admiration, it warmed him inside, but not for being a feral wolf. He wanted her to feel the same way about him he felt about her.
They were two lone souls in a world that found them strange and dangerous, Lupines to fear. Not Lupines who would never hurt innocents and used their skills to keep them safe.
“It’s a harsh world out there, Jenny.” Troy stared at the fire, remembering all the times when he felt he was alone. “When you figure it out, it zigs and zags again. I thought the only life for me was to keep wandering. Lupines weren’t meant to be nomads. We were meant for pack and socializing with our kind. But when you’re like me, it’s hard to find a pack who will accept you for what you are.”
Her gaze dropped to his hands. “Why did your family really leave, Troy? Being feral isn’t always a bad thing.”
His guts knotted the way they always did when he thought back to that time. “Not usually. Not unless you do something your family can’t forgive you for, Jenny.”
“Oh Troy,” she whispered. “You don’t have to tell me. Not if it drags up too much pain.”
“You deserve the truth. Deserve to know the kind of guy you’ve been running with for all these months.” Troy slid his hand away from hers.
This would hurt, especially if she looked at him the way his family had after that day… but he wanted no secrets between them.
“My family was wealthy, hell, that’s putting it mildly. My father had inherited a bundle when his dad died and he doubled it the Skin way – in investing. Our pack was small, only about thirty members, but everyone got along.”
His expression hardened. “My father was the alpha and made sure of
